Panic -

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Memoir  |  House: Booksie Classic
How it all started...

Submitted: September 16, 2009

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Submitted: September 16, 2009

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Life. You've got the world at your fingertips. No pressure, just constant happiness.
Being so fulfilled with life at that point, that there isn't enough time in one day to do all
you'd like to do, feels like you just can't get enough, until one day. One day, your head
spins, and somehow ends up rewinding, and going out of control. You sit down on the
local bench downtown, and try to catch your breath that seems nonexistant. After dry
heaving, you let it all out. I'm dehydrated, I'm fine. You notice your vision is blurred, your
hands are numb, toes are numb, and your extremely weak. What's going on? How could
this happen to me. I have the perfect life. So you get a lift home to try and sleep it off.
You start the next day as a new day. Just having a vague memory of what happened the
day before. Take some vitamins, down some water and your good. Only to have the same,
god awful unexplainable feeling happen again, this time weeks later. Same onset of nausea,
shortness of breath, and a feeling like you are literally, going to die. A trip to the emergency
room rules out nothing. Not to mention no treatment or care other than lie down and drink some
water. It's nothing serious, I'm only 15. So, being a self help type guy, I try to research the
symptoms. Internet browsing for hours on end. Found the problem. I had experienced a panic
attack. Most definitely, the absolute worst feeling any human can have. If you had to compare,
100 percent pain in any area would be better than having even a mild panic attack. What triggers
them? Move on, try to forget. Well, didn't happen like that. You now live your what used to be
a perfect life you thought, now knowing you have a weakness, and one you can't control nor
improve. Wake up every morning knowing in the back of your mind you've got an issue, and
it could happen at any moment. Ignore events, stay home, or stay local. It's not the way to
live. Ever since then...life's been different, very different.


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