Analog Watch

Reads: 509  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 6

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Reddit
  • Pinterest
  • Invite

Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic

People scoff at First World problems, but they really are issues to people having to endure them.

I utter a monumental groan as I attempt to roll over in bed. It would sound quite frightful to anyone within earshot, but that's not a problem anymore. I have sent my brother to an assisted living facility and have the house to myself.

Pushing myself into an upright position is going to hurt. It can't be helped. I'm on my own. I've got to do this myself. There is no alternative.

I glance at my wristwatch. It says 8:42. From the sunlight streaming in behind the bedroom curtains, I deduce it is 8:42 a.m. If it were p.m. this time of year, it would be dark outside. That's what's wrong with analog watches. They don't distinguish between ante- and post-meridiem.

Hmm, 8:42? There's the problem. I have overslept. I have missed my pain medication by nearly three quarters of an hour. My bad. I deserve the agony. I am not one to blame my mistakes on others.

The watch says 8:43 as a waddle my way to the kitchen in search of a banana or an oatmeal cookie. I have to take these drugs with something to eat. Otherwise, they make me nauseous. They also make me constipated whether or not I eat anything, but I have already covered that issue in my Thunder Throne story.

I have one of those day/date watches. I can't live without such things. Being a retired hermit, I rarely know what day of the week it may be, and I almost never know what day of the month it is. Without my watch telling me these things, I'd miss a whole bunch of doctors' appointments, something I really can't afford given my condition.

The day/date on the watch says, "THU 31". Okay, I know that can't be right. Oh, I'm pretty sure it's Thursday, but there is no such day as September 31. I pull out the stem on the watch one notch and rotate the crown. The numeral "1" appears in the date window with an audible *click*. I then push the stem back into the normal position.

Okay, it is now officially October on my wrist. That would make everything alright with the universe except for the fact that I am eight hours, forty-four minutes and an unknown number of seconds late in celebrating the start of Lilifest. So, sue me.

By the way, Lilifest is not celebrated everywhere, so one need not wonder what I'm talking about. It only matters to Lili and those of us who try to placate her majesty by acknowledging her importance in our lives, and, believe me, she is just about the most important person in my life.

Anyway, methinks that perhaps I should invest in a digital watch. It would handle the am/pm problem automatically. Heck, it would even give the time on a 24 hour clock should I feel the need to go all gung-ho military, or alternatively, should I decide to display European class sophistication. It wouldn't need my intervention to set the day of the month correctly, and, with the proper software, it would even handle the springing forward and falling back on the standard/daylight saving time boundaries.

On the other hand, why bother getting a digital watch? Just like those smart phone thingys, I probably wouldn't know how to operate the device. Then too, if the doctors are correct, the cancer will kill me before I could observe and appreciate all the nifty features. Sigh! Like Gilda Radner used to say, "It's always something."

Copyright © 2015 W.C. Bell; All rights reserved.


Submitted: October 01, 2015

© Copyright 2022 Whiskey Charlie. All rights reserved.

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Reddit
  • Pinterest
  • Invite

Add Your Comments:

Comments

H. Adams

Gosh, Booksie's really getting on my nerves. I asked to get email notifications for your stories and yet they aren't showing up (none of them are from any authors, so it's not just you). I'm sincerely hoping the update helps to fix that. I've always used my phone as a clock, but my grandpa wore this watch with a linked wristband that I loved wearing when he'd let me. If I had the money, I'd invest in a watch. Heck, I might even add it onto the Christmas list! He always wore it when I was really little, and I would sleep over his house on the weekends because my mom worked. He'd usually give it to me then. I was so confused about the roman numerals that labeled the hours and now I feel so silly about it. I enjoyed the read, Whiskey :)

Fri, October 2nd, 2015 1:24am

Author
Reply

My dad had a gold pocket watch that he got for his 16th birthday in 1916 (since he was born in 1900, it was always easy to calculate his birthday) That means it is 99 years old, but I have no idea where it may be at the moment. Thanks for the read.

Thu, October 1st, 2015 7:24pm

B Douglas Slack

I have a great analog watch, Charlie. It is a 24-hour watch. That means that 12 is where the 6 normally is and 13-23 rise up the left-hand side. Everyone who sees it thinks it strange, but I like it. I bought it in Germany years ago. ~Tom

Fri, October 2nd, 2015 1:28am

Author
Reply

I used to have a Timex 24 hour watch when I was in the Navy. I wore that thing until it literally fell apart (aided by salt water corrosion from riding around in LCVPs a lot).

Thu, October 1st, 2015 7:27pm

Vance Currie

I like how you can make an interesting story out of something as mundane as a watch. I have had digital watches in the past but I still like my analogue watch, even though I have to remember to change the date after the end of September, April, June and November. I like a watch to have clear numbers though. Roman numerals are confusing, and watches that don't show any numbers are just expensive bracelets. ~ Joe

Fri, October 2nd, 2015 7:38pm

Author
Reply

Thanks for the read, Joe. Yeah, I like my analog watch well enough, but they do have their drawbacks. Anyway, I figured it'd be humorous to take a look at some of the difficulties of same.

Fri, October 2nd, 2015 12:57pm

Labyrinth Black

Well Charlie, digital watches aren't all that good. I'm rubbish at 24 hour clock... ^_^ Made me smiles as always Charlie ^_^

Fri, October 2nd, 2015 11:30pm

Author
Reply

Thanks for the read, Labby. Making you smile is always a goal of mine. Best wishes.

Fri, October 2nd, 2015 6:10pm

Bert Broomberg

Great piece of writing. I think that sometimes the most ordinary things in life are worth wriing about in detail. Especially, all those things we take for granted, although I have to say that watches seem to be on their way out. Most of my pupils can't be bothered with them anymore. Gone are the days you would get a watch that would last you half your life.

Wed, October 28th, 2015 6:23pm

Author
Reply

Ah, yes, Bert. The mundane objects of ordinary existence are so often overlooked, yet they define the age in which they were used. I specifically look for things which people generally ignore in their hectic lives.

Fri, October 30th, 2015 6:59pm

Facebook Comments

Other Content by Whiskey Charlie

Short Story / Fantasy

Short Story / Fantasy

Short Story / Fantasy