I Couldn't Save Them

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic
A short story about Depravity City's premiere doctor, Patrick Kimble deal with his inner demons.

Submitted: August 19, 2010

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Submitted: August 19, 2010

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I Couldn't Save Them

by Matthew Simmons

I'm in a field wild roses. I'm laying on my back as the sun pours it's radiant light all over me. The beautiful green grass tickles my smooth shaven cheeks, and my short dark brown hair flows back with each cooling breeze. I roll over to look into a pair of deep brown eyes, and shining blonde hair. Her skin is so soft I can't help but touch her, so smooth and perfect. This woman's name is Shelby, and she is my life. It is July 10th 2007.

"What are you thinkin about Pat?" she asks as she runs her fingers through my hair. I place my hand on her stomach and rub back and forth lovingly

"I'm thinking about you in pregger pants," I say playfully to see her reaction. "Ha, ha very funny Dr. Kimble." I'm trapped in this moment. It has wrapped it's coils around my neck and refuses to let me move on, and I just don't want to.

"Dr. Kimble, Dr. Kimble?" I snap back to the present. It is August 3rd 2009, and I am in Memmorial Herman Hospital infront of a score of people in pain with illnesses, and wounds, but I could careless. My father always told me that if I became a doctor I'd better prepare for tough times or I'd become bitter and jaded.

"Dr. Kimble, your needed for an open heart in twenty," Bill tells me as he passes by me. Bill is a man full of joy and hope. He is a newly wed and his first child is on the way. I hate him.

I continue to walk down the long cold hallway of the hospital until I'm trapped once again in the past. I look to the left and to the right of myself to see that it is now May 5th 2007 and Shelby is now in the hospital with me laying on one of the hospital beds in room 2033 giving birth to our baby girl. I shutter with anixiety and fear as she screams, tosses and turns in the bed. She grips my hand as if she is trying to break it. I try to calm her, by saying things to take her mind off the pain.

I begin to flutter in and out of the dream and reality. I can barely stand. I walk into the room that brought about my first greatest failure. I sit on the chair in the far corner of the room and begin to cry as flashes of my wife and reality shift until finally I have relived the moment for the fifteenth time this month. I slide out of the chair and onto the floor. My baby girl died two minutes after being brought into the world, and I have no idea how or why. 

I am now on the floor of the hospital room where my daughter died. I am crying unceasingly as I realize another doctor is now in the room with me. Dr. Regina Talbet, an old colleage, the woman who introduced Shelby and I years ago.

"Pat, why don't you go home, take the rest of the day off, I'll cover for you." The olive skinned ebony queen helps lift me off the floor. She is strong. Regina has always been like a sister to me.

I leave the hospital and arrive home in what felt like seconds. As I sit in the kitchen of my two floor home I drink my sorrows away and begin to walk up the steps. I am alone in my home when the second episode begins. My second biggest failure flashes before my eyes.

"I sorry Pat. I love you," Shelby says. It is May 5th 2008. Our late child's birthday. Earlier she wanted to go somewhere high up. She wanted to feel the breeze of the wind sweep her hair back. I took her to the top of the hospital. "It has the most amazing view of Houston." At least it did back then.

"I'm so sorry Pat I can't do this anymore!" She shouts at me before she never says anything to me again. As I watched I began to roar with anger and pain, and sorrow swept my heart as I dropped to my knees. We had been going to marriage counciling for the past year, trying to fix the gap that had been put between us. I am alone now and nothing I could ever do will fix it. For the next year I force myself to smile and to keep up the charade of happiness until I give in and I try to end my life, but Regina stopped me. Someday I'll find my light again but for now I'll sleep in the dark.

 


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