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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Gay and Lesbian  |  House: Booksie Classic
Confessing your feelings to someone you know won’t return them is a treacherous task. However, by doing so, Skyler has opened a door she mightn't be able to close. It’s not one of rejection or fear, but one of Jealousy. Who knew that things would end up this way, especially after all this time?

Submitted: December 05, 2012

A A A | A A A

Submitted: December 05, 2012




This story is completely fictional and not based on anyone from my actual life. The ideas, themes, characters, actions, dialogue, and anything else mentioned within this story belongs solely to the characters involved and not those of the author. No harm/insults are intended.

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I felt the nerves pulse through my body at an alarming rate. Was I actually about to tell her how I felt? After all this time was I about to confess it all? It didn’t matter; by the looks of things this was happening whether I wanted it to or not. Taking a sip of my drink I began to feel unusually calm as I walked over to where she was standing against the wall.

“Hey you,” I chimed in an overly cheery tone, giving her a light nudge as I lent against the wall beside her.

“Hey Skyler, what’re you up to?” she responded casually, giving me a smile that indicated just how little she suspected about our upcoming conversation.

“Well I just wanted to tell you something really,” I continued in a tone that was far too relaxed for my liking before taking another sip of my drink.

At this rate it wouldn’t be long until I’d need another drink to replace this one. However, my ability to drink so much was probably the result of why I was about to do this in the first place given that I was already onto my 5th drink of the night and it was still quite early.

“Yeah, what might that be?” Kara asked, interrupting my train of thoughts and taking another mouthful of her drink before looking back to me.

I didn’t know why this conversation was so calm. Wasn’t this the kind of thing that people were supposed to worry excessively over? Well I knew why she was calm, she had no idea about what I was going to say, but me, well I should have that gut wrenching, adrenaline rush racing through my body, but I didn’t. It was probably the alcohol giving me this false sense of confidence but it didn’t matter either way.

“Ok,” I started, placing my empty glass down on a nearby table, “Well basically I just wanted to say that I like you. I mean I know you’re my friend and all and you don’t like me back, that’s cool, but I just thought I’d tell you I guess,” I finished calmly, giving her an innocent smile before turning to leave.

“Uh, that was a bit random don’t you think?” she asked, her eyebrows furrowing slightly as she spoke.

“Ha, yeah I thought that too, but then I was like, ‘Who cares? I should tell her.’,” I explained with a slight laugh playing in my voice as I turned back to face her.

Even now things didn’t seem as awkward as they should’ve been, well from my point of view anyway. It was starting to worry me. Well it was mainly the fact that I knew I’d regret this in the morning. But at the moment I didn’t care. I was just going with the flow.

“Yeah well, thanks for that. But no, you’re right, I, uh, I don’t feel the same. But I uhm, I guess I’m flattered,” she mused, handing me another drink, with a slight smile.

“Thank you. But uhm, yeah that’s cool,” I smiled, taking an overly big mouthful. “I didn’t expect you to. Like I said, I just thought you should know, that’s all. Anyway I, uh, I should be going. Thanks though Kara, have a good night” I finished, making my way to an abandoned chair in the middle of the living room to sit down.

However I could hear Kara call back something that sounded like ‘See you later’ before I’d gone too far, and I responded with a backwards wave and thumbs up. It was probably rude but I had no intentions on staying there for a moment longer. I had to get away before I made things worse for her than I already had. ‘I am so going to regret that tomorrow,’ I realized, taking a seat on the leather lounge suite and having yet another mouthful of my cocktail.

I sat there calmly sipping my drink and enjoying the uplifting beats coming from the stereo, just relaxing and lightly thinking about the recent confrontation. Well I knew she wouldn’t like me back. But why do I feel as though I’ve been rejected if I didn’t have a chance in the first place? Before I had a chance to get lost in the thoughts of what’d just happened, it wasn’t long before I was interrupted by the surprise of someone taking a seat next to me. Turning to face the culprit I was greeted by the beautiful face of a girl about my age, nineteen.

