A Northern Night Out

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
A look into a culture that few understand.
The words Bird means woman, slag means easy virtue and five finger discount means shop lifting

Submitted: August 18, 2012

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Submitted: August 18, 2012



A voice in the mirror,

God your good looking.

The Italian chin covered in Brut

with the eyes of an eagle,

faintly ringed from the last shift down the pit

all captured in the energy of youth.


No more graft, the pit wheel has stopped.

This night belongs to him

and some bird is about to get lucky.


But love has many players

its Intoxication is addictive.

Saturday night on the town,

wildlife on display.


From the liar bird to the labra doodle,

each predator drawn to the smell

 of Impulse at a pound a bottle

 and a faint smell of urine.

The vomit will come later.


Eyes are everywhere as they drink

Vodka from concealed bottles.

Up North we don’t pay their prices

for five finger discount rules the night.


And the back biting begins

look at her mutton dressed as lamb

and Betsy is my best friend.

Even though she’s a slag

for sleeping with Gavin last night.



These herds of Wilder beast

In painted hooves,

displaying their courtship rituals.

Dancing around the sacred handbags,

ready to stampede at

the sound of last orders please.


Glances across the dance floor,

the weak and easy singled out.

The outcome uncertain, the winner

destined for passion, or maybe more.


The loser to sit alone on the bus home.

That miserable face in the window,

that passes by as you cross the road.


Consolation found in a cold kebab

and just one last thought,

As you pass wind beneath the sheets

before that snoring lager sleep,

Mirror, mirror on the wall

You tell lies.


And the pit wheel will turn

the beer will wash the coal.

His Saturday will be earned,

a bird for tonight

and a wife for tomorrow.


Make the most of your luck lad’s

for some lass’s will have none.

This colliery that brings life

that fuels your Northern culture

will also bring up your dead.








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