Vegeta and Goku in Elmo's World

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Fan Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
This is an extremely goofy crossover of "Dragonball Z" and "Sesame Street", in which Vegeta and Goku get unwittingly caught up in an episode of "Elmo's World". I wrote this when I was about 14 and immediately forgot all about it. Then, 5 years later, my college roommate and I discovered it in my Word files and read it. We were soon rolling on the floor laughing, hardly able to breathe. If you like "Dragonball Z" and have seen "Sesame Street", I highly recommend this 4-page story for your amusement. It won't take much of your time, and you're sure to laugh.

Submitted: July 18, 2014

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Submitted: July 18, 2014

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~ “If you hadn’t sent me back to Earth with the Dragonballs, I would have been the one to defeat Freiza!” Vegeta challenged, “You only won because he blew up Namek and got caught in the explosion!”
 “If I recall correctly,” Goku grinned back, “You were already defeated when I arrived!”  Vegeta growled in frustration and struck out at Goku.
 A few weeks ago, Trunks had warned them about the androids, and Vegeta had agreed to battle Goku for training, although his main motive was his Saiyan pride. He was quite confident he would win.

 


 Meanwhile, Elmo was hosting Elmo’s World. “Hi! Welcome to Elmo’s World! Elmo’s so happy to see you. Oh, and so is Dorothy! Say ‘hello,’ Dorothy!”
 Dorothy was silent.
 Elmo acted as if Dorothy had responded and went on, “Guess what Elmo’s thinking about today!” He trotted over to Door and opened it.
 At that moment, Goku and Vegeta disappeared from where they were fighting, and appeared inside Elmo’s World. Elmo closed Door behind them.
 “That’s right,” he said, “Saiyans! Dorothy’s thinking about Saiyans too.” He indicated a Super Saiyan model in Dorothy’s fish tank. 
 Vegeta turned sharply to Goku. “Where is this? What did you do?” he shouted.
 “I didn’t do it,” Goku rejoined, bewildered, “I don’t have a clue where we are.”
 Vegeta looked at Elmo. “What is this ridiculous little animal?” he exclaimed.
 Elmo gave his characteristic, high-pitched laugh. “Elmo is Elmo,” he replied, “And this is Elmo’s World!”
 “I have more important things to do than entertain this absurd creature,” Vegeta announced. He stalked over to Door, and pulled on the doorknob. But the doorknob would only stretch. No matter how hard Vegeta pulled, the doorknob only stretched like an endless rubber noodle until Vegeta gave up and let go. The doorknob instantly snapped back into place.
 Elmo laughed. “Only Elmo can open Door.”
 “Then open it, idiot!”
 “But Elmo doesn’t want to open Door. Elmo wants Saiyans to stay here while Elmo’s thinking about Saiyans.”
 Vegeta looked like he was about to give Elmo a piece of his mind when Goku stopped him. “He’ll only open the door if he wants to,” he told Vegeta, “Maybe we should just wait here a while until he’s ready. It can’t take that long.”
 “Fine, I’ll wait,” Vegeta relented, “But I won’t wait long.” He folded his arms and stood glowering at Elmo.
 Elmo put his ear to the side of Dorothy’s tank, and nodded, muttering, “Mm-hm...Yes...Ok, Elmo will tell them.”
 “He can talk to that fish?” Vegeta demanded.
 “Sure looks like it,” Goku shrugged.
 Elmo turned and declared, “Dorothy has a question: ‘How do you turn into Saiyan ape form?’”
 Goku started to say, “I can answer that,” but Elmo cut him off, stating, “Let’s ask Mr. Noodle.”
 Elmo walked over to a strange, yellow shade hanging on the wall and ordered it, “Open up, Shade.” The shade only wiggled a bit as if shaking its head.
 “Aw, come on, Shade, open up,” Elmo pleaded.
 Vegeta snorted ironically. “He can’t even control his own...things.”
