The Cruelty Of Unrequited Love
Poem by: ThePseudoMe
Reads: 533 | Likes: 0 | Shelves: 0 | Comments: 1
I can draw you in my mind
I can feel you in my Heart
I can smell your sweet perfume
But cruelty keeps you from my touch
I can see you standing by me
I can almost hold your hand
I can see the sunshine in youe eyes
But cruelty steals your kiss
I can taste the kisses on my lips
I can feel your soft caress
I can feel our bodies become one
But cruelty steals the dreams
I can see the child, our joy
I can see his mother in him
I can see the Love in your eyes
But cruelty, again, steps in
I can see us old together
I can see our Great Grandchildren
I can see us as in Love as the day we met
But cruelty lost you forever
Submitted: April 02, 2007
© Copyright 2022 ThePseudoMe. All rights reserved.
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EdwardJBradleySr
ThePseudoMe:
Tue, April 3rd, 2007 4:01amWell written. Quite good theme and treatment of same.
Gave it a "5".
Think you may be posting too many poems at one time. Write them at any pace or speed you wish. But to build a readership it will work better for you to post one every few days or week. Sometimes, even longer time intervals can work better for you. People have only so much time and will have many other people to read.
It is more important to concentrate on quality than on rushing to post everything you may have done. People will get a better sense of you if allowed to develop their opinions over time.
Reading and commenting on the work of others, along the way, is part of the working relationship with others as well. It is not easy and takes time.
Just my opinion.
Happy trails,
Ed Bradley.
Author
Reply
Thanks for the advice. I do have a large selection at the moment.
Tue, April 3rd, 2007 1:48am