Moments frozen in time

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Gay and Lesbian  |  House: Booksie Classic
Little piece of writing about the memories of my girlfriend and I getting together :).

Submitted: July 10, 2012

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Submitted: July 10, 2012

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It comes back to me in little, happy flashes. Delicate golden moments. 

Moments which are now mine and yours to quietly, happily keep forevermore.

 

I see you sitting there in a comfy armchair, wearing that soft knitted jumper with stars on it that I had snuggled into just hours earlier. 

The light from the large glass windows makes the white-blonde of your hair stand out. Your eyes are that dreamy light mixture of green and blue. I could gaze into them endlessly. I love how complex they are, how they're a masterpiece all of their own. I'm going to paint your eyes one day.

That smile, the one which only I get to see just drives me crazy. The way your lips tug up at each end - it makes me want to kiss you. Need to kiss you. It makes me crave kissing you all the more.

 

Sitting there with you, in the light with the sun in view and that look of love upon your beautiful face, I can't think of anything better than that.

 

The way you asked me to be your girlfriend was perfect. It felt so right, you asking me then. It felt right with that smile on your face and the happiness in my heart and our bubble. We were truly enveloped in each other.

And the way you said "I'm going to kiss you now", so softly, after I said yes, it was a moment of beauty. I've always read that line in books, seen it in films. Down inside my heart, in the darkest corner I wished for someone to say it to me. I wished for the realisation that I was on the verge of being kissed, and loved.

You said it to me. And I didn't even realise that I needed you to say it to me until you said it.

It was by no means our first kiss, but it almost felt like it was. It was one of those profound kisses in which emotion swelled inside me like a wave gathering momentum, and water threatened to trickle from my eyes because I felt that much.

  I felt more strongly than I had in too long. More happy. More reassured, and less lonely.

 

Nothing else seemed to exist. Other people in that cafe were a distant memory. The staff were gone. It was just you and your masterpiece eyes and your white-blonde hair and swoon-worthy smile and I thought to myself how did I get so lucky. How did I get through everything and emerge into this brilliant sunlight. Time sort of froze. Everything around me was you and nothing else could touch me, no one could hurt me.

 

We should have gone home together afterwards. We should have. It repeated in my head all the while as we walked to the train and parted reluctantly. If we could just live together now, things would be even better. Maybe I wouldn't have problems, and fears and nightmares, and maybe I would feel less crazy. Maybe my sanity would be guaranteed.

 

In my head, we trained together. Home, to our little apartment in the city. We tried our hardest not to touch each other too much on the train. We tried to hold it in as we fast walked to the block of apartments. We kissed slowly in the elevator, almost missing our floor.

I fished around in my handbag for the key card, swiped it desperately through the door lock while you made that impatient little noise and I bounced on the balls of my feet. I finally threw the door open and you pinned me against it, slowly sliding us properly into our apartment. 

You closed the door but didn't break our kiss, which was becoming more and more passionate.

 

I love it when you kiss my neck. I know what tugging on your earlobe with my teeth does to you. Unclipping your bra comes as an instinct to me now.

 

And I love how heavily you make me breathe and laugh and then moan.

 

In reality, I got on the train. Watched you through the window until the last possible moment. Tried hard to capture that image in my brain. It's lovingly filed away for safekeeping now - this whole memory is. As my train headed for a home without you I pulled out my phone, my lifeline to you and immediately texted you. Texting you helps to ease the pain of not seeing you every single moment of the day.

 

Back in my head we cuddle in each other’s arms, you playing with my hair and my hands running up and down the naked skin of your back. I feel the urge to tell you that I love you, and so I do. You say that you love me too. It always makes me smile, hearing that.

You kiss my nose, I giggle and snuggle into your familiar, happy warmth, inhaling the heavenly scent of you and we quietly fall asleep in each other’s arms under the sheets, safely nestled in the most comforting part of my mind, the most beautiful part of my imagination and the most tender part of my heart.

 

9/7/12

 


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