 Finally, Shade rolled up, and behind it stood a strangely dressed man with curly hair and an untidy moustache.
 “Hi, Mr. Noodle,” Elmo said to him. The man smiled foolishly and waved.
 “Dorothy has a question,” Elmo told Mr. Noodle, “How do you turn into Saiyan ape form?”
 A blank expression passed over Mr. Noodle’s face, and he became completely unresponsive.
 “Elmo thinks Mr. Noodle doesn’t understand the question,” Elmo said.
 “Well, he’s not a Saiyan, you fool,” Vegeta snarled.
 “So he can’t demonstrate how to turn into Saiyan ape form,” Goku added.
 Elmo consulted Dorothy for a few moments then announced, “Dorothy wants to ask the Saiyans.” He turned to Goku and Vegeta. “How do you turn into Saiyan ape form?”
 “Well, you need a tail, and then if you see a full moon, you’ll turn into the Saiyan ape form,” Goku explained, “Vegeta can make his own little moon that works for the moon part.”
 “Wow!” Elmo exclaimed. He turned to Vegeta. “Show Elmo how it works!”
 Vegeta glared at him.
 “Oh, yeah,” Goku laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head, “We both lost our tails. Vegeta’s got cut off by Yajirobe when Vegeta first battled me.”
 “And I would have defeated you if it hadn’t been for that fat idiot,” Vegeta added.
 Elmo looked disappointed. “Well, then Elmo can’t see Saiyan ape form because Vegeta and Goku can’t be Saiyan ape form.”
 “That’s right,” Vegeta said, “Now maybe you’re ready to let us out.”
 Elmo laughed. “No, Elmo wants to find out more about Saiyans. How can we find out more?” He thought for a moment then exclaimed, “Oh, yeah! Elmo can watch the Saiyan channel on TV!”
 Goku looked surprised. “There’s a Saiyan channel?”
 “TV has every channel Elmo wants,” Elmo told him. He went over to an apparently living television set and commanded it, “Turn yourself on, TV.”
 TV bent over, hiding its screen for a moment, then flipped back up, revealing a flashy program. Extremely irritating music buzzed from it and a voice said, “This is the Saiyan channel! All Saiyans, all the time!”
 Vegeta crossly lifted one hand, formed a ball of energy in it, and shot the energy at TV without even looking. The energy hit TV on the side, and it half-exploded, fell over, and lay there smoking, its stand’s legs twitching.
 Elmo looked pitifully at Vegeta and asked, “What did Vegeta do that for?”
 Vegeta gave a short, ironic laugh, “Hah! It was annoying me.”
 Elmo turned away, without a word, but perhaps he was plotting his revenge. Then he looked up and said in a sing-song voice, “Elmo has a question fo-o-o-o-o-or you! Yeah, you!” A cartoon sort of picture of the Saiyan planet appeared, and Elmo inquired, “How many Saiyans are going onto the Saiyan planet? Count with Elmo.” Little cartoon images of Saiyans started appearing and walking onto the planet, and Elmo started counting. Vegeta was surprised to recognize one of the images as his father.
 “...Eight, nine ten! Ten Saiyans!” Elmo concluded. Then a cartoon image of Freiza appeared and shot the planet with a stream of energy from one finger. The planet and all the Saiyans on it disappeared in a badly-drawn explosion. The Freiza faded away, cackling.
 Elmo laughed, “And one Freiza destroying them!”
 Vegeta’s expression was of utmost fury. It was obvious that Elmo had gone too far. “You make a mockery of my planet’s destruction!” he roared, “I’ll kill you for that!” He clenched one hand at his side and held the other one out, forming a large ball of energy in it. He aimed it at Elmo.
 Elmo only gave his characteristic laugh. This time it seemed rather sinister. “But if Vegeta kills Elmo, Elmo won’t be able to open Door for Vegeta,” Elmo reasoned.
 Vegeta realized this was true and forced himself to close and lower his hand. Instead, he grabbed Elmo by the head and lifted him so that he was at eye-level. “You’re not getting away with it that easily,” Vegeta growled, “Let us out of here, or I’ll kill your fish.” He readied a ball of energy, pointing it at Dorothy’s tank.
