The Hole, Message 2

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Editorial and Opinion  |  House: Booksie Classic
What's missing?

Submitted: November 05, 2008

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Submitted: November 05, 2008



Ever feel like your life’s gas gage is on empty? Ever feel like you live a good life, but there’s just something missing? Ever feel like you’re alone in your hardest times, and instead of being carried you feel like your being pushed down? Ever feel like there is a big void, a hole that fills your life? Sure you do, we all do. Let me share with you why you have that hole, then I’ll tell you how not to fill it.

We are created as the perfect creatures, with something missing. As the saying goes: “the only thing perfect is imperfection.” We have thousands of gallons of blood flowing through our body through the course of our life non stop that keeps us living. Even while we sleep, our heart is hard at work, keeping us alive. Our lungs are the same way, even though we lose consciousness, our lungs keep that clean air coming, pumping oxygen into our blood stream. The best part is, we are self-maintained machines. We don’t have to tell our bodies to do this, it just does. Our lips spell out the words that we speak to communicate full sentences and thoughts with others of our species, something no other animal can do. We can use the process of elimination to solve our problems and take a logistical approach to any thing we do, as our brain functions far beyond other creatures on earth. Nerve endings let us feel a soft touch or a loving kiss or a warm embrace. We can smell the flowers because of the function of our nose, we can hear all the glories of music with our ears, and our eyes allow us to see the beauties of the world and the dangers ahead. Yes, we are the perfect creatures, but were built with something missing.
What is that something missing? Well, its that feeling of loneliness, the feeling of desperation in your hour of need. It is the feeling that you have nothing left in this world. Sometimes it’s the feeling of an internal hunger that just won’t go away.
So how do we fill this hole? All too often people feel it, but are not sure what it is, so they try to fill the hole the wrong way. They shovel all their guilt into it and that does not work.
Some try to fill it with meaningless, loveless relationships full of lust, hoping that will make their pain go away. They go through meaningless relationship after relationship trying to fill the void with pleasures of the flesh, breaking hearts along the way only to feel just as empty in the end as when they started.
Others try to fill the hole with their own over indulgences. They feed their addictions to drugs, alcohol, or food trying with every indulgence to numb them selves into happiness, knowing in the end they will find none.
Some think that the hole is an endless pursuit that they must fill with money and material things, and when they get these things they only want more and more but are left feeling dull and finding that all the money in the world cannot buy happiness.
There are some out there that think that the hole will fill its self so they do nothing. Sometimes they have just given up on trying to fill the hole so they spend their days sinking deeper into depression. They stay in bed or on the couch watching hours of endless mindless television that gives them no pleasure. They remain empty all the days and all the nights.
Some actually get angry with, what they see as, a flaw in themselves so they let their tempter get the better of them and blow up for no reason. They throw their wrath down the hole hoping to fill it quickly so they can get on with their lives, and this never works. Sometimes they beat, physically and mentally, the ones closest to them out of the anger they secretly have for themselves. They end up feeling worse about what they have done to others and the hole deepens.
Often, people think that others have what they do not and this is not right. These people fill their void with jealousy for what others have. They see others having the love that they so badly want. They see others having the peace that they do not. Their desires for what others have makes the hole to grow bigger.
Some mistakenly think that they have no hole. They believe that their lives are perfect, in fact, better than perfect. These are the people that find themselves beautiful inside and out, so much so, that when placed next to others; their beauty actually makes others uglier. It’s like that old trick where you take your ugly friend out to the bar to make yourself look better. I know, its mean, but you’d be surprised how many people do it! Deep down they know the hole is there, they hope that if they ignore it, it’ll just go away. Meanwhile, the hole grows.
Maybe you recognize yourself in one of these types of people, and maybe not. Maybe you heard my words and said, “wow, there really is a hole in my life.” That is a good thing, because once you realize the hole is there, it is much harder for the hole to continue to grow. Slow the growing, and you can start to fill the hole. There is a secret to filling the hole. Maybe you already know and live the secret. If you do, then you know that once you fill the hole, you become whole! I know what you’re thinking: “It’s easy, just fill the hole with love….” Okay, kinda. It’s a little tougher than that, but the good news it can be done, and when you are whole, you will live a fuller, more meaningful life full of love and happiness. So, now for the hard stuff: how to fill the hole.
First, we must acknowledge that the hole must be filled and cannot be ignored. The first layer that you must lay to fill the hole is like a lining to make sure nothing else leaks out from the bottom. You see, until you put the lining in, the hole remains a bottomless pit that will suck all your intentions into the abyss. Think of filling the hole as baking a pie. You have to have the right ingredients, but first you must make the crust to hold the fillings. The ingredients will help you bake the hole into the wholesome pie you want to be. Now, I will tell you what you must fill the hole with, but first, know this: there is one easy stop to get all the things that you will need to fill your hole. One source, and one source alone, but I will get to that after telling you what you need.
