Unforgivably Scarred

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic
It's a story about a girl who gets kidnapped and how she finds love within it all.

Submitted: December 28, 2011

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Submitted: December 28, 2011

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I got up from the cardboard box I was laying in and found the closest public bathroom I could find. Being two am in the morning, not very many people were out. I went into a bar that was closing and slipped my way in. I found some lost make-up and put it on. I was going to sell myself out on the street, like I always do. I make a good amount of money. That’s how I get my drugs. Now I haven’t ever had a solid relationship, not ever. Considering the fact that my parents abandoned me, when I was a baby, and left me on the front porch of some old lady’s house. She was nice and took care of me until I was 14. I ran away, done with everything that had happened to me. I was judged at school and made fun as the orphan who lived with pedophile granny. Yeah that’s what she was called, but her name was Lilian, Lilian Canthem. I never really did anything bad, while I lived with her, I had descent grades, and I guess she enjoyed my presence. After I ran away though, I was weak. No food, no water, no nothing. Lilian never sent anybody out to find me, never filed a missing persons report. At first I was confused, but then I remembered that she was old and old people forget. Then I considered that she probably could’ve died.

 

In the beginning when I was first getting started in the drug industry I made a friend. His name was Izzy. Izzy was a nice dude. Taught me everything I know. Taught me everything that I needed to survive out here on my own. I guess you can say I enjoyed having a companion. A year later though, he got shot by some other drug dealers, who wanted their money and he didn’t have it. I was put in a deep state of depression, after that I decided to take up the life I have now. I come to think of it, if Izzy hadn’t died maybe I wouldn’t be here. Oh hell I’d probably still be here, it just wouldn’t be as bad as it is now. 

 

In the girl’s bathroom I heard the manager screaming at all the drunks and junkies to get out because the bar was closing. I smudged on some last streaks of make-up before I merged out with the last of the intoxicated. I went to the corner of Dalcon and Nelson. A few cars stopped by, but they thought my prices were too high. That’s okay though, I have some regulars that come by every once in a while and are willing to pay double. Next thing I know a black Sedan pulls up. The passenger side window rolls down. The driver looks my age,17. He sounded familiar. I think I used to go to school with him before I dropped out. Well before I “disappeared”. He said that he’d take a regular? I don’t know for sure, but I gave him a price anyway. Then he told me to get in the car, which I did. Getting into strangers cars was no problem for me. I was used to it, but in this car it felt weird. Odd, but homey. The car smelt like evergreen trees. My favorite trees. His eyes were a piercing ice blue that seeped into my soul. His hair was dirty blonde almost brown, like mine. He had this distressed look on his face. All of a sudden I was ripped from my seat. I guess during the time I was studying him that I had blanked on what was happening. I was just shell shocked, by how quick and firmly I was gripped. I was taken into a room. The paint on the walls was crimson red and the flooring was maple wood. The guy put me on the bed, or rather threw me on the bed. My heart was pounding, I could feel my blood pulsing. Then at that moment, I knew I was scared.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

I stammered, “W- what’s y-your n-name?” He said that his name was Jason. I swear I’ve heard that name before, but I wasn’t certain that I had just went to school with him. Then Jason said, “ Now I don’t want your money and I don’t want to have sex with you. I just want to know you. Like what’s your name and all that stuff.” I shot back in a smart ass tone, “You picked me up off the street because you want to know me? Aha. Wow. Never heard that one before. You’re just afraid to admit that you like this stuff.” He gave me this weird look, like that you honestly don’t believe me look. “ Look, uh uh...”, he said. “Autum. That’s my name and don’t wear it out”, I said. “Look Autumn, I don’t want your body. The only reason I picked you up off the street is because I want to help you, and you caught my eye.” “Yeah, sure I caught your eye at two am in the morning” , I snorted sarcastically. “ I don’t know why I did this. I not the kind of person to just you know, pick people up off the street at two am in the morning. But you, you ring a bell. I feel some connection to you and I feel that you’re in pain. You just don’t show it. That’s one thing that happens when you live out on the streets and do drugs. You get hardened.” He said it so matter-of-factly that it surprised  me. How would he know what happens out on the streets. He doesn’t look anything like a guy who did drugs and lived on the streets. Then he said, “Listen I’m gonna help clean you up. Like get you off all the drugs and get you a job and everything. Get your life back on the tracks before a train comes by and hits you.” Did he really just say he was going to take me in and like give me therapy by taking away my drugs! I cannot survive without my drugs. I need them. They’re the only thing I have left. I’m going to have to get out of here. Leave this place before I get molested and start having withdrawals. 

