Yesterday, by Sophie Todd

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Literary Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
Yesterday was inspired by the song Yesterday by the Beatles. Story is written by me, in 8th grade. Hope you enjoy :)


Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away.
Now it looks as though they're here to stay.
Oh, I believe in yesterday.

Suddenly,
I'm not half the man I used to be,
There's a shadow hanging over me,
Oh, yesterday came suddenly.


Why she had to go
I don't know she wouldn't say.
I said something wrong,
Now I long for yesterday.

Yesterday, love was such an easy game to play.
Now I need a place to hide away.
Oh, I believe in yesterday.

Why'd she had to go
I don't know she wouldn't say.
I said something wrong,
Now I long for yesterday.

Yesterday, love was such an easy game to play.
Now I need a place to hide away.
Oh, I believe in yesterday.

Submitted: January 05, 2012

A A A | A A A

Submitted: January 05, 2012

A A A

A A A


 

The monitor carves a steady beat in my brain. Beep. Beep. Beep. My Father’s dry, cracked hand is limp in mine. The spots on his hospital robe where my tears fell have already begun to dry. All I’ve been thinking about all day are moments with my Dad. Singing Peaches while he sliced one for me. Driving to the park with Rosco sticking his furry butt in our faces the entire time. Listening to the Beatles in his car. Watching Cake Boss and marveling at Buddy Valestro’s brilliance.

Gone. All of it gone. Just like that. In one moment, my life is flushed. It’s amazing and terrible how just a few seconds of your life can change everything. For the past few weeks, it hadn’t been a change for the better.

I look out the window of the hospital room at the beautiful sunny day. Some birds are chasing each other. I glare at them. How dare they enjoy themselves? How dare they play while I’m stuck in here with a Dad who’s almost dead? And a Mom who doesn’t do anything but cry? My jaw tightens. Matt just ignores it and plays video games. I’m there, keeping it all pulled together on my own. I’m the mom now.

I stare at my Dad’s face. Lines run along it, marking his steadily growing age. His skin is pale like stone, but his mouth is peaceful. Like he’s getting a rest from the rest of the world. Like he’s finally getting to sleep. Like he’s not even here. Like he’s… no. He’s not dead yet. I shake my head, trying to rid the awful thought from my head. He’s not going to die. He won’t. He can’t. He can’t leave me any more alone than I already am. He can’t cut the last thread of hope I have. That would destroy me. And I can’t be broken.

I look to the ceiling, to the sky. How could He do this to me? Was it supposed to teach me  a lesson or something? Because that’s a pretty horrible way to teach a lesson. What have I ever done to deserve this? Nobody deserved this. Not Mom, not Matt, not Dad, not me. That car crash was not a gift in any way. I’ve learned nothing from it except pain. Pain which I have never felt before. Pain so deep it’s like there’s a hole in my chest. How could God want that? Why would he want a 13-year old girl to have to go through this? I thought God loved everyone. My eyebrows knit together and I stared at the rough hospital blankets hard, trying to blink away tears. I hate You, I thought. I hate You.

And I have never hated anything so much as I hate Him. My hands are shaking. I want to take a chair and throw it at the window. I want to scream. I want to yell at the nurses and doctors, “fix him! Fix him! What’s wrong with you people?! Fix him!!” I want to slap Dad in the face. Yell at him too. But I know that wouldn’t do anything. So I hold it back, just like I’ve been doing my whole life, and try not to cry. I have to be strong. I have to hold it together for Matt and Mom and Dad. I manage this until I start thinking about the incident. I don’t remember much. What I do remember constantly shadows my mind, never relenting, never giving me a moments peace. A tear lets loose, and so does the painful memory.

I was laughing, scooping Graeter’s peach ice cream into my mouth, our favorite. Yesterday came on, and Dad and I sang along. It was one of his personal favorites. It was dark, and the lights were a blur all around us. I looked out the window contentedly, happy just to be sharing a moment like this with just my Dad. My eyes flicked to his face, which was smiling despite the sad song, bobbing with the beat of the music.