Placing my drink onto the coffee table I introduced myself, “Hey I’m Skyler, and you are?” I asked, holding out my hand, still feeling calmer than I should with a nervous smile playing on my face.

“Oh, uhm, Colbie,” she replied with a laugh, shaking my hand gently, “it’s, uh, it’s nice to meet you Skyler.”

When she replied all I could focus on was her beautiful green eyes. I sat there, admiring the way they shone in the flashing lights. Her smile too showed such a lovely smile and perfect teeth. Her face was innocent but had a mysterious edge to her expression that claimed otherwise. It was weird, I’d only just met her but I knew there was something different about her. I didn’t know what it was, but I had a feeling I wanted to find out. It was like I was instantly drawn to her. Why was she so…captivating?

“So, are you enjoying the party?” I asked casually, trying to hide my probably-all-too-obvious interest in her.

“Yeah it’s alright, better now though,” she smiled, shifting in her seat, moving slightly closer to where I was sitting. “What about you?”

Of all times for this to happen it was now. After everything that’d just taken place it was now that I felt that nervous flow of adrenaline surge through my veins. But it wasn’t a bad nervous like I’d expected, it was more, excited.

“Well it could be considered interesting I guess,” I answered, trying to stay calm and collected.

“Interesting? How so?” she asked.

Why was she making me feel this way? I didn’t know what to think. Finishing my drink and placing the empty glass back onto the coffee table I leant back into my chair. “Well, see my friend over there?” I asked, pointing in Kara’s general direction.

“Yeah?” she questioned in an inquisitive tone.

“Well uhm, I kind of told her that I may have had feelings for her just before I came to sit down here. But I knew she wouldn’t feel the same way and yeah, I was right,” I explained.

“Oh, what did she say?” Colbie eagerly replied as a look of interest encased her face.

“Well I told her that I knew she wouldn’t feel the same way and she said I was right but she was still flattered, then I, uh, I left. So yeah I don’t really know what happened after that,” I finished, flashing her a quick smile.

Leaning forward, Colbie placed her hand on my leg, “That’s a shame she didn’t feel the same way. I know I wouldn’t have said no,” she finished, her eyes meeting mine once more.

The adrenaline pulsed through my body uncontrollably at her touch. Was this actually happening? Was she actually flirting with me? I didn’t know what to do except sit there wishing I still had a drink with me. Looking around with nothing to focus on I turned back to face Colbie again.

“Well, uh, thank you,” I smiled, still unsure of what to say.

“It’s ok,” she smiled back, her hand still on my leg.

We sat there for a minute or two in a silence that was unexpectedly relaxed. I was expecting it to be a bit more awkward given that we didn’t really know each other too well, but funnily enough, it wasn’t. Breaking the silence and moving her hand off my leg, Colbie decided to stand up. I don’t know why but I was disappointed at the sudden lack of contact between us.

“Come with me,” she whispered, holding out her hand for me to accept her invitation.

Reaching up eagerly I took her hand, and got to my feet, “Ok, but where are we going?”

“You’ll see,” she replied with a mysterious smile and a wink.

Her spontaneity caught me by surprise. Where were we going? I wanted to know. I responded with a nod before she led me away from the main party and crowd of people. Colbie walked me through the kitchen and down one of the halls as I willingly followed without a clue as to where we were going. That was until we reached a dead end and she led me through a small door hidden to the left. The room was quite small, given the size of the other rooms, but it was still a decent size and offered a welcoming atmosphere.

As we stood there Colbie continued to hold my hand, subtly moving in closer as she did so. There was something about the way she looked at me that made me feel relaxed, comfortable, safe even? I knew that it was weird, but there was this connection between us that I couldn’t explain. Why was I feeling this way? Colbie suddenly let go of my hand, leaving it feeling empty and cold from where her once warm skin had been. I couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed, yet again.