 

Then he said, “ So tell me, what’s your life story?” For some weird reason I started to tell him. I needed to vent. Ever since Izzy died I’ve kept it all inside, and now of all times I started to cry. I blacked out. Sometimes I’m glad that I black out. I don’t want to feel the salty, warm tears running down my thin cheeks. When I came to Jason was sitting in a chair by the door.  Then I thought to myself WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING! Why am I here and why and I not putting up a fight. I couldn’t understand anything. It was as if my brain went mute like it was controlled by a T.V. remote. I saw Jason’s lips moving, but I couldn’t hear anything coming out. After a few minutes, I fell asleep again.

 

When I awoke, it was morning. The clock that was hanging on the wall read 9:20 am. There was a light knock on the door and then Jason came in. It was bizarre that I was comforted by seeing him. He came in with breakfast. Pancakes, eggs, and bacon. I can’t tell you the last time I had eaten pancakes. I devoured the food in no time. I was so hungry, but I hardly noticed it. “ If you need anything just knock on the door okay? Oh, since we are detoxicating you of any drugs you have in you system, you will probably start to have withdrawals. You can either choose to let us drug you so you can sleep through the beginning or you can just deal with it. Which will it be?” He said it so kindhearted  that I didn’t mind what happened. “Um, can you drug me so I can sleep through it?”, I said meekly. “Of, course”, he said. Later during the day around 1 he came in and gave me a pill to swallow. I was out within minutes.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~ 

 

While I was blacked out, I had many dreams. Dreams about my past, dreams about the present, dreams about my possible future, the odd thing was that all of these dreams had Jason in them. He might not’ve been a main person in them, but he was always there. In one dream He was in the park, by the slide, while I was on the swings and in another he was driving in the car that was next to the one I was driving in. 

 

Four days later I woke up. I was so groggy and hungry, but I didn’t have the strength to get up and knock at the door. I just lay there in the bed, thinking. I thought about my dreams and what they could’ve meant. After a while I gave up on that and pushed my self to sit up in the bed. I swung my feet off the edge of the bed. I felt like a zombie. I forced myself off the bed and lightly padded to the door. Then I knocked on the door, it was such a soft knock that I doubt he heard it, but still I went back to bed to lay down. Five minutes after I had knocked on the door Jason came in with a turkey sandwich and some water. He handed me the platter of food. He watched me intently as I ate the food and drank the water. When I finished my meal, he took the tray and put it on the nightstand.

 

“So, you never did really tell me about your life story.” He had a funny smile when he said it. It was cute. “Oh, yeah aha sorry about that”, I said. “No problem. So where are your parents and why do you sell yourself on the streets to people you don’t even know?” he asked. “Well, my parents, they kinda abandoned me when I was a baby and I sell myself out on the streets, because that’s how I get my money for everything I need.” I began to explain more, but then he interrupted saying, “ I know how it is. My parents left in a dumpster behind a bar when I was a month old. I was put into the foster care system like any other kid or orphan. I was thrown from home, to home. I didn’t enjoy it so I finally decided to run away when I was 13. I got started out in drugs early in my life and I regret every year I ever did drugs. About a year ago I decided to get my life back together and restart. So I got a job and got clean and I’m happy as I could ever be. There are temptations, but you learn how to control them in time and you see how much better off you are without the drugs.” He seemed to be telling the truth. He did seem pretty happy, but he looked like he also had a piece missing.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

“So, Jason, did you go to Town River Elementary and Sunrise Valley Middle School?” I asked. “Yeah. How did you know?” he said surprised. “I used to go there, plus you looked familiar.” I said matter-of-factly. “So we went to school together? That probably explains why I was drawn to you. You were familiar in a way.” He said. “I guess so.”, I said in a small voice. After that, he left. I don’t know what it was, but I knew he was missing something. There was something about him I just, I don’t know. I can’t explain it.

 

I had to find out what was missing about him. I needed to dig deeper. I don’t know why I was so interested, but I was intrigued by his past. We had similar stories, well except for the part where he got cleaned up. 