 Elmo only gave Vegeta a weird look then suddenly shouted, “Drawer, attack!”
 Before Vegeta had time to respond, a drawer dashed up and opened with amazing force into Vegeta’s chest, knocking him onto the ground. He got up immediately, exclaiming, “What is this ridiculous thing?” Drawer opened again suddenly, and Vegeta blocked it, taking to the air. “All right, I’ll humor you,” he smirked, “I’ll crush this piece of furniture!” 
 Elmo grabbed Dorothy’s tank and scrambled into Mr. Noodle’s area behind Shade. “Kill Vegeta, Drawer!” he squealed.
 Drawer couldn’t take to the air, but Vegeta soon realized that this wasn’t a particularly important fact because Drawer could open as far as it wanted, and that was its primary means of attack.
 Drawer was incredibly fast, and Vegeta had to spend more time blocking than attacking. In addition to this, it could knock aside energy blasts shockingly easily. Vegeta decided that energy blasts weren’t the best means to fight Drawer, so he started descending to attack it manually.
 At that moment, Drawer opened especially quickly and unexpectedly, catching Vegeta a glancing, but astoundingly violent, blow on the side. Vegeta landed on the ground, and although he got up instantly, it gave the speedy Drawer enough time to get into close range, and start opening and closing exceedingly rapidly. Drawer could open so far that Vegeta found it difficult to block its swift blows and reach around them far enough to attack at the same time.
 After a while of this, Vegeta shouted, “That’s it! I’ve had enough of this ridiculous game!” He shot up into the air and began powering up a Final Blast attack.
 Drawer didn’t wait for Vegeta to ready his attack. It opened suddenly and knocked him down again.
 “Need any help, Vegeta?” Goku called.
 Vegeta got up and continued to fight Drawer. “I don’t need help fighting furniture from a Saiyan peasant!” he spat.
 “You never lay off on that, do you?” Goku said.
 Vegeta got up into the air again and started up his Final Blast. This time he was ready for Drawer’s attack, and dodged it while still preparing his attack.
 Finally, Vegeta shouted, “Final Blast!” and let loose a discharge of energy that filled the room.
 For a long moment, smoke filled the room.
 When the smoke cleared, all of Elmo’s World was laid to waste. Shade was torn, TV was a pile of ashes, and Computer lay sizzling in a corner, weakly uttering, “Elmo has mail.” But Drawer remained. It was battered and broken with half of one leg missing, but it was still able to fight, and it opened the moment Vegeta came into its view.
 Vegeta wasn’t expecting the attack, and was hit again.
 “Hey, Vegeta,” Goku suggested, “How about I use my Kamehameha wave on Door?”
 “Fine, you can do that,” Vegeta told him, “But leave ‘Drawer’ to me!”
 Goku put his wrists together with his fingers bent in the Kamehameha position, and started forming the attack. “Ka...me...”
 Vegeta moved behind Drawer before it was expecting it, clenched both fists together, and brought them down on the top of Drawer.
 “Ha...me...”
 Drawer crumpled to the floor, and Vegeta fired one last energy blast to make sure it was defeated.
 “HAA!” Goku let loose his Kamehameha wave on Door.
 Vegeta turned and smirked at Elmo, Dorothy, and Mr. Noodle who were watching through the tattered Shade. “We’ll see if Elmo is the only one who can open door,” he said.
 Sure enough, the Kamehameha wave smashed right through door, leaving a huge gap into the outside world. “Finally!” Vegeta exclaimed. He wasted no time getting out, and Goku was close behind.
 Elmo came up to the gap in Door, clutching Dorothy’s fishbowl in his arms. “Elmo will redraw Elmo’s World. Then Elmo will get Elmo’s revenge!” he called after them.


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