“I guess you’re wondering why I’ve brought you here?” she asked, sounding a little less confident than I was used to.

I gave a little nod, unsure of if I should speak yet or not.

“Ok well, uh, I wanted to tell you that, uhm, well… I, I kind of, uh, I kind of like…you,” she finished in a tone that seemed quite assured to what’d I’d expected.

It was kind of obvious by the way she was acting that she liked me, but did I like her back? There was this weird feeling she gave me when I was around her. It was captivating in a strange way, like I couldn’t leave her even if I wanted to; which at this point, I didn’t.

“I uh, thank you?” I said, unsure of how to act to this sudden, however expected, news.

By the look on Colbie’s face, I could tell that she could sense how I was feeling. However, to be honest I didn’t even know how I was feeling, so I doubt what she thought would be anywhere near right. I was wrong.

Out of nowhere Colbie moved to place her arms around my waist gently and I welcomed the gesture without any hesitance. Slowly and almost immediately, as if out of reaction, I placed my arms around her too. Everything with her felt natural. I’d suddenly forgotten about my feelings for Kara. Colbie was all I could focus on. Strangely enough I didn’t feel any guilt about Kara anymore. If she didn’t like me then why should I feel bad for being with someone that did?

Her beautiful green eyes stared back at me, as if trying to read my thoughts, her smooth skin was flawless and soft and all I could smell was the refreshing scent of musk, lightly lingering through the air around us. It was pure bliss. Slowly Colbie started to lean in closer, and I responded again, as if out of instinct.

We were getting closer and closer and I couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like. To have her soft lips against mine, our bodies pressed closely together and being caught up in the moment with only ourselves to worry about. Breaking me out of my trance of thoughts, I could feel her warm breath on my face as we were getting closer to each other, by now we were only mere millimetres apart. I closed my eyes as the adrenaline surged through my body at what could have been considered an alarming rate. I was sure I would’ve been too weak to stand on my own if it wasn’t for Colbie holding me to her.

Our lips touched for the first time and the sensation continued to flow throughout my body. It was an intense feeling, something new, like nothing I’d ever felt before. I moved my hands up to meet her face as we embraced in our chaste kiss. However, this was short lived as the passion grew. Our mouths began to move faster and it wasn’t long before she began to run her hands along my body gently, making my heart race even faster.

I could feel the sensation pass just under my skin when her fingers brushed over me. I didn’t want to stop. This wasn’t like me. Usually I’d get to know someone a bit better first before I’d even think about kissing them, but this, it was different, comfortable; it felt right. Colbie started kissing my neck and we were getting caught up in the moment; it was perfect and time was definitely not a factor.

I began to run my hands along her back; her skin soft against my hands. I wanted to do so much more than just kiss her. Things that not even I wanted to admit to myself. Taking control, I pushed her against the far wall of the room, causing her to give me a look of desire before I leant in, kissing her passionately once more. I could feel the lust in her kiss now and I couldn’t help but wonder where this was going to lead us.

Fervently I felt her hands run across my stomach under my shirt. I felt my already racing heartbeat increase even more at her unexpected touch. In response I did the same to her, moving my hands higher along her abdomen and finally removing her shirt and tossing it across the room. I didn’t know what had come over me but at the moment I didn’t care.

Her hands continued to explore my body, moving gently across my skin before removing my shirt too. Leaning in I kissed her once more, placing my arms around her neck and holding her close to me. This new experience was something different, exhilarating; refreshing even. The feel of having her pressed up against me, her soft skin on mine, our chemistry connected by this one simple gesture was exhilarating.

I didn’t want this to stop. In this moment I felt like I could be who I was openly with no problems or worries. Gently I began to kiss Colbie’s neck, trailing my lips softly down to and across her collarbone before continuing down, running my mouth across her chest. I could feel the exhilarated pattern of her breathing under my touch, which closely mirrored the pattern of my heartbeat. I was having the same effect on her that she had on me.