 

Right when I was about to go back to sleep he came in. “Do you want some company?” he asked. “Sure, I guess.” “Okay. So what do you want to talk about?” Jason sat down in the chair by the door. “I guess we can talk about anything. Maybe we can play twenty questions?” I proposed. I was taking this as the chance to go deeper into what was missing about him. This was a good opportunity.”You start.” he said.

 “Okay. Why did you start doing drugs?”

“I just found it as a good escape from reality I guess.”

“Hmm..Okay your turn.”

“Why did you start doing drugs?”

“ I don’t know. It just helped with my depression after my friend died.”

“What friend died?”

“Oh, it was...Hey! It’s my turn!!”

“Oh, yeah sorry ahahaha.”

“Why did you decide to turn your life around?”

“I just felt it would be better. I remember hearing about kids who did drugs, and they didn’t lead good lives. I didn’t want to lead a bad life.”

“I see.”

“Why did you run away?”

“I didn’t want to deal with what was going on. People used to make fun of me, as you might remember.”

“I kinda do.”
“ What do you want most in life?”

“What I want is..I want to live a good life and fulfill all of my goals and dreams.”

“You don’t seem like you once were a junkie.”

“I don’t want to. So, who was your friend that died?”

“Oh, I didn’t think you were gonna ask that.”

“It’s ok you don’t have to answer if you don’t want too.”

“No, no it’s okay. I’ll tell you. It was my friend Izzy. He actually got me started in the drug industry, but he was a really good friend.”

“Oh..”

“Did you have any friends while you were doing drugs?

“Not that many. Just 3.”

“That’s more than I had.”

“Do you like to take drugs?”

“Well, I’m not sure. I haven’t been clean since I was 14, but I like how they make me feel.”

“Really? Well I guarantee that you’ll like being clean better.”

“Maybe. You’re getting bored with this aren’t you?”
“Just a little.”

“We don’t have to play anymore but I have a question. How long have I been here?”

“You’ve been here for 3 months. Its been a while since I picked you up off the street.”

“I guess so. Also, when can I leave this room and go out in public? Or can I at least be able to wander around the house?”

“Well you can’t go out of he house yet, but you can wander around the house tomorrow, I’ll give you a tour of the house. Promise.”

“Okay.”

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

That next morning, like Jason promised I got  a tour of the house.  It was three bedrooms and three bathrooms. Downstairs was the kitchen, living room, and a guest bedroom. The kitchen was enormous! It had all the new and updated appliances too. In the living room was a three seater black leather couch and a sixty inch flat screen T.V. I’ve never seen a T.V. so big in my life! The downstairs guest bedroom was a fair size with a nice bathroom too. Upstairs was the master bedroom and the other guest bedroom, which I was staying in. The master bedroom was immense. It also had a a master bath to go along with it. In the bathroom was a large shower, toilet, sink, and a jacuzzi tub that could fit seven people in it! In the bedroom was a California King bed and another sixty inch flat screen T.V. directly in front of the bed. There was two walk-in closets, but Jason only used one. The other was used for storage he had said. I can’t imagine that only just one person lives here. 

 

“You know, I don’t like sleeping in this room, so you can have it if you want.” Jason posed.  “Are you sure? I mean only if you are 100% sure.” I replied. “No, it’s no problem. I actually prefer to sleep on the couch. Um, I know this might be an awkward question, but do you want me to buy you some clothes? Like pajamas and stuff, because you’ve been in those clothes since I first saw you. Oh! and feel free to take a shower whenever you want.” He babbled. “Okay and yes please. It would be nice to change out of these clothes. Thanks so much.” I said. He gave me a sweet smile and left. I stood there bewildered until I heard his car door slam. 

 

I didn’t know what else to do, so I undressed and got in the shower. It had been a long time since I took a shower. The nice, calm, and warming droplets hitting your back with a soothing rythm. I must’ve spent forever in the shower; I didn’t want to get out. I scrubbed my hair of all the previous dirt that had gathered on my scalp from when I was living on the streets. It felt good to be bathed. I felt like I was given a clean slate. A fresh start.

