it was a moment, i wrote this awhile ago but maybe tru i think.

No sing, from the birds,

the sunlight seems bleak to day,

the scent of rosemary,with the aroma

scenting the air. The place where the charms

echo together, with a fascinating pattern of music

still, i feel dreary to day,

the music seems, not to cheer the soul to day,

the downward sparrow, from the envious of love,

down in the shadows of a chary dump,the place

where we live in are shallow hell, with amazement,

seems we fall to low, over lust, no pride to day,

cant seem to figure out the soul, lost in confusion and turmoil

in the essence of the moment wondering why the theme

became so chaotic so quick with the painful conclusion on the arising.

the most remarkable thing,with the heart plastered in pain,

we still find time to love.the sunshine cant bring the rain all the time,

so we march and still feel humble. even with the pain

still reminiscing inside, so the the heart seems to have its

much forgiveness at times,

in the essence we shall become true to are self.

we shall be complete in the episode, that we choose to love.

we feel the echo ever so clear,


Submitted: June 27, 2010

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Comments

Azaleas secrets

Its very beautiful.. some editing can add more melancholy charm to it. Why are you sad DP?

Mon, June 28th, 2010 9:13am

Author
Reply

yeah i fixed some of the spelling, not really sad just come out like that, the way see things i just write it down sometimes it has very little to with how i feel sometimes its people around me or sometimes its how i feel,or maybe something i read but i really dont take much from other writing i just admor from a distance.i could get a feeling from something, i read and than write something.but not very often.well i thank u for the comment and im sorry for all the misatakes in this poem sorry you had to read it like that should take more pride in that. thank you for the comment very much!

Mon, June 28th, 2010 5:47pm

palewriter

Nice way of putting things in perspective and seeing the truth behind the soul.

Numerous spelling and grammer errors but still a good use of imagination.

Mon, June 28th, 2010 2:37pm

Author
Reply

yes i seen them, well i fixed some of them thank u for the comment.means alot

Mon, June 28th, 2010 5:36pm

Capman

nice work

Wed, June 30th, 2010 4:58am

Author
Reply

thank you man i like your stuff i thing your a great story teller.

Wed, June 30th, 2010 2:06am

Christian Taylor

This is good poetry! Beautifully written and very descriptive. Keep up the good work!

Thu, July 1st, 2010 6:54pm

Author
Reply

thank you so much

Sat, July 3rd, 2010 1:57am

Sparkes

Very well done. This poem imaginative and emotional, and - as a reader - very easy to relate to. The way you see things and interpret them into words is extremely impressive. :)

Tue, July 6th, 2010 11:26am

Author
Reply

thank you one of my favorite comments of got thank you very i do see thing in a much different way i never really new i did but i read comment from anothers thy tend to have no ideal about what I'm talking about but that's OK, i never lay it out real basic if i did it would just not be me, i like the effect of a slap shot from a camera,from line to line i think thats why its hard for people to relate to but i like lots of imagine and to me its fun to write that way.

Tue, July 6th, 2010 8:33am

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