They Tore Me Apart

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Memoir  |  House: Booksie Classic
Past

Submitted: July 05, 2009

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Submitted: July 05, 2009

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They tore me apart in more ways than one

I wish I knew how to stay away from that pain

But I was drawn to the glory

The glory of being accepted

The glory of being in

The glory of having everything I felt I needed at my reach

I learned how to cut

To slit my wrist down to the bone

I learned how to watch it without saying a word

When I learned this amazing habit of mine

I didn't realize it was just hurting me

I wrote with my blood to make me feel alive

I made designs out of my blood to feel like I was in control

They taught me how to say yes to drugs

To use them to feel better about myself

I abused the drugs

The only thing that made me feel happy

I didn't care that my memory would soon slip away

I soon discovered that my death seemed comical

It was funny to see a gun to my head

To see my friends turn me in for drug money

They taught me how to sleep around as if I was a nobody

I had no respect for myself

I didn't realize that I gave up a part of my soul to them when I gave myself up

I felt good about myself knowing I could fit the part they so desperately needed

They could no longer call me young in life because of my inexperiences

I gave up everything that meant anything to me

My family, friends, school, and personality

I lost everything that I needed to survive in this world

They taught me all of these things and yet they still left me as if I was a nobody

They tore me apart in more ways than one

I was young and ignorant

My mother should have told me not to hang out with them

But instead told me they were a good crowd

They tore me apart and now I have to start picking up the pieces again


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