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

I don’t remember the last time I had feelings. That’s one thing I never missed. Well maybe every once in a while I did, but most of the time I didn’t.  I didn’t want to feel ashamed of myself for what I was doing. I knew the good me would want to stop, so I had to mute it out.  But, now, now it felt good to feel again. It felt good to know what I was doing. I wasn’t just doing things out on a whim or for no reason. I now had reason. I heard the car door to Jason’s Sedan shut just as I was getting out of the shower. I quickly wrapped the towel around me and hid. I don’t know why I hid. I just did.

 

“Hello. Autumn?? Where are you?”, Jason yelled from downstairs. I kept quiet. I didn’t want him to find me. I didn’t really want to be held captive here. I mean being clean was nice and all, I most likely wouldn’t do drugs again, but I don’t want to be stuck here for the rest of my life. I heard Jason treading up the stairs. I slowed my breathing and squatted in the corner of the closet behind a bunch of clothes. He came inside the room. “Autumn where are you?”, he said in a questioning voice. “Are you trying to hide from me?”, he uttered. I wanted to run away. I don’t want him to ever find me. Wasn’t this considered kidnapping? I heard the closet door open; I saw Jason’s black converse walking around the closet. Next thing I know he’s picking me up off the ground from where I was hiding. “Why the hell were you hiding?!”, he screamed. “I-I-I don’t know.”, I said in a small voice. “What do you mean you don’t know!!”, he screeched. He slapped me and threw me to the ground. I softly started to cry.

 

This is where I hated having feelings. I didn’t want to feel like this anymore.  After an hour of weeping, I realized that I was still in my towel. I went to go get my new clothes when I noticed that there was none. I didn’t want to go downstairs to ask if I could have them because I didn’t want to get screamed or yelled at again. I walked slowly to the bathroom where I had left my dirty old clothes. I didn’t want to put on my dirt-caked clothes, so I put the towel around me and knotted it. Then I stuck my clothes in the sink and washed them with the water and the soap. After I was done washing them I realized I probably would’ve been better off just wearing the clothes than washing them. I found another towel from the cabinet in the bathroom. I twisted all the water out of my clothing then grabbed the towel and tried to pre-dry them. I then put the on the counter to dry. I decided to watch T.V. inside my towel and sit on one of the chairs that was in the room. My eyes were still puffy from crying and I had a hand print on my left cheek. I didn’t realize how much it hurt until it started to burn. Around twelve am I heard Jason leave. I was relieved. I went to the door to try and get out but it was locked from the outside! He locked me in here! All I wanted was to find my new clothing and eat! I was starving I hadn’t eaten for a day.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

It was 3 more days before Jason came in and left my new clothes in the room and some food for me to eat. I slipped on the pajamas because I didn’t want to be in any other clothing except for soft, and warm pajamas. I ate the food as quickly as any person could. I got into the bed and turned on the T.V. Jersey Shore was on MTV, so i decided to watch it. When it was on the commercials, I muted the T.V. I could’ve sworn I heard someone screaming from across the hall.

 

I went to go see if my door would unlock. No luck. I went back to watch Jersey Shore when I knew I heard screaming. It sounded like a girl. I know for sure that she sounded maybe 13 or 14. “Why are you doing this to me?! Why’d you lock me inside a room?!”, the voice quivered. “Hello!”, I yelled. “Hello! Help!”, the voice screamed back on the verge of tears. “Who are you? Where are you?”, I said. “I don’t know what’s happening. Some guy picked me up off the streets last night around one in the morning and then I woke up here! Who are you!?”, the voice stammered. “I’m Au...”,I began. Before I could finish my sentence my door swung open and Jason was standing in the frame of it. “Why are you talking to her?”, he said in a low toned voice. “Um, um, who?”, I replied. “Julie. Why are you talking to her?”, he asked. “I’m sorry. I’m just..”, I scrambled. “Enough already!”, he bellowed. He walked out, closed the door, and locked it.

 

I heard Julie howl in pain and start to cry. “Why, why did you hit me?”, she sobbed. “Shut up!”, Jason commanded. I went and curled up in the bed. I felt really bad for Julie. I don’t know why Jason was doing this. He was so nice in the beginning, why was he being so mean? 