Yesterday,

All my troubles seemed so far away

Now it looks as though they’re here to stay

Oh, I believe in yesterday…

I looked down to scoop some more ice creamy goodnes into my mouth. And that’s when it happened. A flash of lights, and Dad’s arm flew out to protect me. I felt a push coming from my left side, and the car started tumbling off road. I couldn’t tell where we had gone, or how many times we’d flipped, or anything at all. All of my senses were a blur. I couldn’t see anything for a moment, but when my vision came back, I was on my side on a pile of shattered glass, with rocks and grass poking at my body. The first thing I saw when my eyes opened was my Dad’s face. His glasses were smashed, his eyes were closed, and his face was frozen in a tight frown. I stared and stared at that face for what seemed like hours. My muddled mind was moving slowly, not comprehending what had happened. Because that couldn’t happen to me. Really awful things never happens to yourself, only to people you didn’t know, people you hear stories about and pity. You listen to the grim, whispered stories, but you’re safe because something horrible like that won’t ever happen to you. That’s only for books and movies and people you’ve never herd of. Blood was slowly gliding down his face, like the trail of a red tear. I squinted, trying to concentrate. I could hear noise. Cars whishing past, and something else. Music. I closed my eyes and tried to concentrate.

Why she had to go

I don’t know, she wouldn’t say

I said something wrong,

Now I long for yesterday…

And that was the last thing I heard before I blacked out. I remember waking up in a hospital bed (cliche, yes, but that’s what I remember), and seeing my Mom hunched in a corner like some crazy person. I propped myself up on my elbows, and Mom lifted her head. Her hair was a mess, and looked like she hadn’t brushed it in days. Her eyes were red and puffy, and her cheeks were tear-stained. Her clothes looked dirty and rumpled, like she’d been sleeping in them. Her tight mouth relaxed slightly but pinched up again when she saw my worried face. I had never seen her like this before. Mom stood and swept over to my bed, taking my hand and kissing it, tears wetting my sheets.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered over and over again. I had no idea what she was talking about. “It’s all my fault... I’m sorry, so sorry…” I was completely lost. How was it her fault? She hadn’t caused the car…. The car crash, I thought, beginning to remember. The lights. Pushing. Dad’s face. Paul McCartney’s somber voice filled my head. I looked down at her.

“Dad…” She just shook her head and layed her head back on my leg, weeping into the blanket.

“It wasn’t your fault, Mom,” I whispered, stroking her hair. "You couldn’t have done anything."

“I knew somethig bad was… was going to happen,” she gulped. “I should have stopped you from going. I’m… I’m so sorry.” Her voice broke and she let out loud sobs. I closed my eyes and wished away the world...

It had been about a month since the tragic accident, and Dad still wasn’t getting any better. He had suffered several broken bones, a nasty concussion, and now a coma. I look back up at him, probably looking just like Mom had. Crazy, with rumpled clothing, no makeup, and grimy cheeks. Yesterday is still playing in my head.

Why she had to go

I don’t know, she wouldn’t say

I said something wrong

Now I long for yesterday…

And on yesterday, a new noise fills my ears. BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP. Flatline. Everything seems to get colder, and speeds up rather than slows down. Doctors and nurses rush in, but I can’t see them. I know they are there, but I don’t fully comprehend it until a nurse puts her hand on my shoulder. Her big brown eyes look at me with pity, and she takes my hand.

“We have to go, honey. I think you should leave. We’ll try to make it better, okay?” I squeeze Dad’s hand tighter and managed to choke out a few words.

“Don’t even try. He’s…” my voice breaks and my vision gets blurry. I can make out those brown eyes, staring at me with empathy. But I don’t want her pity. I can’t be broken. I’m unbreakable. I’m… Alone. My walls of defense suddenly crumble as the newest and rawest wave of emotion hits me, but I know that I will not break. I’m strong. That’s what my Dad would want me to be. That’s what I had to be. For him. For my family. I leave the room, Paul’s voice ringing through my head.

Yesterday,

Love was such an easy game to play,

Now I need a place to hide away,

Oh, I believe in yesterday…

 


© Copyright 2017 Sophie Todd. All rights reserved.

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