The Fitting In Scale

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic


"All she is, is a girl who just wants to fit in."


Golden curls and bright blue eyes,

This little girl – she sits and cries.

Her fist is tight, her mind is frail;

Her eyes are blank, her smile – it fails.

No trace of youth is on her face;

She speaks the truth, she knows her place:

Alone in the corner like a doll on the shelf

No longer of use. I don’t need your help.

 

Her clothes are too big for her small, fragile frame;

Her arms are like sticks, her body’s the same:

Battered and thin, a total loss of control –

Sticks may cause wounds, but words break the soul.

 

The room is dark, it’s empty and bare;

She sits on the bed, wishing she didn’t care

And that she was happy, joyful and well –

But that girl is long gone: what remains is a shell

With eyes that have seen what others have not;

With ears that have heard of what

Not to become, as though there’s a choice –

Just ignore them, it says, that small little voice

In the back of her mind, each night and each day –

But the words always win; the voice dies away.

 

At the smell of the food, tears well in her eyes;

Her stomach growls loudly, for too long deprived,

But the guilt overwhelms her, wells in her chest;

She runs from the room to rid herself of the rest.

 

Hand clutching the lid, her knees side by side,

She grasps at her throat, pushes and cries

As sweat and tears form as she heaves at the bin –

The voice says to stop, but she needs to fit in.

 

Gasps and heaves and wracking of tears,

Choking and gagging, she gives into her fears

As hair sticks to her cheeks, the scent so vile;

She falls to the floor, finally rid of her bile.

 

Her throat is burning, her mouth is red;

Her stomach is empty, but one thought in her head

As she moves to the corner, stands on the scale,

And takes a deep breath, hoping she didn’t fail.

She looks at the screen and lets out a breath:

I did it, she thinks: 80 pounds soaking wet.

She looks into the mirror, still hating the view

Of her stomach and thighs – their words are still true:

 

She sees what they call her, thinks her size is a sin –

But all she is, is a girl who just wants to fit in.


Submitted: April 21, 2014

© Copyright 2021 smircle. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:

Comments

Emmett Cohl

First off, can it just say I've been waiting foreveerrrrrr for this! Genius poetry! And now I need more! I feel like a druggie, addicted to your poetry. Do you formulate your poems with cocaine? ???? haha, jk. But this was a wonderful way to touch upon a dreadful issue. I commend you. ~Em

Mon, April 21st, 2014 12:34am

Author
Reply

Ha ha, thank you! Sorry for taking so long, but I'm glad you liked it :)

Mon, April 21st, 2014 1:59pm

R Anonymous

Wow, you certainly have a knack for writing poetry. ^.^ This is incredibly astounding work! Never stop doing this, if it is your passion. :)

Mon, April 21st, 2014 1:22am

Author
Reply

Thank you, I'm so glad you like it :)

Mon, April 21st, 2014 2:00pm

Rosslyn Scott

That is amazing! Wonderful work, and so sad.

Mon, April 21st, 2014 7:40am

Author
Reply

Thanks :)

Mon, April 21st, 2014 3:44pm

LetTheGaymeBegin

Breathtaking, I absolutely love it! Great job!

Tue, April 22nd, 2014 6:26pm

Author
Reply

Thanks! :)

Tue, April 22nd, 2014 2:42pm

shannon jj white

This is beautiful, and haunting. You have a really great writing style, the poem flowed very well. Please write more poetry!

Thu, April 24th, 2014 2:51am

Author
Reply

Thanks so much, really glad you liked it :)

Thu, April 24th, 2014 2:27pm

Majestic Poet

This is extremely great. You should keep on writing some more poetry.

Wed, April 30th, 2014 7:28am

Author
Reply

Thank you!:)

Fri, May 2nd, 2014 2:45pm

Everean

This poem is true, which is a good thing :P Great job! I have to read your work more often.

Wed, April 30th, 2014 5:48pm

Author
Reply

Thank you! :)

Fri, May 2nd, 2014 3:56pm

dystopiandreams

Being a survivor of eating disorders this poem really hit home with me. I don't usually like poetry that rhymes but wow, this was a really strong piece. I'm glad I read it, extremely powerful.

Thu, May 1st, 2014 7:47pm

Author
Reply

Thank you for reading; I'm glad it comes across as powerful and hope others think so, too :)

Sat, May 3rd, 2014 4:17pm

mjrichardso0

Genuinely powerful and moving. Very nicely written and could quite easily envisage this being published. I usually try to include some criticism in my reviews as that is what I find most helpful but I am really struggling here. You have obviously worked extremely hard writing, rewriting and editing this and it is a credit to you. You should be trying to get this published.

Would appreciate a review of my short story "fat" if you have a moment. Thanks!

Wed, May 14th, 2014 6:11pm

Author
Reply

Oh, thank you so much! Your comment means a lot to me, as this is an issue I feel really strongly about. Thanks so much for reading :)

Thu, May 15th, 2014 12:43pm

Chris Cross

I don't like it. The way this young girl destroys herself. But I do love the way you described her ordeal. It starts (relatively) smoothly and then gets more intense and painful until we discover what really "eats" this poor little thing faced with untangible demons.