 

It took me a long time to fall asleep. What woke me up though was a young man screaming saying, “No! No! I don’t want to go inside with you. Leave me alone! Leave me alone! I thought you were my friend! Why are you doing this Jason?!”, he stuttered. Obviously he knew him. I heard a screech of pain and then silence. I’m not really sure what happened, but my guess if that the guy must’ve passes out. Jason was pulling Julie by her wrists and flung her into the room I was in. She dropped to the ground the instant he closed the door. I walked over to her bent body. “Julie? Are you ok?”, I asked. All I heard were quiet sobs escaping her then lips. “Why is he doing this?”, she whimpered. I saw bruises all over here petite body. I could tell she was starving. Her ribs were poking out of her ripped up clothing. “Julie, how old are you?”, I said. “14.”, she replied. That’s what I had guessed. “Come here. I have extra pajamas that might be a little big on you, but you can wear them. You can also take a shower if you would like. She took me up on the offer to take a shower and borrow my pajamas. They were a little big, but I just rolled up the pant legs and sleeves. Afterwards I told her she could sleep in the bed and that I would just sleep on the mini couch. She said that it was okay, but I insisted. Tomorrow I’m going to try and see if I can leave the room.

 

 

 

 

  ~~~~~~~~~~

 

I woke up with a crick in my neck. I eventually got it out, but it was a painful one. I got up and tip-toed to the door. I tried to open it. As I had guessed it was locked. I rummaged through the room to see if there was anything I could pick the lock with. I couldn’t find anything. He must’ve known that we would try to escape. Later he came in a left a tray of food. One peanut butter and jelly sandwich with a glass of milk. I gave Julie one half and I got the other. We both drank half of the milk, but we made sure to conserve some of it too. This food wasn’t enough to quench our hunger or thirst. It wasn’t enough to even quench one persons! He must’ve been trying to starve us.

 

I decided to ask Julie why she was here and what had happened. 

“So, Julie what happened after he brought you here?”

“ He put me in a room and left me in there. At first I trusted him a little and he seemed nice, but once I asked if I could have more food he went all psycho on me. He slapped me on the face then slugged me in the stomach.” She lifted her shirt enough to show her stomach. I saw an apple sized bruise on the right side. I gasped in horror. How could he do such a thing to a young girl. If he had brought me here for being on drugs, or being out on the street, she must be here for a similar reason.

“Julie did you ever live out on the streets and do drugs?”

“What! No! My parents told me to never do drugs, so I didn’t. Besides drugs are bad for you.”

“What were you doing out on the street at one am in the morning though?”

“I was angry at my dad for yelling at me so I decided to go for a walk. Then BAM! I get kidnapped. My parents will be looking for me though. They are the most overprotective people I know. Soon we’ll be found.”

“Do you know if he brought somebody else here?”

“Yeah. He did. That’s why he put me in this room.”

“What did the person look like?”

“Well he look like he was 17 or 18. He had bleach blonde hair and aqua blue-green eyes.”

“Oh my gosh! I think I know who that is. I think it’s Maxwell Chance.”

“How would you know him?”

“I used to go to school with him before I dropped out of school. He was also the most popular kid in school.”

“Why’d you drop out of school?”

“I ran away.”

“Why?”

“It’s a long story and I don’t want to put any more of a load on your shoulders than there already is.”

“Okay.”

Julie turned on the T.V. to Disney Channel and started to watch some show that I’ve never seen before. Oh well I had nothing better to do so I watched it with her.

 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

The next two days we weren’t fed. I could tell Julie was starving because I head her stomach growl every five minutes. At least we had access to tap water. We talked a lot, mostly about her life. I didn’t want to freak her out or anything. She was a straight A student with and excellent attitude and 40 awards. She went to Pine Crest Middle School. She said that she has many friends, but doesn’t like to deal with drama. In a way we we a little similar. I had a few friends and didn’t like to deal with drama, but I didn’t have stellar grades.

 

“Dude, seriously stop!”, said Max. “Aughh.” It sounded like a grunt of pain coming from Max. THUD! The sound of a body hitting the floor. “You little piece of..!”, Jason screamed. The throwing of punches. The agonizing screams. It was all to much, for both  Julie and me. Julie started to sob. I went up next to her and hugged her, while she caved in to me. I stroked her hair, Julie had become a younger sister to me in the past week. I felt like I knew everything about her. She confided in my all the time and I confided in her. Well only the stuff that I knew should could handle.

 

