Enough!

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
A girl is stuck in an abusive relationship a boy named Connor might be the only one who can save her.

Submitted: January 01, 2015

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Submitted: January 01, 2015

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Enough!

 

‘’You need not call the devil, he’ll come without calling’’ –amish proverb-

 

The rain poured over a small girl in a small lane. She was just standing there crying her face covered in bruises, her arms covered in fresh new cuts. Blood trickles down her swollen mouth, she shuddered. Behind her was a figure, a tall silhouette watching her……….

Deep down inside i knew he wasnt good for me. His anger his fury i feel his hands grabbing me and everytime he did that i felt that he was going to kill me. He will but i couldnt let him go. The four walls held up a broken home, imprisoning a broken girl. You should ve seen the look in his eyes… his eyes.. so beatiful and terrifying at the same time. Deep down inside i knew that he didnt care about me. He could push me off the stairs and walk over me. So i was trying to make him happy and in his eyes i failed in that in every way. I told myself i aint gonna be his bitch! Yet i still am. My life is hell but suprisingly sometimes heaven. Because of Connor actually. Connor…. That boyish look on his face gets me everytime. That smile, the green eyes… how he always made me smile. When hes gone and im left alone with HIM happiness seemed only a dream. I cant sleep, afraid hes gonna shoot that bullet through my head. I wanna escape… i have to but how?

Wednesday july 7th

Dear diary,

Connor and i were at the park. Even though it was summer i was wearing long sleeves yet he didnt seem to mind and didnt question it. ‘’and whats your favorite movie?’ he asked. I smiled:”Django.’’ ‘’that movie is bad ass’’ Connor took a cookie. Cookie monster! i said playfully. He threw cookie at me. Cookie fight! And there we go cookies were flying everywhere. I fell on the ground and i couldnt stop laughing. Gotya! Connor was now tickling me and damn i was begging for him to stop. But how much i said  stop he didnt. And i was there on the ground laughing like a retard… so much joy! How did he do that!? Making me laugh every single time! I have a great friend a great friend named Connor.

Thursday july 8th

Dear diary,

Connor brought me home today and he insisted to come in! So i stood there helplessly opening the door. And there he was standing in front of me and behind me was Connor. It was tense but Connor didnt seem to feel it instead he smiled and was chatting happily. That brave bastard entering my home like it was a fun house, how did he do that? And talking to him like he wasnt a demon straight from hell like i wasnt his prisoner. He saw him like.. well as my boyfriend i guess. ..  even though Connor was chatting with him happily Hayden didnt seem to be pleased with this company. He only was nodding. I was standing right behind Connor if there was gonna be an outburst… i thought it was safe. I was trembling cause i was sure he was gonna ask me what i was doing with Connor! After a while Connor wanted to  leave! Leave! How could he…! But he doesnt know and he never will! When he was gone i just stood there by the door and Hayden he was there.. i felt his hand hit my face. I was about to cry. I tried not too because that ll be weak! ‘’how dare you do this to me’’ he said. He sounded like a venomous snake i swear. He raised his voice and threw me on the ground. I didnt feel bad i was used to it. i hate to be weak. He made me weak… but everythings gonna turn up fine right? In the end? What does it all matter? What do i mean to him what do i mean to Connor? As long  there is Connor. Im gonna make it.

Sunday July 11th

Dear diary,

Im a liar, im bad, im nothing less than an ant on which he could stand on without knowing it. im a speck of dust, im a cheater, im ugly, im worthless. No one cares about me. All those things that he says to me are they true? Am i really nothing without him? Am i better off without Connor? He told me to never talk to him the only hope of happiness, he told me i couldnt see Connor anymore. No! i said but than he looked at me in a very deadly way. Why? I almost whispered. Hes up to no good Hayden said. He ? Connor didnt mean no harm! Your not going to see him again! Thats not fair i yelled at him in my head. But in my head ive killed him more than twice! It really isnt fair. He is so mean! Why is he so mean to me! What did i ever do to this guy! How can i love him when he doesnt allow me to. Why is he the reason of my pain my fear my anger! Why is he so obnoxious! I want to love Hayden but i cant! He simply wants me to hurt me. And only hurt me. I can feel it! i cant run i cant do anything and i cant see him. Why did he say this now and not two days ago? Why is my  happiness poison to him! Why am i here? Where do i go? Without Connor who is there for me? Why is everything against me? Why me!? On the other hand why not me? Right? Should i see Connor, Should i tell him this? I honestly dont think so. Im gonna see Connor even though this must be in secret. I want my reason to smile. And i wont let anyone take him from me!

Monday july 12th

Dear diary,

He took away my phone and some other priveleges like im a kid. Any thing that gave me a chance to contact Connor was gone. Im in prison. A living hell! Im staring for days at the window looking at the happy people passing by.. smiling and laughing. I thought of Connor. How nice it was to talk to him, how good he was for me….this is the plan: at 23:00 pm Hayden will go out like always. Im getting a hammer and then i break that big window and there i go to Connor. Why didnt i do this before? Well think about it. Hayden will never ever let me walk out that door without putting up a fight so if i get out and leave him he ll hunt me down and kill me without hesitation. ‘’snapping every bone and cut it all to pieces it would be long and painful then your gone and i promise you they ll never find you and if they do you wont look human with the 100 stabwounds you ll have i warn you do not disobey me! Never’’ Hayden quotes. Those words haunted my life and i need to leave . i need to breathe… before he left he hit me several times and i dont know why? There is blood on the ground and i have to sanitize it again. Its like sanitising a crime scene which is technically true. Im moments away of happiness or an everlasting horror scene. 

