Am I Dead inside

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
A man who travels for years, only wanting change. When he realizes why, he feels he is dead inside.

This is also my first short story, hope you enjoy.

Submitted: January 10, 2012

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Submitted: January 10, 2012

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Year after year after year, he continued to move. He told himself he liked the change, and that he got tired of the same old thing. " Am i just lying to myself" He thought as he lay on his van looking at the stars. "Am i running from something, or do I mean what i say". At this piont he was going cross country, from Florida to Arizona. He decided to stop for the night at a park. He feels a warm summer heat roll over him as he lay back and look at the stars. " Maybe I just got used to moving as a child" he had been over this 20 times by now. "Am I truly just dead inside".

 

He arrives in Arizona finally, enters the town Kingman. He decides to check out the sites for the day, get used to his new surroundings. Stoping at a restuerant for breakfast, the subject comes to mind again. " Am I realy dead inside?" He stops and thinks " not now". When he enters the restuerant hoping for a warm welcome like there was in the country, he is sadly dissapointed. " What would you like" Says the waitress that looked dead inside. " Just a burger and fries... oh and a coke please" He responds. She writes it down on her sheet of paper and yells at the cook to wake up, giving him the order. " Is everyone here dead inside" He thought to himself. He observes everyone in the diner, all looking sad and.... dead inside.

 

Night has started to come so he goes to a local inn. " Hi! May I but a room" He says as he walks in. " Which room" She asked. " One with a bathroom and a tv would be fine. " 20 dollors" She responds grimly. He hands the money over and takes the key. When he gets to his room he finds a man hanging. He begins to freak out when he realizes.... it's him. He blinks a couple times in amazment, and it dissapeared. He went back to the woman at the desk to tell her he needed a new room. When she asked why, he replied saying with silence. Little did he realize that the more he stayed, the worse it would get.

 

He stayed for two more weeks until he decided to leave. He couldn't stand it anymore. He started to see more and more deaths, the people in those deaths were him. He packed up what little he had, and left. As he was leaving it would seem that everyone was looking at him, the only problem was they weren't alive. The waitress was almost skinless, and all her blood seemed to be dried. The cheff had no left eye and only one arm. The more he drove, the worse it got. After 10 minutes of driving, he finally escaped. 

 

He left the town in his rear view mirror, right were he wanted it. He promised himself never to enter again. After 20 minutes of driving in the desert, he came upon a new town. He was relieved, that is until he saw the welcome sign. " Welcome to Kingman Arizona" it read. " No.... NO!" he screamed to himself as he reads. He drives of the side of the road hoping to end his own life.

 

Waking up in a white room wondering, machines connected to himself. Memories come flooding in of what had happened and what he had done. " A nurse comes in to check on him and is happy to see he is awake. " What happened, where am I" He asked dazed. " Kingman Hospital" She replied. " What happened" He asked. " You fell off the road, we assume you were asleep, lucky for you someone found you and helped you out" She answered happily. They let him out a few days early, as he wondered around town he realized that they were all alive and well. It was his new beggining, and last. He had a dream last night of falling asleep at the wheel of his van, driving off the side of a road, and ending up in a hospital. " Maybe this is what happened" He had hoped. Either way i don't want to find out.


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