I think one of the hardest parts of “growing up” is learning and encountering how the people around you change. There will come time where someone you used to be so incredibly close with becomes a total stranger; let it be a bestfriend, family member or worse, a lover. Now in the beginning it wont be all that bad, you’ll come to pick up on things they never used to do, habits they said they’d “never” get into, they’ll hang out with people they used to bitch about, and act like nothings changed, it will leave you wondering “why”? You can try to talk them out of it, help them see clearly what they are doing, but they won’t budge, by this point it’s already too late. Helping them doesn’t make it any better either, yes they are hypocrites, but they’re at the point where they couldn’t care less. Again you will ask yourself “why?” Why would he or she do this? Why don’t they know better? Why can’t they listen to me? Why don’t they care? Trying to help them only makes it harder for yourself, but you do it anyway because you care about this person, and you make yourself believe that there is a probable cause for their change of heart. You know what, maybe there is, but not once in all my hypothesis have I came to a full stop conclusion. You’ll think maybe its family related, rebellion against their parents perhaps. Or maybe there is something going on in their life that you don’t know about, possibly school or work related. But then the part that makes you feel the shittiest is when you think it’s you. That YOU’RE the reason for their change, maybe YOU forced them to take control, or maybe YOU were holding back who they truly were. But then you realise they don’t love you enough to even explain themselves, they don’t care that you’re hurting trying to figure it out, they don’t even have the decency to show you respect or give you notice, they just change. At this point you have a few options; Forget the person completely and remove them from your mind and life, continue to struggle trying to maintain what you once had with them, or accept them for the person they have become and try to accommodate their differences. I’ll let you know now that none of those selections are efficient or simple, they are full of pain and confusion but in the end bestow wisdom. See what you don’t realise is that when you deal with someone you care about changing, you also change. It may be for the worse, you may have trust issues, you might follow in the footsteps of the person therefore submerging yourself to their level, or you may not be able to move on and accept the love you deserve. On the upside you could find yourself ridden of a burden, ready to begin fresh, it could leave you with dignified experience in decision-making and the ways in which you handle situations. In most cases you will become a mix of both, you will be changed for the better and the worse, and now all the people that care about you will have to find their own way to deal with that.
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