The Girl Scout and the Dramatic Teen

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic

Sometimes, Girl Scouts can get a bit hasty. But try ditching them on your front porch. IT'S PRETTY VIOLENT. lol

"Katelyn, come down here and do the dishes, already!" My mom yelled at me from the bottom of the stairs. I groaned. "Can't you see I really don't feel like IT!?" I hollered back and typed rude things about normal people on my blog, My So Called "Life".

This world is such a CHEAT! Everyone is so joyful and....happy. Ugh! My mom interrupted my cynical thoughts quickly.

"I'm not giving you a choice, Katelyn! Come do these dishes or I'LL take you shopping!" I gasped. Everyone knows I absolutely hate shopping. With my mom, no less. "FINE!" I stomped down the wooden staircase and entered the blue kitchen. My mom was cooking pasta, and by the looks of it, the pasta was burnt. Blech!

"Why can't you just be normal, Kate? And you wonder why you can't get a boyfriend! Look at yourself!" She grabbed my shoulders and turned me towards the mirror in the hallway.

The girl scowling at me was dressed in all black, obviously. She was pretty, but covered in black and eyeliner. The woman next to her as "tsking" her pink tongue in disgust, shaking her brown bob sullenly. I turned away and turned off the stove-top.

"You know mom, you could turn off the pasta when it's finished." She laughed it off and pointed towards the black dish-washer. I opened it up and stepped away. An array of clear steam flooded the kitchen, which was already overheated.

"Kate, your father and I are going to be attending a funeral tomorrow. Would you be fine staying here? Alone?" I nodded quickly and said, "Sure. Who'd you kill this time, mom?" She laughed. "I wouldn't hurt a fly." She gave me a mocking look and I laughed, too. What about that fly the other day..." Mom laughed. "Aside from him." I looked up at her curiously. "Him?" She shrugged. "It looked like a guy to me."

Right then, my father walked in, set down his briefcase, and hugged my mom. He turned to me.

"Why do you wear so much makeup, Alyssa?" My jaw dropped and I realized that. I shut it quickly.

My mom spoke up quietly. "John, that's Katelyn. Alyssa.....passed away, remember, honey?" He composed himself briefly and frowned. "Oh. Hey, Katelyn." I turned away to put up some glasses in the white cabinet.

It was pretty obvious my father liked Alyssa more. She was blonde, an all-American cheerleader, and got great grades. They started to annoy me more than usual when she died in a car crash 7 months ago.

"What's for dinner, hon?" My father took off his winter coat and sat down at the brown, circular table by the breakfast nook. I joined him when the dishes were finally taken care of.

"Pasta and bread. Why?" She stared at his blank expression. "Oh, no reason. Just wondering, sweetheart." She smiled warmly and walked over with three plates. I pushed the one designated for me away. It looks awful.

"No thanks, mom. It looks great and all, but..." She grimaced briefly. "I get it, Katelyn. No biggie." She looked hurt, though. My dad started digging in. He choked on a noodle clump on his fork. "It's.......great, honey. Thanks." But by the look on dad's scrunched up face, it must've been pretty darn nasty.

"So John, she knows about the big plans tomorrow." He nodded while eating the hard breadstick. "I promise to take care of the house, blah, blah, blah..." My mom smiled. "Great, Katelyn."


I woke up with a jump. I heard my mom's muffled shuffles throughout the house and the smell of freshly brewed coffee tickled my nose. I smiled. So far, so good. I turned over in the black comforter and snuggled up. Talk about sleeping in. It was still Winter Break, so school wouldn't be an issue for a while.

My parents footsteps intruded my dark room. I could hear their whispers through the blankets and pillows over me.

"Don't wake her, John. We'll just leave a note on the fridge." I heard him agree. Their footsteps faded. I heard the door slam and lock closed. I jumped up and dressed in some black sweats.

Once downstairs and in the living room, I turned on the Plasma TV. Some news channel blurred on and I flipped to MTV. Turning up the volume, I jumped into the kitchen for some coffee and eggs. But I heard the doorbell ring. I unwillingly got up to get it.

"Yeah?" I saw a little girl scout-brownie, maybe-peer up at me. She had a red wagon full of cookies. There was a blue clipboard in her pudgy hands. "Would you like to purchase some cookies, ma'am?" I shook my head and shut the door. The bell rang again.

"What?" She happily spoke the same words again. I shook my head. "I SAID TO BUY SOME COOKIES!" The little girl threw a huge tantrum on my front porch. I shut the door again, quicker this time. The little girl scout banged on the door furiously. "BUY MY COOKIES!" She screamed louder and louder, like a crazy tantrum/chant. It was so irritating! I walked outside to confront the little beast. Gosh, I thought, crazy child, where is you mother?!

"I do not wan't to but your cookies, you beast!" I put my hands on my narrow hips and waited. To my utter surprise, she started throwing cookies at me. I dodged ten boxes in a row, atleast before getting hit with some Shortbread boxes. You haven't felt pain until you get chucked in the head with Girl Scout Cookies.

Nobody was around to watch me being assaulted by a 7 year old. "Ouch!" She jumped on my back-which I have no idea how she did it-and started pulling my braids.

Soon, I gave up. "Fine! I WILL BUY YOUR COOKIES! Just, stop." She got down gracefully and had me give her cash and sign the papers on the clipboard. "Thank you, ma'am." She trotted away. Without handing me my cookies. In other days, I would have chased the little brat. Today? I walked back inside to get an ice-pack. "Ow, ow, ow, ow!" I squealed........

"Just a dream, Katelyn." I said this to myself and got up. My parents already left. I turned on MTV and heard the doorbell ring. I freaked out, remembering that wretched dream last night.

"Would you like to buy some cookies, ma'am?" I pulled my wallet out and gave her all my cash. "Yes! Just please, please don't hurt me." I watched the little girl hand me 12 boxes, and trot away down the street.

Ever since then, I always buy girl scout cookies.

Submitted: March 21, 2009

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Add Your Comments:



So funny.
But I think that there should be an ending and less of a detailed starting. Like, I thought that the funeral was going to have more to do with it. THIS WAS SO GOOD< THOUGH!

Sun, March 22nd, 2009 8:21am

Reply, what do you mean by funeral, though?

Sun, March 22nd, 2009 7:40am


This is hilarious!! "BUY MY COOKIES!!" That just made me crack up!!(:

Mon, April 6th, 2009 3:47am


lmao I know! My best bud and I thought of it while watching Degrassi at like three in the morning. lol

Glad u liked it. =P

Mon, April 6th, 2009 4:10pm

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