You must start by filling the hole with that first layer. That layer is love. I know, you say, “But I do love, I love a lot!” No, no my friends, I mean love yourself, as well as others. If you battle the things I mentioned before, then you know deep down that you have an issue with how you lover yourself. If you want to love others and fill the hole of emptiness in your life, then you must first love yourself. Acknowledge that you have flaws, and love yourself not in spite of them, but because of them. After you love yourself to the fullest, you must then put in the next lining. Knowledge. You must acknowledge that you are loved, and arm yourself with the knowledge that you are never alone because you are loved. It is one thing to tell yourself that you are loved, it is quite another to really take it into your heart and know that it is true. Do not lie to yourself, be honest and only admit that you know you are loved when you really feel that way.
After starting with a good helping of love it is time to move on to the truly hard stuff. You have to make a mental commitment to change. You can start by throwing some purity into the mix. By purity I mean not just fighting the carnal urges of the flesh, though that is part of it, I mean purity of heart. Try to be a good, honest and pure person every day in everything you do. Do not give into the excessive urges of the flesh, instead replace those “needs” with pure acts.
Next, learn to fight your addictions with self-restraint. You cannot fill the hole with over indulgence, so you must use all the self-restraint you can. This is a tough one to do alone and knowing the secret is not always getting the answer, so you may want to rely on others for help here. If you have a physical addiction, and cannot fight it alone, seek help. Every town has therapy available, often at no cost. Admitting you need help to exorcise self-restraint is not a show of weakness. In fact, it is a show of great courage and strength. Never forget this if you find that you are battling addictions and inner demons.
For those who try to fill the void with the endless pursuit of material things and money: the old adage that it is better to give than to receive is true. There are few feelings in the world quite like giving to those in need especially if you can see their reactions. This will fill that part of your void faster than any amount of money ever could. Charity is the ultimate way to fight greed.
As I mentioned before, there are those who feel that it is hopeless to even try to fill the endless pain and void in their lives so they hope that it will just go away. You must use what you have to get out there and do something with your life! Be diligent! Exorcize a zeal for life and be willing to really get out there and live life. Be grateful for the air in your lungs and the blood in your heart! Remember there never has been and will never be another quite like you!
One of the most important things you must fill the hole with is forgiveness, compassion, patience and composure. You must have these things not only for others, but for yourself. You must forgive yourself if you have hated yourself in the past. If you find yourself turning to acts of rage, you must ask yourself why, and forgive that which caused the rage. Be patient. The bible says in James 1:19 that “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” And it is right. You will find that if you are patient and hear the whole story in any situation, that it will not cause you to become as angry and you can take a more level-headed approach to the situation.
Then, fill the hole with kindness. Be kind in your heart and your acts. Show admiration to those who have what you do not. Do not be jealous of them, but respect them, because they have undoubtedly worked hard for what they have and if you look up to them and work hard as well, you too may have what they’ve got. Remember that everyone has their demons and no one is perfect, so show kindness to those who have the kind of life you would like to have. It is easy to turn envy into admiration, or turn anything negative into something positive for that matter!
Next, realize and admit to yourself that even though you love yourself, you have flaws. Do not be vain, but instead be humble. Put the top layer in that hole by filling it with just the right amount of humility. The best way to do this is to do a kind act anonymously. As much as you may want to take credit for it, don’t.
Restraint and love are the keystones of personal fulfillment in life. If you love yourself, then you will find that you have already turned many of the nasty habits that you have been throwing into the hole into positives that fill it.
Now for the most important ingredient in baking your wholesome pie: the source to all the other ingredients. Now that you know what you need to fill the holes in your life, where do you get these things? Where do you get the strength to carry you when you can’t carry on? How do you know you are loved when you feel alone? The secret, the answer, is simple my friends: GOD. There once was a man who was perfect. There were none before him, and there have been none since him. This man was sent by God to be your savior in your hour of need. He was sent and died specifically to save you. He was sent to take the seven deadly sins that hound your life and every other sin off of your shoulders and onto his and offer you a way. There is only one place to find the Chastity to battle the urges of Lust, the Temperance to battle Gluttony, the Charity to battle urges of Greed, the Diligence to fight Sloth, the Patience to suppress your Wrath, replace your Envy with Admiration, and help you swap your Pride with Humility. That place is found in Jesus Christ.
To twist the words of a horrible 90’s rap: “Christ’s Cross is gonna make you… JUMP, JUMP!” Christ will give you the energy, the support, and the love to help you fill the holes in your life and avoid creating new ones in the future! He is your guide. He is your way. The ultimate solution to all of your problems lies in faith in the one and only Jesus Christ. God created us with something missing. He created us to be imperfect. If we were perfect, we would be sin-free and not need a savior. He created us with that special void that can only be filled by knowing him. This was part of his grand plan. Now that you know how to fill the void in your life, what are you going to do about it?

© Copyright 2019 StevenJAdelmund. All rights reserved.

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