Ralof the stormcloak

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
ever wondered how and when Ralof became a stormcloak? well you are in luck, because this short comedy is going to tell you just how it happened.

Submitted: February 01, 2014

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Submitted: February 01, 2014

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Hello. my name is Ralof, and i'm about to tell you the story of the most embarrassing day of my life. apparently it's going to be "friggen hilarious" for you. (me:of course it is! *throws a peice of popcorn at Ralof*) ANYWAYS! on with the story. so, i'm from riverwood, so one day I was drinking with a couple of buddies and when we were all nearly passed out, one of them said, Ralof! yeah dude you should TOTALLY go to windhelm, and become a stormcloak! what better time to do something important than when your happy, and looking your best with those flushed cheeks you got there." I grinned, and replied "your right! absolutely! i'll go right now!" stupidest decision ever and you kno-(me: Ralof get on with it!) fine. anyways, by the time I got to the palace in windhelm, I was still EXTREMELY drunk. I barged through the doors, screaming at the top of my lungs, "MAKE ME A STORMCLOAK!!!!!I wanna kill some dogs!" by which I meant imperials. the jarl actually laughed at me to. but I stomped up to him and when I was nearly touching him I whispered "you smell like fish." smiling. his bodyguards pulled me away, but Ulfric still let me go on with it. "Galmar! come in here!" it took him a minute to get there but when he did, he said "sorry your highness I-" but sadly I cut him off saying, "heh, don't worry Gal-Gal you don't have to call me 'your highness' seriously." Galmar frowned but continued, "I was in the kitchens with my new ladyfriend. we get along quite nicely if you know what I mean." Ulfric smiled. "Galmar you tramp. didn't you just have some redgaurd women on your arms just the other day?" stupidly I decided to play along with Ulfric-but in a less friendly manner- and said "heh, yeah! your just a little man-whore who-" Galmar looked outraged.  what did you say to me?!" he got  in fighting postision. I tried to do the same thing but when I tried to step back- "AGH! GET OFF OF ME!" I had fallen on the steward. I brushed my self off just before I got tackled to the ground by Galmar. but don't worry, I eventually became a stormcloak.


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