Toll Payment

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Flash Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
Introduction of new Booksie member.

Submitted: November 16, 2014

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Submitted: November 16, 2014

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There is an alien portal in my garage. It is the point through which the landlords, or in this case the planet lords, gain entrance and egress to their local holdings. Their property hereabouts consists of the entire solar system. It is one of their smaller developments in this galaxy.

The aliens come and go through the portal anytime they see fit, however, they have to use my garage door to gain access to the outer world. I charge them a toll for the privilege. Since there is some fundamental law of physics preventing the building of a second portal on Earth, I have a monopoly on alien movement. That fact gives me a strong hand in door toll negotiations.

Obviously any intelligence advanced enough to hop about the galaxy could squash me like a bug. They choose not to do so. They have a very strict code of ethics. They respect the property rights of any creature sentient enough to understand the concept. I have no doubt they would vote Republican if given the chance.

Unfortunately, at least from my point of view, the door toll will never make me rich. Again it is a matter of alien ethics. Since money is truly the root of all evil, they would never deal in anything as crass and filthy as wealth.

I broached the idea that they might pay me an annual tribute of 20 young virgins. Naturally, they turned that down flat. No doubt they were abolitionists back in the day. At any rate, my proposal was facetious, but aliens apparently have no sense of humor.

Negotiations dragged on until the wee hours of the morning. Exhausted after 12 hours of non-stop haggling, we finally settled on my having free access to their intergalactic communications network in order that I might engage in my hobby of writing. The network node on Earth is this web site. So, Booksie, all parties having signed the agreement, here I am.


© Copyright 2020 Whiskey Charlie. All rights reserved.

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