Fucking Emotions

Reads: 60  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 1

More Details
Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
Sometimes I worry I have to much caring in me.

Submitted: November 27, 2011

A A A | A A A

Submitted: November 27, 2011

A A A

A A A


 

You say, “I can tell you’re disappointed” and you don’t do anything to change it.

Yes I’m disappointed; and mad, and hurt, and on the verge of tears, and I honestly feel like my head will explode.

But I will just say yeah, I’m disappointed, and hope you don’t notice the tears welling in my eyes, and pray they don’t fall over.

Clench onto whatever is near like a lifeline till my knuckles go white.

I want to say so much more.

Tell you I’m scared for you, freaking out, and horrified, enraged, wondering how the hell this happened.

How I just want you to hug me and promise me you’ll stop,

But that won’t happen.

I’m tired of being everyone’s rock, I just want someone to cry on and tell me everything will be okay.

But I don’t have anyone to go to, so I’ll just hold my bear tight and cry to him.

I want to stop crying when I think of all of this.

I’m tired of being so strong, let me breakdown, please, I’m tired.

 I don’t want to be the crazy, happy, random, bubbly girl all the time.

I want to cry, it’s my only release.

But no one can know that I cry I don’t want them to think I’m weak.

Please stop, I know you won’t, but lie to my face and say you will, give me a false hope to go on.

Maybe if you saw the tears, the ones I don’t want you to see, the ones I cry silently in my bedroom when everyone’s asleep, the one’s that I never want you to know about though.

The one’s that are being shed for you,

Maybe then you’ll know the extent of how much I care.

How I hate that when I cry I can’t make a sound, because I don’t want anyone to hear.

How those tears physically hurt.

How I just want to scream, but I never can.

But break it down, I am weak.

I haven’t cried this hard since the divorce, what’s wrong with me.

Maybe I care too much.

Maybe I’m overreacting.

I just don’t want to feel like this.

I want to be strong, be happy,

Even if it might be a mask, because I’m falling apart, but no one can know.

God, I just want this nightmare to end.


© Copyright 2017 The Girl Whos Name Means Life. All rights reserved.

Add Your Comments:

Comments