Tragic Birthday Party

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
The worst birthday party ever.

Submitted: July 15, 2012

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Submitted: July 15, 2012



"Mum, Mum, Mum! It's my birthday party today!" screamed an excited young child running and jumping around, "Are you excited?" replied the mother, "No, that's why I'm running around jumping and screaming, fucking stupid woman" muttered the young boy. The young boy knew that this was his day, and not only was he a year older, a year wiser and more intelligent, but this year he had a bouncy castle coming. He knew that his friends had heard he was having a bouncy castle, and the young boy was adamant that he was going to be the first to enjoy the beautiful, adrenaline rushed first bounce of the wondrous and majestic castle. No snotty nosed little twonk was going to take that away from him!

Mum was in the kitchen making food, Dad was outside setting up the party, The boy was inside debating whether to help or, stay in his room looking out the window hoping for a glimpse of the hot next door neighbour, who usually left for work around this time. He stayed in his room. Eventually the neigbour left, a little later than usual, also wearing a little more skirt than usual, something was up. Today, from the moment he woke up, the boy had a strange feeling in his stomach. He threw up. The young boy was devastated, he couldn't believe he was ill, especially on the day that his awe inspiring bouncy castle was coming. He decided to try and sleep it off.

He woke up to the sound of laughter and chatter, after a strange dream where he had been eaten by a very large Gordon Brown slug (who is now a very respected member of the UN education board, not the slug part, just Gordon Brown). The young child shot to his feet and looked out of the window, the bouncy castle was there! From the child's quick estimations the castle would be ready in about 24seconds, and there was not a chance on earth that he would be beaten to that first orgasmic bounce. He darted down the stairs as fast as he could, raced through the kitchen sending jam sandwiches and little fairy cakes with a small blob of coloured icing flying. The boy burst out of the back door he could see the castle was ready for him, and he was ready to take that castle on a long, breath-taking, exhausting adventure.

The boy braced himself. He had been waiting for this moment his whole life. He ran, skipped and jumped, then fell and banged his head. He never got to go on that bouncy castle. And from that day on the boy has never quite been the same. Often the boy thinks back to that day, and of how the next door neighbour had too much skirt on, he knows now that he should've known something was not quite right. 

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