Thu, May 15th, 2014 8:41am

Author
Reply

I can't say I like it, either; but it's something I feel strongly about. Thank you for reading :)

Thu, May 15th, 2014 1:39pm

Ever A. Darling

Oh my, this was sad yet so beautifully written. The flow, the words, the meaning. It was all perfect to the point you can feel what this girl is feeling and imagine what it's like to have those thoughts. This, right here, was really good. You are an amazing writer, love. Keep me updated on any other work you decide to put up :)

Tue, May 20th, 2014 1:31pm

Author
Reply

Thank you! Really glad you liked it; and I'll be sure to :) Thanks!

Wed, May 21st, 2014 1:11pm

flygirl28

I've just recently become obsessed with reading poetry (I'm trying to write it myself) but enough about me, this poem is so powerful. Everyone wants to fit in and even if one hasn't experienced an eating disorder, the poem is still so relatable. I love love love that you rhymed every two lines, it makes the piece sound like a lighthearted and sing-songy poem, but in reality the content is so serious. I love the contrast. I agree with all the other commenters, beautiful poem!

Thu, May 22nd, 2014 3:36am

Author
Reply

My poems typically rhyme (just find it works better for me that way), so I'm glad you liked the scheme :) Thanks so much for reading- ha ha, I'm still going through that obsession, at the moment :P Good luck with yours :)

Thu, May 22nd, 2014 12:27pm

Origins and Tall Tales

Well written! My poems rhyme as well-I find it more creative that way! Thanks for sharing this intense piece, I could actually envision it. Best wishes on this site!

Sat, May 24th, 2014 10:23pm

Author
Reply

Thanks :)

Sun, May 25th, 2014 2:19pm

CheshireKitten12

Your poetry I've noticed is a mix of negative and positive emotion. I'm glad I get to read such emotional and heart breaking words. You've got a talent in writing poetry, from your profile you say your 14. Your extraordinarily gifted and to write so intensely and emotionally too. The rhyming couplets are my favourite when reading... I dunno I just like rhymes. Thank you for sharing. Gave it a like.

Cheshire~

Tue, May 27th, 2014 9:57am

Author
Reply

I've come to realise I've a rather dark mind, for whatever reason, so it's not the most positive thing around, but thanks for reading :) Ha ha, I love rhyme, too!

Wed, May 28th, 2014 2:37pm

J. D. Blood

I wasn't sure if I would like this poem at first, but than it sucked me in until it exploded into emotional waves of awesome (if sad) lines. I like that you didn't necessarily end a thought at the end of a line and that you often continued a sentence throughout more than one line; it is a valuable skill to possess as a poet.

Fri, May 30th, 2014 10:45pm

Author
Reply

I have a habit of using run-on lines (once I start, you can't shut me up! :P), which annoys some people, so I'm glad you liked it. Thanks for reading!:)

Sat, May 31st, 2014 2:45pm

Kythrala

This was truly heart breaking, that poor girl. You certainly are truly gifted in the art of poetry, you're brilliantly skilled at clearly bringing the emotion across to the reader.

Mon, June 2nd, 2014 8:40pm

Author
Reply

Thank you! :)

Fri, June 6th, 2014 2:49pm

Ally Shark

This is really good! Eating disorders are a serious problem, and for whatever reason, they never seem to get much attention from society. ???? This poem is well written and draws attention to a widely ignored subject. Definitely gets a like from me! ????

Mon, June 9th, 2014 7:41pm

Author
Reply

Thanks!

Thu, June 12th, 2014 2:19pm

ScoutMagic

The beat, rhythm (I think I spelled that right), and rhyme is EPIC!!! XD IT BLENDED TOGETHER PERFECTLY!!! :3 I love it a lot! Idk why but whilst reading this and keeping the beat in my head, I started jigging in my seat. TT_TT Tell me, is that normal behavior? XD HAHA, jk. :P But anyways, the message of this poem is clear, yes. I forgot what the eating disorder is called (something close to 'amnesia', I think) but I know a friend of mine who's got it and it's cos of society. She always got picked on back then. :/ But anyways, awesome poem! Thanks for sharing with us! XD Keep sending them requests my way! XD

Thu, June 19th, 2014 5:28pm

Author
Reply

Ha ha, I can never spell 'rhythm' right either! :P Answer this: is ANYTHING normal behaviour? O_o *ominous music* Anorexia or bulimia, methinks; and, honestly, I'd take amnesia over either anyday :S I don't personally know anyone (or I'm just a terrible friend if I do..) with it, but it's horrible to see how common it is, nowadays; it's a serious issue that needs to be dealt with. Thanks for reading! :)

Mon, June 23rd, 2014 12:17pm

rzlane7777777

LOVE IT......!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thu, June 26th, 2014 1:49pm

Author
Reply

Thanks!

Thu, June 26th, 2014 1:15pm

ShadaStorm120

Wow, this was awesome. It was very emotional and flowed really well. The rhyming was great as well. I really love this. Good job.

Fri, July 11th, 2014 12:30am

Author
Reply

Thanks! Glad you liked it :)

Fri, July 11th, 2014 2:21pm

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