As if out of nowhere, the door flung open, rendering me with nothing but thoughts on what could’ve happened. Releasing a flustered Colbie from the wall I turned to be greeted by none other than Kara; a look of shock sprawled across her innocent face.

“I, uhm, K-kara,” I muttered, unsure of what to say in this situation.

“I-I’m s-sorry,” she stuttered back, clearly embarrassed, turning to walk back through the door.

I looked around. Why’d she have to walk in now? Couldn’t she have waited? I can’t believe that she’d walked in, let alone whilst I was with Colbie. This was awkward. Just as I was about to say something – anything – to fix the situation, Colbie interrupted.

Holding out her hand to shake Kara’s, Colbie decided to introduce herself, “You must be Kara? I’m Colbie. It’s nice to meet you.”

Reluctantly shaking her hand back I heard Kara mutter, “Yes. Uhm, it’s nice to meet you too.”

Quickly finding my shirt and putting it back on, I walked nervously over to Kara, passing Colbie her shirt as I did so, “Colbie, I’ll, uh, I’ll talk to you later ok? Thank you for, uhm, showing me around,” I finished with a wink, standing next to an awkward Kara.

“It’s ok, anytime,” she replied with a smirk, a hint of smugness visible in her voice as we turned to leave the room.

As soon as the door clicked behind us I grabbed Kara by the arm, leading her down the hall and onto the secluded veranda at the back of the house. I was afraid of what might happen.

“So what was all that about?” I asked her.

“What was all what about?” she replied defensively.

I took a deep breath, “you know exactly what I’m talking about. Why’d you have to walk in like that?” I asked, the anger was evident in my tone.

Why was I angry at her? It wasn’t her fault. I still liked her didn’t I? Of course I did. Meeting Colbie couldn’t change that, could it?

“You have no right to be angry at me on this one. YOU were the one that told ME you liked me. How was I supposed to know that you’d end up with your tongue down the throat of the next girl to talk to you?” she all but shouted back at me.

“I, uh. I…” I stuttered, trying to find the words. She had a point.

“Exactly my point Skyler. You don’t just tell someone that you like them then leave with some random. I know I didn’t give you the best reaction but what was I supposed to do? It’s not every day that someone confesses their feelings to you, let alone you of all people.”

What’d she mean by that? Me of all people? Was she expecting someone else? My heart dropped at the thought. I wondered who else it could possibly be with no names coming to mind. Should I just ask her? Of course I should.

“Wh-what do you mean by that? M-me of all people?” I finished in a barely audible whisper, looking down to avoid her stare.

I could hear her sigh a breath of, frustration, disappointment? Wasn’t I who she wanted to hear this from? Clearly not. But who then? Maybe it was because I was her friend? Does that mean it’s a good thing then? I hoped so.

“Look, I didn’t mean it to offend you, I just…” I could hear her sigh again but this time it was clear that it was because she didn’t want to explain herself, “I just, didn’t expect you to feel that way about me. I mean, others do like Neil and Brian, but not, not you.”

I didn’t know whether or not that was a good thing. Did she like me? Surely not. But then again it wouldn’t be the first time this’d happened to me. I stood there, slowly looking up to meet her nervous gaze. Did she really mean what I thought she did? I couldn’t help but respond with a confused look.

The awkwardness between us began to grow rapidly. All I wanted was to walk away and go back to Colbie; at least she didn’t cause confusion like Kara did. I just wanted to know what was going on. I just wanted the closure I needed.

“Listen Kara, I-I’m not quite sure what you mean by that, but I’m sorry if I confused you or caused any unwanted feelings. I think it’d be best if I just left ok. I’m sorry.”

Before I’d had a chance to move Kara had her hand around my arms, pushing me backwards towards the railing. I really hoped that this wouldn’t turn out to be violent.

“Look, I don’t want you to go but I just find it unfair what you did to me. After you told me how you felt I couldn’t help but realize that I felt the same about you. It really hurt me to see you with her Skyler. Can’t you see that?”

