A Girl of Gold

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Fantasy  |  House: Booksie Classic
The Account of A Princep's Wife in the a distance land.
Her life story written by her own hand to exploit her sin and wrongs committed.

The Risen

Submitted: November 17, 2015

A A A | A A A

Submitted: November 17, 2015



Girl of Gold



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The following accounts are written by the late princeps Ismene of Flos Lucum.

A summary of her autobiography and the eyewitness accounts of her time on Earth with The Risen.

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Now, as I sit in the dimly lit room I call my living quarters, I reflect on all that has happened in during the span of my lifetime. Though my life here is reaching an end, I wish to resolve the sins I have committed by recounting them and putting my grief to rest. I first wish to state my repulsion with the acts I have committed and pray to the One for my chance at forgiveness. Secondly, I hope all who have read my testimony will convert to my faith and be able to experience eternal life, for I may not be so lucky. Lastly, I wish to only please my Lord with my account of my wrong doings and pray to him to allow other to forgive me in all the evil I have allowed to overtake me in life.

I shall start before the death of my father and the abandonment of my mother, and retouch on the history prior to these events.

My heart had been in torment for many ages. I clearly remember the pains of my people and the depression that seeped into the very dirt of the land, sucked dry of moisture without the Vitian showers of late Festival. The citizens lied in masses, scorched from the unforgiving sun like animals left unattended in the fields, swatting at the flies that plagued them with little hope still left in their glazed eyes. It sickened me as I sat perched in my own home, where even therenthe air was wretched and water was stale; the sun never did reach my castle as though knowing it could not break through the stone walls. The usual drought before the showers had been far harsher than any season the kingdom had seen before. The Aidean River had completely dried, leaving a hollow trail where it had once flowed abundantly. The common folk who had very little were under the greatest strain, already wth nothing yearlong. Several hundreds died from dehydration in the span of several weeks, leaving those who still clung to life outside our castle gates and demanding for access to our full well. Their access had been denied, to save as much water possible for our own enjoyment. Castle life went on as normal during those times, as long as you never went out a door or opened a single window. 

Word had traveled that an uprising against our family, the royals of Flos Lucum, had started to be spurred by an unknown, traitorous enemy that hid themselves like the wolf among the sheep in the fold. My high-strunk mother never dared to let the thought enter her mind, shooing away the gossips that frequently took advantage of our hospitality. My mother had once been one of them; they claimed Mother owed them for their perserverance in bewitching my naive father. The poor man had never been commonsensical; he never took into account anything Mother exaggerated. Father was a generous princeps who ruled beside another man, Antinous Shax. With the guidance of both Father and Princeps Shax, our small kingdom of Evelynda thrived, except during the droughts. The harvest was plentiful, our springs overflowed, and all things were fertile. Yet, when the time of the Dark Months occurred, they appeared to become more cruel and unforgiving each year that followed. My father had called it foreshadowing, for a future disaster that was soon to come. He was always wise in those ways, sharing all his knowledge to those he wished to prosper. Luckily, I had been one who he wished to love, and I would always love him dearly in return for his affection.

 I never knew how my mother charmed my father into their ginormous wedding. Her incivility and arogance was of no concern, typically overlooked by my father at any gathering or social affair. He would just laugh or ask my Mother to lower her voice at the innapropriate times she would howl, but Mother never stayed quiet. A lady was required to stay composed and mute unless addressed. Mother never was polite and speechless, bursting open like an overfilled milk pitcher. Once she had started to spill, everything was lost. She constantly spoke on and on for countless hours of the nights, causing the sleep in her attendants eyes and the yawns that tried to wrestle their way out of guarded mouths. All the Elite were bored with her and held back their looks of disgust at my Mother's presence at Festival. Father and Kleos, my uplifted brother, never saw her flaws like I did. Father often just listened with wonder, a face full of adoring and selfless love. Kleos never saw what was sinful in anyone. He saw only what was pure in every person of the kingdom. Mother's low status in my eyes was unknown to her.