Screams echoed throughout the house. I hope Julie’s parents really are looking for her, because I want to leave this hell hole. But wait, those screams weren’t a mans screams, they were a girls. Oh my gosh! He got another girl. After all it was around two or three am. SLAM! the door from downstairs just got closed. I hear the stomping of feet, more than just than one pair. “Don’t lock me up!”, howled the girl in between sobs. She didn’t sound like she was in the room. Then I heard struggling. Grunts coming from two guys. I saw the doorknob starts to move. All of a sudden Max is in our room and the door is locked once more. Max pounds at the door, kicking and screaming at it. All I could hear was the poor girl. Max twisted around to face me and Julie. He saw our tear streaked faces and I could see sorrow in his eyes. I never thought Maxwell was the kind of guy that felt bad for people,after all he was part of the popular group. He walked towards us. ‘What are your names?, he asked. “Autumn and Julie.”, I said. I wonder if he remembers me. “Autumn? From school?”, he said surprised. I nodded. “I thought you were dead!”, he exclaimed. I didn’t respond. I nudged Julie and whispered for her to go lay in the bed and turn on the T.V. She did as I said. I signaled for Max to follow me into the bathroom so we could talk. 

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

“So how’d you end up here?”, I questioned. “Jason tricked me, said he was talking me to a party. I always knew that he was messed up though. He always used to say that he has girls back at his house all the time, but he doesn’t use them. I never believed him, but now I guess I do.”, he gushed. “Did you get a good look at the other girl he brought in?”, I asked. “It was his ex-girlfriend. She absolutely hates him. Now that he’s got her I have no idea what he’ll do to her. I mean he once had her under control and feels like he’s the boss of her. He might not lay a hand on you guys, but god only knows what he’ll do to her.”, he said it like he knew what Jason was capable of. Maybe he knew. “Why’d he bring us all here?”, I interrogated. “I don’t know. Like I said Jason’s messed up. He could be planning something that we all don’t know about.”, he said. I got the chills. What could he be planning to do? Nothing I could think of. Maybe it was so bad that not even I could guess it.

 

We walked out of the bathroom. I decided to lay in the bed with Julie so Max could sleep on the couch. It was almost 5 in the morning and I had been up most the night with all the conflict going on. Right when I slipped into bed I passed out. Exhausted from everything that had been happening. I had mini nightmares throughout the night. At one point in the night I felt someone shaking me awake. It was Max. “Are you alright? You’ve been screaming for the past 15 minutes.”, he said in a shaky voice. “Yeah, yeah I’m fine. I just... never mind.”, I said. “Ok.” He walked away. I don;t understand why he did that. Max was always snobby and only cared about girls with big boobs,butts and were willing to put out, all of which I was qualified for. So why was he being so nice to me? No way to tell unless I ask, but I don’t really think like it.

 

Around 1pm we all woke up. I was famished, along with poor little Julie. Jason hadn’t fed me and here for the past four days. We were surviving off of the tap water we got from the bathroom. “Hey, Max when was the last time you ate?”, I questioned. “Um, yesterday. Jason gave me some grub.”, he said as he kicked back on the couch. So I guess he feeds you the first few days then forgets because he has a new hostage to take care of. “Why?”, he pressed. “Well me and Julie haven’t eaten in four days and are starving?”, I replied. He gave me a surprised look. “Wow.”, he said. Julie got up out of the bed to go take a shower. Max watched her and saw how skinny she was. He ribs were showing even more from the last time I saw her. She must ache for food. I can last longer without food because I went weeks without it, but pitiful Julie had probably been fed everyday of her life.

 

I guess Jason left some food at the door while Julie and I were taking a nap. The last few day have been sleepless. Max didn’t eat any of it. He said that we needed it more than him. Max was being unusually nice. Unless, maybe he really was nice. I just didn’t notice it before. I finally decided to ask him what was going on. “Ok. How come at school your mean and ignore everybody, but here your nice than I ever knew?”, I blurted out. Max stood there stunned. Most likely because I had just called him out. “Eh, um, I.....”, he stammered. “Yes?”, I said. “I..I..Well when you’re part of the popular group everyone expects you to be mean, but in real life I’m actually pretty nice. I do work for charities because when I’m mean at school I feel dirty and doing charity work feels like it cleans me.”, he confessed. “So basically you hide your true personality because you’re afraid of what people will think?” I said not surprised. “Yeah. I mean once you’re popular you can’t really get out. You’re expected to be that way forever.”, he remarked. “I guess I would never know because I’m not popular.”, I uttered. He huffed in disagreement.

