I turned on my computer and waited to be inspired
But woe I just got nuthin or maybe I'm just tired
I thought I'd write about myself to try for your reply
But then looked in the mirror and heard myself just sigh
I thought I'd start with my face about my chin should be no trouble
But then gazed in the mirror and all i saw was double
I looked up top of my head just where my hair should be
But then saw i had less up there and more in nose to see
I asked my wife for her advice as I was always good at kissin
but she just laughed and said not now as one of your lips is missin
When she asked if I would like to lose loads of ugly fat- I said I would by heck
Then she just said chop my head off and get rid of all above the neck
My body was once a tuned engine like a sportscar it would hum
Now the only humming noise is the sound from out my bum
I thought I would clean my teeth and see what difference that would do
But I realised it didn't matter when all I got is two
I knew that I'd put weight on across my chest and guts
But my stomachs like an island and my breasts are like 2 huts
I gaze upon my manhood which was once a firm strong lance
but now its just a saggy thing that leaves droplets on my pants
I thought I'd call the Doc in as felt quite out of breath
There was nothing to prevent my meeting with my death
He said I was critical and had no more than a day to go
Then apologised- as he saw his watch was 24 hours slow
Now I draw my final gasp and think about lifes meaning
I finally know the answer ..its aaaaghh.....
Submitted: April 10, 2012
© Copyright 2023 speed racer. All rights reserved.
Comments
Thanks...glad u enjoy.....just light hearted fun....hope u join as fan
Sat, April 14th, 2012 10:42pm
that was really good great potery man
Mon, April 23rd, 2012 8:06pm
Author
Reply
Thanks
Mon, April 23rd, 2012 6:09pm
Lmao, again. Okay you have me in stitches now. Great sense of humor. Loved it. :) Sherry
Tue, April 24th, 2012 7:14am
Author
Reply
I changed the ending..wat u think
Tue, April 24th, 2012 5:31am
nice poem with a humorous style.. nice job:)
Tue, April 24th, 2012 9:16am
Author
Reply
thanks...i like a challenge ...how bout u send a subject you think would work...i will start a poem and u can add if u like
Tue, April 24th, 2012 4:45am
a subject that will work? hmm.. something editorial? hehe.. sorry for the topic.. cannot think of another
Fri, April 27th, 2012 8:37am
Very funny style content and perspective
Sun, December 30th, 2012 8:46pmFacebook Comments
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Insane Membrane
sounds like your mrs is one lucky bird
Tue, April 10th, 2012 7:39am