Fourth Situation Squared

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
The fourth situation squared
is the time when I turned up
and you were not there.

Submitted: June 15, 2010

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Submitted: June 15, 2010

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The fourth situation squared
is the time when I turned up
and you were not there.
It's when I waited on the edge of the cliff face
leaning
waiting
thinking
not thinking
not really knowing where was up
where was down
only vaguely recognising the here
only knowing the nowness of this moment by my pulsating blood.
And really
really
feeling lost beyond your comprehension.

The fourth situation squared
was sitting on that platform
freezing with the ham and cheese sandwich.
A good choice amongst no choice
a choiceless wonder amongst the free-living.

I'm not too sure when the fourth situation squared will start to be the fifth or sixth
or when it will diminish, becoming the square root
because life seems to deal me the fourth situation squared
the dizzying
rumbling
whimpering times
when i cannot see for dust on the unnamed road.

The fourth situation squared came screaming at me in the night
when i couldn't breathe for the shapes in my mind
the sounds in my consciousness
that never really existed
calm
calm
lights on yet they stay off
blind in the night in the room with the fright.

Sometime the fourth situation squared will break me
some say it will make me but i remain the cynic
why
for the life of me
would i enjoy it
the wretching and the sighing.

I will try and avoid the fourth situation squared
stand without falling
whilst everyone around me whirls with their square root of nine situations
their only momentary glitches
not the life-long consignment
to this.

I will grip on
told tight
wide-eyed
determination-filled
don't fall
don't fall
keep me up
leave me standing
own two feet
two plus two
hands holding on
four without the square
just four
me
holding on.


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