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

Last thing I remember is passing out on the couch watching MTV’s 16 and Pregnant. Those girls just wanted to be on T.V. I swear. Now I was on the bed. How in the freaking hell did I get on the bed. I know for sure I don’t sleep walk and I know for sure Julie couldn’t have carried me, so that leaves on person left. Max. I think I was starting to like him. He took care of Julie the way a parent takes care of their own child. He was so gentle, so patient. At that moment he seemed the most perfect. I liked this side of Max that I’ve never seen before. Correction I loved this side of Max that I’ve never seen before. I don’t know why he never showed this side of him. He would have a lot more friends if he showed this side of himself rather than the popular “I don’t care about you” look.

 

“You know, when we went to school together you were really pretty without all the make-up on.”, Max complimented. Wow. Just wow. He thought I was pretty. I didn’t even think that he ever noticed me. I mean I was a nothing at school. I’m pretty sure everyone ignored me. Well maybe I was over exaggerating. I had few friends and everyone gave me weird looks. It was still a big deal for guys like him to be looking at me though. I never thought of myself as pretty. I thought I was average, nothing more, nothing less. “Thanks.”, I said and I started to blush. I didn’t think I was capable of blushing.

 

He saw my cheeks turn rosy and started to smile. I felt a little embarrassed, but then again we were being held hostage in some weirdo’s house. I guess it could be worse. I went and sat down on the bed. Julie was watching T.V. again. Being stuck in this room with nothing better to do can get really boring, but at least I haven’t had many bad withdrawals. I can feel a bad one coming on though. I normally have learned to cope with it, but I know that I’m just not going to get through without one bad one, I just know it.

 

I got up and went into the closet to find something to do. I really hope there’s like a board game or something because it gets really boring just being in this room. I searched through every nook and cranny. All of a sudden I collapsed. I just started to cry. I’m not sure why. Maybe because I was under a lot of stress, or I was depressed. Maybe it’s the bad withdrawal I could feel coming on. If it is I really hope this is as bad as it gets because if it’s any worse I don’t know if I can handle it. I must’ve been in the for a while because I heard them saying, “Autumn, where are you?” “In here.”, I sniffled.   “Julie go back and lay in the bad ok?”, Max commanded. I really didn’t want anyone to see me like this, but I guess now I couldn’t help it. “Autumn, What’s wrong?”, Max asked in a concerned voice. “Eh...I...I...I.” I buried my face into my hands and broke down more. I fell into Max’s lap. He patted my back saying that everything was going to be ok. I still couldn’t wrap my head around him actually being nice, but here I was experiencing every piece of his kind heart. I got up after about an hour and flopped into the bed. I didn’t realize how much I wanted to sleep until I closed my lids and went into a deep sleep.

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

I woke up to being shook awake. “Wake up! Wake up!”, Max said in a hushed tone. “What?”, I asked groggily. “We’re going to escape so hurry up out of bed. I have and idea.”, Max whispered. I immediately turned over to Julie and started to wake her up. “Julie get up. We breaking out!”, I said. “What’s happening?”, she said half awake. “Just get I up!”, I urged. She shuffled out of the sheets and got out of the bed. We all tiptoed into the center of the room. “So how are we going to get out?”, I commented. “Well, we can escape through the bathroom window now. I fiddled with the lock and and then BAM! I got it unlocked so now we can open it up. It’ll be a tight fit , but it’s worth it.”, he replied.

 

We all quietly herded into the bathroom. Max hoisted himself up and through the window. Relief washed over me. We were finally getting away! After god only knows how long we’ve been stuck here. I am so happy! Max was grabbing Julie’s arm when we heard footsteps. I became uneasy hoping that Jason wouldn’t open the door in time. “Hurry!”, I said in a strained voice. Finally just as Max was grabbing my hand to pull me through the window Jason yanked on my ankle. I was flung to the ground. I had the metallic taste of blood in my mouth. I hated blood, so I started heaving and bile came out through my mouth. I was being dragged back into the room. An assault of slaps to the face, a knee in the stomach and a kick in the face. Repeatedly I was beaten from the anger Jason was harboring. I was left there on the ground, bleeding out. I ached all over. I felt bruises forming and more blood flowing. Every nerve in my body was reacting to where I had been hit. I didn’t have the strength to pick myself of. My body was limp and lifeless. I was accepting the fact that I could die. That my life was over, that I may no longer exist. I couldn’t control anything. I couldn’t control my fate. If I’m gonna die, I’m gonna die. I just have to accept it. It was going to happen eventually.

 