I felt a jolt of emotion surge through my body in an instant. I could hear the truth in her voice. The fact that she actually felt the same about me after all this time surprized me. But I couldn’t help but feel some compassion towards Colbie too. Why’d she have to make this more confusing?

Wiping the tears from my eyes before they had a chance to make their way down my face, I decided that I’d better explain things to her. “Look Kara, it’s not that I don’t still like you, because I do, but I have feelings for Colbie too. I don’t know what it was but we just connected within a moment. It has to mean something too. I, I don’t want to upset you but it’s not exactly fair to make me choose on the spot.”

“CHOOSE?! IS THAT WHAT YOU THINK YOU HAVE TO DO?! FOR GOODNESS SAKES SKYLER…JUST URGH!” she yelled, removing her hold on my arms viscously, a look of complete devastation and loss crossing her face.

Walking over to her I placed my hands on her face, “Kara, I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just things have gotten complicated and we’re not exactly in a sober state to think this over just yet. But please, don’t yell,” I whispered, scared that I’d provoked another outburst from her.

“So that’s what it’s come down to has it? Choosing?”

I could hear the familiar voice from behind us, her footsteps getting closer with every breath. Not releasing my gaze on Kara, I could see Colbie moving closer from the corner of my eye. What was she doing here?

Pushing me back, Kara lashed out, punching Colbie across the face in one swift movement before she had her hands fumbling through her hair, teeth digging into her arm. Colbie was completely helpless at her lack of preparation. What do I do?!

“STOP! JUST STOP IT!” I yelled, grabbing a hold of Kara’s shoulders, releasing Colbie from her wrath. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“LET ME GO! JUST LET ME GO, OK!” she panted. “Just do whatever you want. Just go and hook up with that thing and finish off what you started. I just don’t care anymore Skyler. This is more trouble than it’s worth and it’s clear to me that you’d pick her over me. I’m just going to go,” she finished, a complete look of resignation on her face.

“Look, uh, don’t go. I’m sorry if I’ve caused something between you both. Maybe I should be the one to go,” Colbie interjected, wiping the hair out of her face before walking towards the door to go back inside. “It was nice to meet you both. Enjoy the rest of the party ok.”

“Don’t go. Please.” I pleaded.

Colbie stopped, only to turn and face us both. I really hoped that there would be no tension between us after I explained my feelings towards this to her.

“Ok, Kara, I know that I told you I liked you and I do. In fact I could even love you, but things with Colbie, they just feel different. Not a bad different either. Yes I have feelings for you both but it’s not necessarily a bad thing. But Kara you had your chance. You rejected my feelings the moment I confessed them to you without a second guess.” I could feel the tension shift from being between Colbie to being with Kara. “But Colbie, well she chose me. I didn’t ask for this to happen, it just did and I shouldn’t have to feel bad for being wanted. I’m sorry Kara but you had your chance with me.”

“AFTER ALL THIS YOU CHOOSE HER?!” I couldn’t help but feel guilty about this. She had a point. “Gosh Skyler, I thought I meant more to you than that. I really did. Maybe it is best that you didn’t pick me after all. I, I should go,” she finished, the disappointment and hurt was evident in not only her expressions but her tone as well as she slowly made her way past Colbie and through the door without so much as a backwards glance.

I didn’t know what to do but whisper a barely audible ‘I’m sorry’ as Colbie wrapped her arms around me tightly. It was sad that it had to come to this, but I made the right choice didn’t I? Well they say that if you love two people always choose the second, because if you truly loved the first you wouldn’t have fallen for the second in the first place.

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A.N. ~ I hope that this story wasn’t too corny or lame. It is my first time writing a proper short story without the topic of an English assessment. Please let me know your thoughts on it and any changes that need to be made. Thanks again for taking the time to read it and I hope you enjoyed it for the most part!

© Copyright 2017 SPURIOUS. All rights reserved.

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