And then I understood

Reads: 477  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 8

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Booksie Classic

This is shit, basically. But it's better for me than what I want to do.

 

When I was younger, I was so confused.
Why would someone tear their skin,
Draw blood and leave scars on purpose?
And then I found out.


When I was younger, I was so confused.
Why would someone bend over a toilet bowl,
Empty their stomach until they were shaky and pale.
And then I understood.

As I grew up, I became more confused.
Who was this person I was becoming?
The person I promised I wouldn’t become,
Broken inside; a monster with a sick mind.
 

But then I accepted it.


Submitted: April 18, 2012

© Copyright 2022 StrangeMind. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:

Comments

sunnyskies

Ohh I can relate to this so much. It's really good though. Take care!

Wed, April 18th, 2012 5:47pm

Author
Reply

Thank you, and thanks again! I'll try!

Wed, April 18th, 2012 10:49am

kaftr8drk

dat's deep,going through a tough society.aren't we.

Wed, April 18th, 2012 8:36pm

Author
Reply

Thank you so much, and we are

Thu, April 19th, 2012 7:45am

Memories1995

It's very inspiring and I believe you are admirable for being able to recognise what you are becoming, thus allowing you to change it. Alhough, it won't be easy. Nor will it feel any better. Writing is a good way to take your emotions out on something other than your body. You should respect your body as the Gods have made it for you to fulfill a purpose. The purpose is still unknown but don't waste any oppurtunities.

I'm sorry for rambling, I guess I tend to speak to myself when I review, which isn't exactly a quality characteristic. The only advice I can offer is that the structure of the poem isn't as flowing as it could be. The use of repetition and anaphora in the first line of each stanza is effective. However, the 2nd and 3rd line just seems like it could flow better. The pattern of three is successful in making us believe your confusion, but the 'on purpose' takes away some of the effect. You could have done this purposly to suggest that your feelings on the topic aren't as intense or that you don't relly believe it will ever effect you. If so, I apologise for jumping to conclusions.

The last line, I adore it! Its so casual but powerful that I can understand your finality. I believe that you truly have understood this 'monster' you have become, accepted that you can't escape its tainting grasp. It illustrates that only you could tuly accept it because no one else could understand. As a previous reviwere has stated, society is tough. And cruel, judgemental and frightening. To accept yourself despite the backlash and thoughts of others is a very strong thing to do and you have reflected this through your poetry, even if you portray yourself as 'broken'.

I believe I have rambled on enough and I must admit your poem is very inspiring and makes me feel your acceptance.

Memories1995 xxx

Tue, April 24th, 2012 6:19am

Author
Reply

Again, thanks for the long comment! Not only for the compliments in it, but also for the constructive criticism about the lines, I'll keep that in mind :)
Thank you!

Tue, April 24th, 2012 8:19am

inspiredbylove22

Another nicely processed poem :) I like the last line of each verse and the last line, very simple but effective! It's such a sad topic, one that I don't personally understand, but admire the bravery of yourself to write about it openly. Like the above comment said, taking it out on paper is a much better way to deal with the 'demons'. You are not a monster :)

Sat, April 28th, 2012 11:05am

Author
Reply

That's so lovely, thank you! This is such a sweet comment :)

Sat, April 28th, 2012 4:22am

Shattered

Oh my god this is an amazing poem. I can relate to this poem so much.

Sat, April 28th, 2012 8:39pm

Author
Reply

I'm sorry you can relate with it, but thank you for saying it's amazing, and thank you for the comment :)

Sat, April 28th, 2012 1:43pm

Brighkandy

Sun, April 29th, 2012 8:18pm

Author
Reply

I'm going to take the hearts as a good thing, so thank you ^^

Sun, April 29th, 2012 1:21pm

Adam Williamson

You did great, um I can't say I've been in ur shoes there but it takes alot to admit stuff and uh you really get the point across and I think that by admitting and knowing you do stuff like this its brave and to be able to just admit it, you should be proud

Sun, May 6th, 2012 6:42pm

Author
Reply

Aww, thank you so much! Yeah, my counsellor said that that's the first step to getting better and everything, so you know :3 Thanks so much for commenting ^^

Sun, May 6th, 2012 12:04pm

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