Reality, it hurts

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Fantasy  |  House: Booksie Classic
All i wanted was a land filled with trees and flowers, to fly in the blue sky... now i`m not sure if that's possible anymore...

Submitted: December 22, 2011

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Submitted: December 22, 2011

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"Where have all those dreams gone to?" I said aloud to myself, sighing.
During my childhood days, when I was around 6 or 7, my parents would leave me in front of the television for hours without caring as they had work and other important stuff to attend to. There was a movie I loved and could never forget, and the movie’s name was 'Peter Pan'. It was adapted from a book written by `J.M.Barrie`. Peter Pan, the movie, was about a boy named Peter who lived in Neverland. He could not, would not, grow up. But what caught my interest and attention almost instantly was the fact that he could leave the ground without the aid of technology and gadgets, he could fly! When I first watched the movie, I loved Peter Pan. As I grew up, I envied him and now I simply want to be him.
 
  Do not get me wrong, the type of flying I want is not the type which requires technological assistance to be accomplished. I do not want to sit in a metal bird to go places, nor do I want to use a helicopter to gain lift off. I desire flying against the wind, letting it move through my hair and send chills down my spine. I wanted to belong to the sky, not be an abnormality in it.

  Ever since the day I found out about winged humans and people with the ability to fly, I had set my childish mind on joining them in the air. It was a ridiculous thing to do, I know that now, but I was young and my imagination was wild and crazy then. And yet, for some weird, unknown reason, I still hold on tightly to that wish, praying, hoping. I plainly love the idea of giving humans wings, sleek and gorgeous, to join the creatures of the world above. But even without wings, just the thought of being in the sky with all its creatures made me grin, gave me pleasure.

  I would stare at the sky, which consisted of multiple shades of blue and white, when I was growing up. Outside of my childhood house which was surrounded from all ends with two or three story houses and trees amongst them, I used to sit in the balcony for hours on end, just gazing at the mysterious sky above. At nights, but not every, a beautiful moon would hang in the dark sky, illuminating the area with its radiant white light which it stole from the sun. The stars, suns millions of miles away from earth, twinkle in the sky, making me smile with joy. Oh! And how the clouds, ever so white and fluffy, would be suspended in the night sky, sometimes obscuring my vision of the cratered moon, sometimes just drifting along with no given purpose.
 
  In the mornings and when the sun was back from the other side of the world, the sky would be just as magnificent. The world seemed so lucid, so magical. Multicoloured birds of various species filled the soft blue sky with their spectacular flying and skilled soaring, making it a sight to always remember and never forget. I longed to join them, to spread the wings I wish I had and to fly amongst them.

  My favourite time of the day was twilight, or better known as sunset, when the sun was at it’s horizon and day and night met. I would wait eagerly for the church bells nearby my house to go off, indicating twilight time. Somehow, at that time of the day, the world always seemed to be on a standstill, much more peaceful and serene. It bewildered me, the sight of it. How a multitude of colours would paint the sky and birds would fly in groups, breaking the silence with their chirps and squawks as they play among themselves. If observant enough, the sounds of crickets rubbing their hands together and the buzzing of bees accompanied by the fluttering of butterflies and beetles could be heard at a distance.

  I hade made a promise to myself at the age of 12, when my thoughts were still innocent and gleeful, that I would live by the country side when I was older and could manage to live by myself. Why such a promise was made? Plainly because I wanted to wake up every morning to fresh air and beautiful scenery, just like how I lived when I was young, only with more greenery. I wanted more trees and flowers, less bricks and concrete. Hills and valleys everywhere I turn. I wanted to see bunches of bluebells and daffodils surrounding my path, covering the land. I wanted to run on grassy fields. I wanted what I realize now as the impossible, a fantasy.

  My family and I moved to a new house much more closer to the city when I was 14. This new area was filled with vehicles, engine exhaust, ill-tempered people and traffic all around the clock. I hated it. By the time I was 16, I had grown into a rebellious teenager, every parents worst nightmare, and I knew it. I wanted so badly to return to the place I had once lived in, but my parents told me that it was no more. The whole area was demolished to be made into a shopping complex. Just the thought of that being done disgusted me! All that lost beauty, robbed in the name of industrialization.

  My childhood was gone, the area I grew up in destroyed, and all I had to treasure it by were simple memories, fading quickly into blurred up images, similar to quick silver. At that time, I found a reason to why I wanted to fly so badly. It was because I wanted to be able to leave reality, to just leave everything that hurt and pained by flying away when things and life got harder, more difficult and troublesome. A coward’s thing to do, to run away from responsibility, but I did not care for it did not matter, not anymore, not when everything I had ever dreamed of was stolen from me in a blink of an eye. We were killing the earth and there was nothing in my power that I could do about it.

  Now, in present times, I stand by my apartment window. As I look out of it, the world I once knew, loved and cherished as a child was lost, consumed by time itself. I gazed left, right, up and down and the view I received sickened me. The used to be green fields are now covered and filled to the brim with high raised buildings, reaching all the way up to the dark sky before disappearing from sight into the thick smoke above. Not a bird in the sky. Not that it would have survived if it was in the sky anyway. The sky was almost always coloured in different shades of black, thick with smoke and pollution, so much so that day and night became practically indistinguishable. But to trained eyes, every slight change in the shades of grey in the filthy sky meant a different hour in life as another wasted moment passes by.

  What happened to the sky and forest dwelling creatures? What had become of their home? Most animals were now only found in museums, killed and stuffed. The remaining animals which strife to survive in this harsh conditions were very few. Most were kept in zoo’s and experimenting facilities. Trees and plants were kept in weather controlled domes and greenhouses. To see the flowers that at one time were scattered everywhere we looked, now had to be paid a fee to just be glanced at. Almost every creature except for humankind was at the verge of extinction. It was vice versa for humans. Over populated with the human species, most people lived in apartments, save for the filthy rich who could afford houses on the tar covered lands.  Life was hard, life was miserable.

  What happened? What happened to all those now `feel like oh-so-ambitious dreams`? I was not just robbed of them but I had unknowingly contributed to its downfall. I work in a factory, unwillingly but forcibly supporting and adding to the pollution of the already polluted, black stained world. I had to, to support my family, the people I love. I would not dream of flying now, not in this world and most definitely not in this sky. This Earth, it has not long left before it’s downfall, before it’s death.

"~Honey, you joining us for dinner?" my reverie was broken by a singsong voice I knew so well, the voice I have grown to love, one of my only sources of bliss nowadays, apart from my children.
I closed my eyes and sighed heavily "Yes darling, I’m coming"
  My sole desire was simple; I wanted to fly, to escape from this brute of a reality.
~RSN


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