The Boy and The Garden Fairy

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Fantasy  |  House: Review Chain


This book is about a boy who was very very curious and wanted to see a man who SUPPOSEDLY could plant magical flowers that produced children. Little did he know, the man wasn't making these
children someone else was.


 The Boy and the Garden Fairy

The Writer

 

Once upon a time, in a far away land called Judan, there lived a man who could plant flowers, and these magical flowers produced children. Everybody wondered how that could be, but no one dared to ask, for they didn’t want to ruin the magic of the flowers.

Though one day, a young man, blue eyes, light brown hair, brown coat, black pants, fancy shoes, went to see the man, belived to be in his fifties, plant his flowers, and what he saw was unbelievable! There was a garden fairy, she had on a green nature blouse, white ballerina-like shoes, and beautiful hazel eyes, helping the man grow the magic flowers. When the boy tried to run, but he found himself stuck, his legs wrapped tightly in vines. The  garden fairy saw him!

“You!” the fairy said to the boy, “if you wish to get out of these vines, you must promise to never tell a living soul about this.” And so the boy promised and was free.

Later the next morning, the young man tried and tried to keep his mouth shut, but finally he went up to his dad, dressed in a black silk robe and white pj-like pants, and told him everything he saw. But as soon as he finished he vanished. He then reappeared in the old man’s garden, and the garden fairy was there as well. “Boy,” said the fairy, “I told you not to tell! Now I’ll let you go as long as you WILL NOT tell another living soul. But if you tell someone again, I’m going to turn you into a tulip on the spot.” So soon after, the boy was freed and he went home.

However, Dad was feeling quite intrequied by his son's sight, so he hinted to his girls that their brother had seen the old man. So when the boy got home, his sisters pushed him to tell. When he couldn't take it anymore, he told. Nothing happened for a few moments. "Ha ha! I'm still human!"No sooner had he finished, he turned into a tulip.

 


Submitted: November 05, 2017

© Copyright 2020 ShaunAstorio. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:

Comments

chica96

hi again,
I see that you've added descriptions which is nice to see. I liked the description of the girl, very lovely. There were a few grammatical errors. For example, in the last line of the first par, "the people didn't want to ruin the magic flowers" I think what you meant here was that the "people didn't want to ruin the magic of the flowers". If they knew the hows and whys, then the flowers would not seem so magical. There were a couple of other errors that I'm sure you can pick up. Another one is when the boy's nerves system came to its end. I think you either mean "the end of his nervous system" or to put it another way, "when he couldn't take it anymore."

I still don't know why th dad felt sad and why this would then make him tell his girls that the boy has a secret. also, he also knows the secret and wasn't warned so could he also tell them himself?

This story has improved since I last read it, but there are still some improvements to make. But like before, when I first read the story, I like the idea, very imaginative and creative. One more note, "in a magical land of Asia"-how about coming up with a name for the land?

Tue, November 7th, 2017 3:37am

vampiregirl53

great story, you're a very creative writer.

Fri, November 17th, 2017 8:31pm

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