How could a person do this. Just keep brutally hurting a helpless person. Was it a habit or an uncontrollable problem? I know I must have been laying here for a few days now. I keep ignoring my grumbling stomach and dry throat. I can’t get up; I haven’t for days. I’m just going to stay here until everything is over and I can’t feel or see or hear. I think I blacked out because I don’t remember it being night. Last time I saw the sun was probably around 2 pm. It was really dark outside and it was raining. Maybe I’ve been unconscious for a day or two. I don’t remember anything from the past couple days except for being in agonizing pain after trying to escape with Max and Julie.Wait! Where are Max and Julie? Shouldn’t help be on the way. After all they did make it out the window. They should’ve told the police by now. Am I going to be stuck here forever? I don’t want my soul to be stuck here. I’d rather die in the hospital that in this horrid place. I know I’ve never really had a home, but I most certainly know I don’t want to die here. 

 

My one question was, why hasn’t anyone come to help me? To save me? Am I really that forgotten? Am I not remembered enough that people think that I never existed?

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

I’m still lying on the floor writhing in pain. I am sure that Jason broke my ankle, when he ripped me from the window. I really wished I made it through that window, but now I’m stuck here. I have such bad luck. Partly because I bring it upon myself and partly because it follows me. I am ready to leave this world. To leave everything behind. I am going to give up.

 

Just as I was about to take my last breath I heard someone saying something. “Don’t give up! Keep your heart beating! We’ll be at the hospital in no time! I promise! Just stay with me Autumn! Stay with me!”, said the unidentified voice. Did they say we were going to the hospital. Maybe there was hope and maybe I didn’t have such bad luck. I kept myself going. I kept pushing myself to survive and live as long as my body could take it. Now I was determine to stay alive. I had one little spark of courage left in me and I was giving it all I got.

 

When I came too, I was laying in a hospital bed with tubes running up and own my body. I felt foggy and I didn’t have much strength. I looked over to the side of the bed where I saw Max. His eyes flashed with relief and happiness when he saw my eyes open. “Autumn! Autumn! Autumn!” He gave me a hug. Woah. Why is Max here? “I’m so glad you’re not in comma anymore! Do you remember what happened?”, he asked. I nodded and then hugged him back. He called for my doctor and they came rushing in. They were pleased to see that I was quickly recovering and my broken ankle was also getting better. So I was right. Jason did break my ankle. “Did they catch him”, I asked in a raspy voice. “Yes.”, Max replied. “And I helped. He deserved to be taken to jail. After what he did. So are you sure you remember everything? Tell me what you remember.”, he pressed. “Um, I remember him taking me off the streets, taking care of me, then bringing Julie, bringing you, and then we tried to escape, but I got caught.”, I remarked. “You remember most of it, but not exactly all. Do you want me to tell you?”, he questioned. I nodded my head. I needed to know. I wanted to know. I was glad I was getting justice, and that Max and Julie also were. “Well, after Julie and I escaped he yanked you from the window and started to hit you. That’s why you have so many bruises all over your body. He also broke one of your ribs.”, Max explained. So that’s why it was hard for m to breath. All the pieces were coming together. “He also...”, he paused. I gave him a questioning look. “He did something very disturbing.” I nodded for him to continue. “He...he..he sexually assaulted you.”, Max spat out. HE WHAT! I don’t remember that! “I don’t remember that.”, I uttered. “It’s normal for you not to remember. The doctors said that you probably blocked the memory out because it was so traumatizing along with everything else that was happening.”, Max added. I can’t believe this. I mean I really thought I would’ve remembered something like that. Obviously not. I hope that son of a bitch gets life in jail because he deserves it. “If it makes you feel any better, when we came to get you, Jason was doing the disturbing thing and I was so outraged that I went up to him and knocked him out. He got a broken jaw because of how hard I hit him in the face.”, Max admitted. Wow so he really was nice. He cared enough to break someone’s jaw for me. Or maybe he like me, like that was even a possibility. I mean just look at me. I’m all bruised and broken with


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