- Holding A Balloon -

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
Holding A Balloon.

Submitted: March 13, 2013

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Submitted: March 13, 2013



Holding a Balloon:


When I was younger I was holding a balloon,

I was so scared that it would fly away.

Needless to say, I let it go and off it flew,

I’m not convinced I did it by mistake.

It was with great despair that little child watched,

As it grew ever smaller in the sky.

That’s when I knew that I would never grow attached,

To something on which I could not rely.


And even now I still get scared,

When I have in my hands something I hold dear,

That I might let it go in to the wind;

That I might bring about the thing which I most fear.


I guess that, ever since, that’s how I’ve always lived,

A frightened and reluctant little boy.

Avoiding anything that might come with a risk,

Even if it might bring me great joy.

I have a tendency to always play it safe,

And tell myself I’m happy with my lot.

Too scared to ever take a chance in any way,

In case I lose what little I have got.


And every night I lie awake,

Scared to death and haunted by my dreams,

Where everything that I have breaks,

And the things I love the most abandon me.


All of my life I’ve always had this crazy dream,

That one day I’d be happy and content.

That I would marry and have children of my own,

And look back on a life that was well-spent.

Maybe one day it will happen - time will tell,

But it can never happen ‘til I dare,

To pull myself out of the doubt in which I dwell,

And finally be brave enough to care.


But until that day, I’ll have to cope,

With these feeling that I’ve carried all along.

That there is no point in feeling hope,

When there’s always the chance something might go wrong.


And this fear I have that I’m forever doomed,

To always be that little boy with no balloon.

© Copyright 2018 Stephen Fieldsend. All rights reserved.