21 Absolute Musts for Hipsters

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Jokes  |  House: Booksie Classic
This is just for fun. Don't worry if you fall into one of the categories as I do myself, though not all of them. Its fun to make fun of human nature Enjoy.

Submitted: April 12, 2011

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Submitted: April 12, 2011

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21 Ultimate MUSTS for Hipsters
  1. Never committ to anything for a long period of time i.e. when you like a band see them live only once and move onto another band preferably cd imports
 
  1. i.e.foreign words whenever possible, ex. Adieu, Ciao, Bella
 
3.travel whenever possible and always mention when youll be outta town…
 
  1. correct people whenever possible
 
  1. NEVER wait in line for a night club. ALWAYS be on the list and know the bouncer who you will great with a hug and kiss on the cheek.
 
  1. NEVER pay for drugs or alcohol. Other people do that…
 
  1. Frown on anything that isn’t the latest Apple or Windows program
 
  1. Secretly shop at consignment stores
 
  1. Never, absolutely never use the word spaghetti, from hereon it is called pasta.
 
  1. Mix high end clothes with low end.
 
  1.  Learn to speak Latin.
 
  1. Read only the NY times best seller list which you will use as conversation starters.
 
  1.  Dump friends who do not fit into your new lifestyle.
 
  1.  Always greet the waiter and chef at the restaurant, cordially. Call them by name if possible, make up names if you don’t already know them (which you should)
 
  1.  Date socially upward.
 
  1.  Take the opposite view. Ex. No, I thought that restaurant was a hog pit, or that band made my ears bleed. This will alienate others but help you to become a hipster.
 
  1.  Wear too much black.
 
  1.  Join an exclusive gym. Greet the owner with a hug whenever you see him/her!
 
  1.  Buy a foreign car you can’t afford. Only losers take transit.
 
  1.  Refer to everyone else as the “masses”.
 
  1.  Have only the latest in cellphone technology. Make sure people call all the time so you can interrupt conversations youre in.
 
  1.  Grow a mustache (men/women alike)


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