During Mother's senseless babbles, all she spoke of was of the glory of her only son. She spoke of his fine face, his wisdom, and of how marvelous life would be when he became the next Princeps beside Shax's own son, Henry. Poor Henry was little compared to my lofty and muscular brother. I'd often heard the cruel jokes whispered about him by the servants, who shooed me away before I could get any closer. Kleos had fallen in love with his fame that was spread by both Mother and Father. Even Shax was quite impressed with his wit and intelligence at such a young age. Kleos stood taller, smiled wider, and spoke more eloquently than several scholars much older than he. But, I knew deep in his heart that Princeps was never what he had dreamed. He had often told me his tales of running off from this confinement of a castle to travel the Sericum Road with merchants that had embarked from all lands in the world. One evening when he had been away training in sword fighting, I had snuck into his room while pretending to be an noble traveler, one that I knew Kleos wished to be. Mother and Father rarely came into either of our rooms, and he had taken full advantage of our privacy. On his walls, he had nailed maps of several different place, some of our land, some of those we'd only ever heard of from the travelers, and some of lands that never existed in the first place. In ink, he had circled villiages and kingdoms, those he wished to see during his time as princeps. Kleos wished to travel, but he had been nailed at home by his soft hands and proper feet. 

The day came when Father died. Mother wailed uncontrollably for days, but never spoke of his departure again. (She would marry off in less than a year's time.) A great funeral took place in the square for the man who died conquering new lands in Litus Maris, a fair country that was tucked away by the Great Sea. Mother had pushed him unceasingly to conquer the country, in fear that the status of our homeland being far too little. Trying to please his tempest of a wife, he assemblied a great army before marching through the great forrests and desert land between the two kingdoms. The majority of his army had fled when met by the greater power. They returned alone, no leader in the stirrups of the noblest stallion. The day of the funeral was a hardship; I cried until no life was left in my face. Kleos and Mother never once shed a tear in front of the people. Their act of no compassion was repulsive in my young eyes; Father would have shed tears for their own misfortune. The grief in the castle lasted months while the sorrow in the towns only went about for weeks. None of the people missed my father, blaming him to be the cause of all the suffering they went through. At the time, I knew nothing about their sorrows, for I was only about thirteen at the time. As I gre older, the more I would learn more about the dilemnas of the people. 

As I had mentioned before, Mother remarried quickly. We learned an hour before her depart that she had married to a foreign duke of Igna Dome. Both of us had run quickly to her side, begging her to change her mind and let the three of us stay in Evelynda. Our hearts were then shattered when she told of us of her true plans. She told us simply that she truly despised this kingdom and wished to leave for Igna Bome, a far richer and larger kingdom in the north. She never wished to bring us, as we were Flucumians. We were never included in her description to the Duke. I believe he never knew of our existence. Kleos and I were abandonned in Evelynda to be tended by Shax, a devil of a man. Thus begun one of the most awful, unending stages of my life.

We called Shax the Hound. He knew of everything that went on in our kingdom. The three of us, including Shax's frail and weak-minded son Henry, developed theories of spies and a secret guard the sole Princeps had employed. We believed those stories were true for a long time. The Hound also knew of our own doings. Our threesome was quite often punished for our gossip."No member of my household shall allow such defiled language to escape their mouths. Leave that for the horrid prostitutes and uneducated, scoundrel women." Shax scowled one late evening, sending the poor servant girls into flight for the kitchen. "It is quite a shame your damned mother influenced you both so." I felt terrified that my heart was singing in agreement, for I hated my mother.

"Never speak of our mother that way!" Kleos had errupted, shattering the glass plates with his clenched fists. Henry's eyes had dropped to the floor; my own never leaving my raging brother. Shax then beat Kleos senseless until his back was a maroon red and he lied unmoving on the stone floor. I myself was the only one who cared for Kleos to drag his limp body back to his own bed; no servant was allowed to carry him to bed by Shax's decree. I left him there to cry for Mother as I slept with tears in my eyes for Father. Mother would never be of help to us. Father was the only good man I'd ever known. He would never have let a hand on either of our heads.

