Do People Really Fall in Love in Mysterious Ways?

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Booksie Classic
A look at people who apparently fall in love in mysterious ways and how that ended up!

Submitted: September 17, 2015

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Submitted: September 17, 2015

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There is a song being played daily over and over again on the radio by singer Ed Sheeran called “Thinking out Loud”. By now many of us can probably sing a perfect karaoke to those words and with a lot of passion. We sing probably hoping and praying that love will find us the same way right where we are if it hasn’t done so as yet.  That was exactly how I felt some time ago because I was indeed thinking out loud about not only love but if it would even find me right where I was.

The singer captured it perfectly when he said people fall in love in mysterious ways, but what he didn’t sing was the fact that some of those mysterious ways is not always the best way for a relationship to blossom, bloom and last. It just doesn’t happen like that when they are mysteries because almost all relationship needs openness, trust and communication to work. Who wants to find out somewhere down the road that the mysterious ways are darker than what Sherlock Holmes, Jessica Fletcher and Poirot working together as a team can solve?

At a certain time in my life I had already experienced what married life was all about and had most certainly developed certain preconceived beliefs and notions about the whole thing called love from that perspective and this girl here was very reluctant to even try to find love where she was.  I do believe that if I was offered a space in a covenant, I would have probably taken it after my experience and seeing the mess that falling in love in so called mysterious ways can bring about.

It is in falling in love in such mysterious ways that we sometimes neglect to see the red flags, the blue flags, the green flag and all the other flags waving at us and screaming at our voice of reason as our hearts gets caught up in the passion of the moment.  Our feelings are all over the place as the new romance flourish, and as butterflies take over before they even hatched from their cocoons, we ready to declare to the world that we have fallen madly, crazily in love and have found the one. 

Sometimes we say it was love at first sight that first time we glanced at each other across the room or our first meeting somewhere. Kaboom! We truly believe we have found the one that rocks our world unlike any other; we have found our one in a million, our soul mate, lover and best friend. The whirlwind of sweet romance starts to blow as we only have eyes for each other. 

We exchange phone numbers, email address and in this age of Social Media, we friend each other on Facebook and sometimes go as far as changing our relationship status there so that friends and foes can see we are finally in a relationship.  We follow each other on Instagram, Twitter and Pinterest if these profiles exist and live in a virtual world of keeping up with every move that our new partner makes daily and revel in the congratulatory messages as others cheer us on.

That was me in my thinking out loud process; I wanted to find a love that was deep, pure and true. I wanted that love that I could shout from the rooftops, the hilltops and Mount Everest if I ever set foot there, letting everyone know that I have finally found love. I was looking for someone who would love me for me and not for what I have or could give in a world where deep emphasis is placed on material things. I wanted someone with whom I could share my deepest fears, tell my secrets to and who will laugh with me, be silly with me and be ready to go on an adventure with me at the drop of the hat. We would dance in the rain and kiss under the moonlight and then giggle like school kids as we fall in love all over again and create memories.

I was looking to find someone that I could build with as we share our memories together.  Of course I had my own dreams of what growing old together meant complete with a house with a white picket fence and children.  Thus in my thinking out loud process, I felt I need someone who shared my same insights and beliefs whatever they may be.

And so it was that when I finally thought the “mysterious” moment came I believed deep in my hearts of hearts that it was everything I longed for, hoped for and dreamed of.  However, as all mysteries goes, there was a lot that I discovered in the process that spanned a number of years that proved that mysteries are perhaps better left to detectives and private investigators because the clues that we fail to find or notice when we are blindly in love, are still there further along in the relationship.

As the butterfly moments wear off and we begin to settle down and take the relationship seriously, burning questions that haunt us about the other may be asked only to get explained away and we are told that we are over reacting, jealous, insecure or have a low self esteem.  Worst if we try to question too much habits and behavior patterns as they surface, we end up in a heated argument because we dare ask deep questions. It is almost like having hit the nail on the hands instead of the head and you experience an “ouch” moment where you withdraw in tears and you are now finally being forced to really sit and think about this mystery called love.

You see, in this world, where mysteries await to be solved, they are usually hidden secrets and hidden lives and lifestyles that if you are blissfully unaware of such during the butterfly moments and the growing moments of your love, sooner or later signs begin to show.  Sometimes it comes as a shock when the butterflies have flown away and the revealing moment of truth has come because as it is most often the case, those who are close to the one that you love would sometimes never really tell you what you are signing up for or heading in to when you are head over heels in love. Then again some concern folks may speak out, but love can be blinded when passion take over much to later regret.

If you are like me, woes betide you when you are gone too deep, feel it’s a little too late and believe that you can’t get out.  Then as you start questioning certain things, you hear the sly whispers behind your back, you see the funny glances and gestures and at that moment catching yourself, you gradually start to have inkling that you probably made one of the biggest mistakes of your life.

Now I do have to admit that mistakes do happens and there is the belief that what we don’t know can’t hurt us and more so not everything about the next person one needs to know when in a relationship that has to do with their past discretions.  Indeed, as the saying goes, something are better left unsaid or better left in the dark, but for any relationship to thrive and bloom, there must be some level of openness and sharing about certain things especially if there is the chance that these things will rear their ugly heads at some point in the future and adversely affect the relationship.

However, in taking a closer at the song “Thinking out Loud” again, while we see that it speaks about a lot of romantic things such as being held in loving arms, being kissed under the light of a thousand of stars, feeling the beating heart of the one you love as your head rest there in tenderness, it then goes on to say maybe it was all part of the plan for the lovers to fall in love mysteriously – at least that’s how I interpret it.  So romantic! Most of us envision this happening or have experienced it happened at one time or the other. However, what really stood out for me in the midst of all the romance and the promise of growing old together and still being in love, he thing sings that even when the mistakes keep repeating themselves he hopes that his love one would understand.

Those are tough words because sometimes it is so hard to understand much less forgive mistakes especially the ones that not only keep repeating themselves but more so those that can cause the most hurt or harm to us all in the name of love. I guess it all depends on just what kind of mistakes are being made, because simple things like the other person forgetting to put down the lid of the toilet – not again – or squeezing the toothpaste tube in the middle are silly mistakes that yes we wish can be done away with.

You can’t however, in the name of falling mysteriously in love, call it a mistake when the person you love conveniently forgot to mention that they are addicted to something or have been accused of something, or have a temper that in the past got them in trouble, or even is in multiple relationships before meeting you.  There is definitely no mistake in withholding certain information no matter how passionate the relation is because not only will trust be gone when these things come to light, but so too will everything the romance was built on.  As we all know, trust once gone is hard to regain. So, for this girl here while it would be nice to fall in love in mysterious ways, I would rather grow in love and get to know the person better.  I’m getting too old to play Sherlock Holmes, Jessica Fletcher and Poirot.


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