My Name is Mat; you can call me that, Py, Canada or TheManWithManyWalls and today I’ve decided to write down my life for all my booksie commuters to read. You know what they say after all eh, sharing is caring.
I live by a code set by myself, I have rules that I live by and here they are in order of importance:
1) Do not play around with the words ‘I love you’ those words if used truthfully can be as caressing and beautiful as a freshly bloomed rose or as deadly and life ending as two edged dagger in the heart. Do not gest with these words, do not speak them idly... you better mean these words with all your mind, body and soul when they come out of your mouth.
2) Never hit a girl, not even in gest... pretty self explanatory.
3) We live in the texting era, it is important to have your cell phone on and on you at all times. You could miss an important call or text, what if a friend needed help and you decided to leave your phone home. Sometimes people jump the gun and presume you ignoring them, sometimes a simple I’m busy will reassure them... just food for thought that’s all.
4) If you know the truth could hurt and is not necessary for the situation don’t tell it... don’t lie but sometimes it’s best not to pour salt into a wound.
5) Choose every word you use carefully; a misconstrued word can turn a compliment into an insult, a friendship into a war.
6) Try to stay neutral, don’t choose a side because sometimes both sides need help and if you’re on one side how can you help the other? Everyone deserves help and if you can offer it you should, no matter what side they are on.
7) Everyone should smile; if you can’t solve their problem the least you can do is be there for them and make them smile and just make them see that tomorrow might be better.
8) VENT! Vent your feelings any way you can, either write stories as most of you booksie people do or run, or punching bags or talk to a close friend. Don’t keep it in you, it will hurt others when its unleashed but it will hurt you more.
9) Everything is ok in moderation, so go ahead and eat that piece of cake or drink that beer or smoke that joint... just do it in moderation.
10) It don’t matter if you see life as half full or half empty; just add the other half and it becomes full no matter what your perspective. That translates to have and put yourself first from time to time... its not being selfish!
Everyone has events that lead to the person they are now, events that shape us and create our fears and our habits and our life, here are mine:
1) When I was a toddler my parents visited a friend that had a pet dog; they were talking amicably and I decided to do what toddlers do best, wander. I decided to visit the dog, it was eating and I reached for its bowl. It nearly bit my face off but my dad pulled me away... ever since I have a fear of dogs I don’t know... but once I get to know a dog I love em.
2) Up to the age of 2 I couldn’t speak of lick of English; my parents were bilingual but wanted to conserve the language... fortunately in my stubborn way I found a way to learn. My parents had neighbours that were Mennonites, cool people and they came and talked about God and stuff. I didn’t get any of it but I did learn English words; I watched tv and listened to music and radio and listened to the bible studies. So a combination of classic rock, sesame street, barney and religious preaching resulted in me learning English.
3) In 3rd grade my life changed forever; I could already read in french but never got interested but I learnt to read in English that year. I grew in love with reading; I loved how they used words to create worlds, and how unlike television I could imagine the world any way I wanted it. I began to write stories, I went through phases of non stop reading to non stop writing. That year I became as you know me now; TheManWithManyWalls.
4) In 7th grade my parents decided to change religion from Catholics to Baptists; I didn’t understand why. Then one day they had to do the ceremony where we say a bunch of prayers and my parents didn’t want to subject us to that; the school said fine, if they don’t want to they can sit in the middle of the circle. My brothers did... I just toughed it out and said the damn prayer; moral of the lesson being that religion sucks.
5) In 10th grade I met my friend France, that’s her real name I kid you not... she was the first person to truly understand me and accept me for who I was. She made me realize that maybe not everyone was out to get me; that there was good in this world. The importance of this moment being I formed a permanent friendship that could never be shaken, a friend I will trust forever.
6) In 11th grade I visited my friends; we went out in the woods to have fun and hike and stuff plus we had to cut wood for the wood stove. We took a break and went climbing up a mountain-ish ridge; I watched my friends climb up with difficulty and crossed my arms and laughed to myself; looking at the right where the path seemed easier, shortcut. Well I started to climb up; I slipped so I grabbed a boulder... the boulder came out of the ground. It rolled after me and rolled over my legs... I didn’t break anything but I learnt that day that shortcuts aren’t always best.
7) September 16 2009 I met the girl I am now deeply in love with, upon that day I know I fell in love with her before I even knew I did. She has changed my life for the best, I want to be more than I can be and I want her to be happy forever, I love her.
8) I joined the army, its not as bad as people seem to think it is; the screaming isn’t bad once you get used to it and the discipline is good. The army made me realize what I was lacking in my life; I wasn’t social; in a platoon you have to make friends with people you never would talk to. Moral of the lesson is never to close my mind; that everyone has the potential of being a friend and that everyone deserves the chance and the effort.
9) That girl I met September 16 2009, I decided to tell her exactly how I felt despite my fears of rejection and found out she loved me. I asked her to be my gf and she said yes, she loved me all along and I was too afraid to tell her I had loved her, but all this time we had loved each other. That day I became hers; I belong to her in both mind, body and soul and wouldn’t want it any other way, I love her so much.
We all have dreams someday and here is my dream of what I would like to have in my life in the future:
I’d love to move to a nice country place with my gf, we could breathe in the fresh air and enjoy the natural scenery that whatever deity you believe in has provided for us. I want to open a Canadian style bookstore and sell Canadian food, bring a bit of Canada into the USA. I hope to have children perhaps, only 2 because 1 would get lonely and 3 is a handful. I want to see the world, to travel and to not miss an experience, I want to live life.
I have many fears and some are funny and quaint and some are serious but here they all are:
1) Bees, if a bee flies in my path I will stop and wait for it to get out so I can continue... they terrify me.
2) Dogs... as you read above.
3) Clowns, I can never tell if they happy or sad because of their artificial smiles.
4) Old people, I’m not sure why but when I see old people I shudder and feel scared inside... perhaps it is a fear of death but I think it’s a fear of growing old.
5) Being alone, I don’t want to be alone in this world... everyone needs someone and I don’t know what I’d do if I only had me to watch over myself. I need my friends, I need my gf, I need my family... without them I am lost.
6) Heights, I can climb up real easy but it’s the going down that’s hard... or should I say that sometimes going down is too easy.
7) Death in sleep, when I die I want to die painfully and I want it to take time, I want to know that I’m going to die. I don’t want to go to bed with plans for the next day and die with my plans unfulfilled; at least if I know I dying I will be ready to accept my failure.
If you wish to know more you can leave a comment with your question and I will gladly answer it, to you my fellow booksie inhabitants and various non registered users I am an open book, just tell me what you want to read and I’ll show it to you. This is TheManWithManyWalls signing out.
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