Anyway, come to see it, it was all daddy’s fault. If only
he had remembered to kiss her before he left for work, we will have been in our own sweet three musketeers’ paradise now.

Mommy refused to eat this morning. That was bad of her.
Doesn’t she know her protests will affect our livelihood?
There are three of us here for crying out loud.

Anyway, come to see it, it was all daddy’s fault. If only
he had remembered to kiss her before he left for work, we will
have been in our own sweet three musketeers’ paradise now.

When mommy didn’t reply or text him the whole day, boy, he knew
he was in big trouble.

So he came home with a big Toblerone begging for the big forgiveness
from mommy. Daddy was smart. I like that fella. He knows his moves,
I tell ya’.

We wore our napkins and sat at the table. Licking our lips.
It was so exciting. To get a piece of the sweet Notorious B.I.G.

Mommy took the first bite. Our mouths were wide open.

It was the most anticipated moment after mommy brought the
hunger strike on us.

As the broken pieces came in, Hog hogged the first spell.

Log, my little sister, had been been feeling weak since the afternoon.
She had to have some food. I let her have the next spell of mommy’s food.

Just as the food went in Log’s mouth, Hog said, ‘Hey, Log, I think
this chocolate would taste better in my mouth.’ Just like that
Hog put his hand into Log’s mouth and took her share out. Then put it
in his own mouth. Ain’t that somethin’?

‘Hog, why do you do this all the time?’ I demand with a
storm on my brow.

‘Shut up, Dog. She can have the next one. Besides, this
chocolate tastes better in my mouth than hers.’

We haven’t been officially named, yet. On that tide,
I am called Dog, because I am the one who barks and alerts about
things. Log is someone who allows people to cut through her.
She doesn’t care. She will even give her limb, if someone asked her
for it. She is too generous. I hate it. Last, and going by the way he is,
he will last – Hog, well, that’s the only name that suits him.

‘You keep saying the same thing as if it is a fact.’ I am angry.

‘I am just saying, she doesn’t need it much. She is a girl.
I am a boy. I am bigger than her. I could use the
extra nutrition.’ Hog says munching on Log’s food.

‘Hog, I am bigger than you are! You know who you are, Hog?
You are like the bad version of Oprah Winfrey. You want
everything. You already got yours. But you still want hers.
Then, everybody else’s.’

How can someone shack up the nerve to take something out of
someone’s mouth? That which is already inside? Damn.
Besides, how can Hog feel that the chocolate will
taste better in his mouth than Log’s mouth? JUST HOW!
It is like telling a pregnant woman, ‘Hey, I think that baby
would be better off with me.’

Log took me aside to console me.

‘Log, I understand that this is not our permanent home.
We eat what mommy gives us. That is secondary. What’s
important is that you don’t allow yourself to be taken for
granted. Hog is a greedy fellow. He is NEVER complete with
what he has. He is only complete by taking that thing which
makes you complete. Do you remember the time dad sang us
Presley’s ‘Let me be your teddy bear’? We had our ears
pressed against mommy’s stomach and what did Hog do?
He pushed you away. So that he could take away your
attention as well.’ I spoke like a machine gun on red bull.

‘It is okay, Dog. I don’t want me to be the cause for
you two fighting.’ She cut me out like a saint.

God have mercy on her, for making her so unworldly.

‘Listen, Log. This time, you have got to take an action
against Hog. This atrocity has to stop. You have got to tell
mommy what Hog has been up to.’

Log says she doesn’t want to. I insist.

I make sure that she incubates under the heat of my insistence.

Log kicked mommy. Kicked hard. Mommy cried in pain.
She cried in pain for so long.

Log didn’t like that.

‘Dog, I can’t do this. Look what you have already made
me do! Mommy will be thinking that I am a crybaby.’
Log was depressed. More depressed than she was when
Hog’d foxed her meal.

Understood. What can mommy do? She was helpless.
She was like the God between Israel and Palestine.
Israel being Log, of course.

I couldn’t see our mommy in trouble. What had I done?

I should have never got me involved in the first place.  Henceforth,
if Hog eats Log’s pie, I am just going to suck my thumb and
mind my own business.

Why should I be concerned when she is not?
I love my little sister Log. I like Hog, too. Just that he needs to
mend his ways.

As far as Log is concerned, I don’t want to get her to do
something that she doesn’t want to. I want to be the person
she buys candy from when she is back from war. Not the one who is
cursed for putting her in a coffin.
I do read poetry sometimes. I am just sayin’, if you were
wonderin’ about my swagger.

Anyway, if I have learnt anything from today, it is that . . .
I don’t have to shake hands with any business unless I am bringing home
the bacon (I don’t mean my nasty brother).



Submitted: April 03, 2015

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