Paynes Of Glass

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic

A short descrpitive piece about the torment and loneliness thats she had to endure... please raate and let me know what you think ~chloe~

 

Authors Note:

I hope this is a good descriptive piece of writing, although personally I don’t think it is very good, although quite short I think I have used my extensive vocab to the best of my abilities and added a lot of description. Sorry if the formatting gets messed up blame booksie, and any grammatical errors or spelling I apologize for. But please rate or leave comments on your opinion or view and criticism is definitely needed. I hope you like it and if you have any questions feel free to ask.

~Thumper~

 

Payne of Glass

A world through a window is clouded and framed, the cut out picture and wasted beauty from the glass hinders my wandering eyes. Every detail i captured in motion, the waving of dainty flowers in the slow summer breeze dancing and swaying to an infectious melody, the white whisps of clouds that travel the shy indigo sky, burning amber sun, setting in the not near distance. The rays of light stream through the panes of glass and caress my face with such delicate warmth, that the light itself seemed to cling to my graying deathly skin, like irridesant gold glitter, thousands of tiny little kisses that seem so beautiful, magical and enticingly enchanting. Eruptions of laughter and joy, bounce off walls and linger in the stale dusty air, trapping me like a mellow butterfly, wings flutter silently under the watch of glass bell jar, screaming for its stolen freedom. Silhouettes and shadows of forgotten belongings stain the walls in stolen memory and lost recollections. The petite darkening outline of my old dressing table still remains and i remember the way the flowered lining of dainty chartreuse forest vines and delicate pink rose and amaryllis twist and entwine the elegant ivory legs.

The mirror, reflects such beauty of its own design but now cracked and broken, I delicately trace the shadowed outline of the mirror, the pieces of dark, vague shards of glass deepen into detrimental cracked imperfections, that had long awaited the tentive attention, it had died without. The emptiness of the room, begged to be filled with what it had missed the most, the love that made its deepest foundations awaken with its liberation of life. The walls seemed to breath around me, silently contracting with ghostly movements, trapping me closer and closer to the seclude window, looking out the twilight sky now was inky black and dotted with glittering silver stars, as if the angels themselves were crying for me, and nothing but the darkness remained around them, eating away at any light that remained, both pure and divine. I sink to the floor in desperation and cling to myself, crying out to the lord to heed my suffering, for so long I’ve had to endure this pained and lonely life, and at what cost?, only to descend into nearing madness, to have my sanity taken away from me when i had nothing but?. Numbness seemed to fall over the pain and lulled me into a hushed slumber. Pure white light burst through every wall, and the window breaking through each pane so forcefully it was as if virtuous god like hands had destroyed the prison walls of my vivacity, saving me. I plunged deeper and deeper into the comforting uncertainty that awaited me, falling forever but feeling freedom at its best, and at that moment I knew that my prayers and cries had finally been answered that the peace, my heart, mind, body and soul had ached for was given to me in all its astounding glory. That the panes of glass had been broken and I had finally been set free.

By Chloe John :)

 

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Submitted: April 08, 2012

© Copyright 2021 unoticedchloeeee. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:

Comments

Andrew Thomas

Thank you for leading me to this wonderful piece of art! You have the best way of describing, I felt like I was there! You have such a way with words and are truely talented! Keep up the good work! I'm kinda new to booksie and am trying to get some critiques on my new novel "The Depths", so if you could return the favor and either check out the sneak peak, chapter one, or chapter two, that would be so helpful in the process of improving my writing. Again, great work, and so much talent!
I give your story a 10/10
--Andrew

Sun, April 8th, 2012 2:48pm

Author
Reply

wow! aww thank you soo much! this actaully means alot!,i tend to write more short stories and add so much description, it could be a novel!,but when ni try i always get stuck because i add so much! and of course il check it out, id love to repay the favour! xoxox again thank you so much! ~chloe~ xoxox

Sun, April 8th, 2012 7:53am

littlemissromance13

I love your descriptions. That is a very good thing. :D Thanks for the invite to check this out. xoxo

Sun, April 8th, 2012 7:13pm

Author
Reply

Haha thanks! :D xoxox ~chloe~

Sun, April 8th, 2012 12:52pm

Melissa Alburney

This was so beautiful Chloe! I really enjoyed your descriptions: they were beautiful and so well written. Wonderful job girl!
~Lissa

Mon, April 9th, 2012 3:54pm

Author
Reply

Aww thank you! I'm a huge fan of your so this actually means alot! ~chloe~ xox

Tue, April 10th, 2012 1:45am

LupusAmator

:O This was so descriptive! I'm so jealous, since I know I can't describe at ALL. What else can I say? I'm kind of lost for words, lol. Amazing!!

Wed, April 11th, 2012 3:07pm

Author
Reply

Wow! Thank-you soo much!!! Your jelly? !?! Nothing to be jelly for! xD lol ~chloe~ xox

Wed, April 11th, 2012 11:07am

Pharaoh888

Amazingly Beautiful! Your descriptions are so pure, and your words are heart-warming, and the plot is very attractive! Unlike any short story I have ever read! Brilliant! One suggestion though: Try to make more paragraphs in future writing, don't put too many sentences stuck together, it kinda made me lost, so be careful with that. All in all, I loved it! Keep it up :)

Sun, April 22nd, 2012 9:59am

Author
Reply

Oh wow thank you so much your comment made me smile soo much!! And yes I will edit to paragraphs sometimes booksie messes up the formatting :L but thank you for your lovely comment it means alot!!! :D

Wed, April 25th, 2012 12:54am

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