The window shattered and i went into the depths of the night.. its raining. I put up my umbrella in the small lane. Im looking around its  eerie and it scares me. I feel a presence this presence is so close i hear it breathing. Run! I m running for my life and the presence its getting near me! I hear it running. Running behind me and it wont stop. I see headlights coming at me and it wont stop..

Its dark i cant see.. i feel something is grabbing my hand…

Where what? I said only slowly realising there is person standing next to my bed. It is a handsome looking guy  looking at me with no expression on his face, he was just there staring at me and holding my hand! What happened?. I dont remember…. He smiles at me. Wow how gorgeous. You had an accident, its me, Hayden your boyfriend. Omg he s my boyfriend this handsome guy? I wasnt expecting that and he looks so sweet, what a cutie. Damn that smile… he is explainig to me everything, how we were so in love how happy we were how he was sad when he found out i got hit by a car and apparently i knew the driver and he wanted to hurt me now he did only i survived! The name is Connor.. and Connor is my enemy! I dont remember him but i hate him already, i hate him so much! Hayden was smiling at me that beautiful smile wow..

Monday july 26th

Dear diary

 Hayden gave me a present a diary! The sweatheart. Hayden helped me alot to understand myself, to get to know myself better and it worked! I now know myself and there are a view things i always told him: i love you and i hate Connor. Aparently i said his name like it was cursed and now i do it again. How dare he trying to kill me! Hayden told me he was dangerous how he was corrupted. How he treated me like nothing while he pretended that he was my friend! There are alot of these people trying to seperate me and him but it never worked. Ill always love Hayden and i love him till death.. i guess i have to get used to writing a diary ive never done this before.

Tuesday july 27th

Dear diary,

The Connor fellow knocked on my door asking if i was allright he seemed worried but i know its fake, he gave me flowers and i threw it at his face.  He looked shocked. ‘’its funny isnt it i just heard now that you got hit by a car like 2 weeks ago you never answered my calls and now your mad at me whats wrong? Is it wrong to be concerned about your safety?’’ i told him its his fault and that Hayden told me what he was doing and i shut the door like a boss. How can someone even try to come back to you after they hit you with a car! We dont need people like him and i certainly dont need him!

Connor

 

It just doesnt seem right. Why would she do this to me?  We were  best friends but  it never seemed right. Like the long sleeves in summer it sounded like she was hiding something and how she never allowed me to go inside her house and i dont think shes so clumsy to fall on things. There is something not right. Should i be alarmed? She always complained about Hayden and now hes a saint? Wow! I should talk to him.

Im sitting face to face with Hayden he was just talking about nonsense. He talked about everything except about his own girlfriend! Like she didnt exist. ‘’why is she hating me all of a sudden?’’ i asked like immediately and to him it sounded like a bomb just exploded he looked kinda angry when i questioned him about the behaviour. He denied everything and i can see hes nervous, every answer that came out of his mouth didnt had to do with anything i just asked. Something is certainly not up. Im going to find out what it is.

She always kept a diary i know that maybe i can find it. Hayden is gone for a while now is my chance. i feel like james bond when i carefully went upstairs. I found her room now the diary! I checked the pillow the cover the sheets, the closet and i finally found it in her drawer. It didnt make sense! She just wrote in it like two times and both times she wrote how much she loved Hayden and how much she hated me? It doesnt sound nothing like her! But the date this is a new one! I will keep this one and i will find the old one! The search didnt take long i looked even further and there under the mattress was another diary! Damn its locked! Now i gotta find the keys…. Connor! I turned around and Hayden was behind me! Are you lost? No most definetely not im just searching for a pen so i can write in my agenda. Ill leave! I slowly went past the eyeballing Hayden then im running and so is he! He is chasing me all the way to my car and i left leaving angry cursing Hayden behind me.

Me

 

This is unbelievable! Connor stole my diary! Hayden was chasing him to get it back i saw him chasing him. Connor had a different car! Nice trick of him but i dont fall for  them! Im going to get it back. Why would he ever steal my diary how did he know that it meant so much to me? Im going to find the answers. I arrived and i knocked at his door and yelled in front of it too, damn im mad. Ive never been so mad before! I opened the door and he hugged me! I tried to wrestle myself out of his grip but he wont let go! I screamed i yelped! This guy is nuts. He dragged me inside his house and tied me up. I fought i cried and i knew it was useless. I gave up. When i calmed down he was reading a diary but it isnt mine!  It isnt mine at all! It only says how much i wanted to leave Hayden and wanting to be with him! Liar i screamed. ‘’but you wrote it look its your handwriting and look at the date!’’ how could he be so calm? I looked at it in disbelief. ‘’dont you remember? Dont you remember cookie monster the picnics the teasing and all the rides home and the long talks? The car you said that hit you was red and mine is grey as you can see.’’ I cried cause i remember! The flashbacks! All the lies i blindly believed in, all this time Hayden is the enemy and im pushing the great friend away! It suprised me that he didnt gave on me while others had! I couldnt take it i dont want to go back. Never again.

Tuesday october 19th

Dear diary

I stayed at Connors place for awhile then i went back and this time happy cause Hayden is locked up and he aint gonna get out for a long long time. I found myself back and i found my friend back and maybe.. maybe we ll be more than friends. Who knows.. cant believe Hayden read my diary! Thats why he was so angry and that s probably why he followed me that night and that he knew where to find him but now its over and im glad that everythings allright. I learned that everything goes allright  in the end. When its not allright than its not the end.

Today is my birthday! Connor invited me to dinner for my birthday so.. write ya later!

The end


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