Even with the abuse of Shax, I never wanted to leave the castle. I belonged in its courts and could feel that my presense was to become important in the future of Evelynda. Kleos never shared the same thoughts as myself. His hate of royal life was sickening. Shax had poisoned his mind to reject our ways that he used to adore. Kleos now spent his time in the study, in the presense of the "holy" men who travelled around the countries each preaching of their own sovereign god. Shax and myself were disgusted by these men that polluted the kingdome; it was the sole thing we had in common. None of the people in Evelynda had a god they worshipped or praised as a divine being, which was quite the ridiculous idea. No man could live forever and rule over the entire world. There was no solid proof behind it. My brother had once invited me to hear the mens' teachings, because of how insightful they had been to him. My rejection hurt him more than I knew. What he had told me of the "scripture" he heard was in no means true. I often was shocked by what they had led my bright and wise brother to believe. When I accused him of his ignorance, he only laughed and stated that "one day I'd come to know my Lord." I scoffed and said he should come to know that our Lord was the unmerciful man that raised us. 

Kleos and I drew apart in those later years as I reclined into the social world while he was enchanted by his new found religion. He was so like father. Both were bewitched into believing things that had too much fortune to be true, the prime example being Mother. Henry and I shared our similar belief in the no divinity and challenged Kleos often, trying to snag him and return him to the true world. But he never listened. His faith to a new "God" was so strong that it frightened the both of us. He sent everday in his room in a deep state which he called "prayer". He spoke to an invisible man, who had given him a great book to study from. I had read a few lines from the book, all filled with parables and tales that made no realistic sense. The biggest being something called a Trinity, the God called the Three in One. No man could be three people at once. 

(Lord I now understand my fault! I understand how I was unbelieving! Curse my young age! Curse my unbelievvign heart that rejected my dear and wise brother, who knew of your greatness! I curse myself for reading your word and ingnoring its beauty and power!)

Kleos was older than Henry by a short term of years. Once he had reached 20 years of age, he left the palace to walk the world and preach like the holy men. The afternoon of his leave, he desperately tried to persuade me to join him.

"Ismene," He said, "Come with me and hear the word of the Great God! He does all wonders, created our very Evelynda, and promises us life for eternity! We shall tell others of his glory together and be with each other always in paradise!"

"There is no life after death!" I had screamed. "What sickness has entered your mind to believe such a distorted idea? You are in a false world, Kleos. Come with me into the world of the living. You are leaving me like Mother! You are leaving me to be abused by Antinous Shax and to suffer the rest of my life alone."

"You appear to be more of the daughter of Shax than our Father. He would be displeased with your own lack of understanding." Kleos packed his things and left the castle. I saw only small sympathy when I ran from the room, my face flooded with tears. I never heard from him again, besides the great stories that still echo of his name today.

My grief for him lasted a full year until I could stand to be without him. I had spent months at a time in my living quarters, the only people to see my face being the slaves that fed me. Shax never once came to see if I was still alive or dead. Henry had come few times before becoming bored of my muteness. I often sat in my bed, looking out the glass windows towards the well that sat in the middle of the grand gardens. Mother had ordered for them to built to become her private sanctuary. I had never been allowed in them as a child. As I stared down at them then, all the flowers had withered and the weeds were the only beauty left in this once elaborate garden. I broke down then to tears, as I knew this was now the world I lived. 

When I had reached the age of 16,  Shax declared that my mourning be ended. He had ordered for my presense in his large sitting room. Henry, now at age 23, was present as well. That day, I learned I would be married to Henry, becoming the Lady of Evelynda. Henry had told me of his deep love for me, but I could not return his affection and wished to decline. I was willed to change my mind when Shax's dagger had been held to my throat. I was to accept or face a "tragedy" to which I would not return. This brought me back into my whirwind of depression, that lasted through several years. I remember clearly when I cried in my wedding dress, my Mother's dress when marrying my Father. The wedding had been a delight to all that attended except for myself. I remember the fears and sadness I felt being led to my new husband's chambers. I was alone in my grief. I never truly knew if Henry ever loved me.

The most vivid memory was the hour wher I reached out to my brother. Before the wedding, in my frantic state, I wrote him the letter I had wished to tell him in person on the day of his departure. I remember it as if I had written in but an hour ago:

My dearest brother Kleos,

Safe me from my torment here! I can't go on living in this prison any longer! I write to you know in my state of depression as I sit in my wedding dress forced upon my body. My marriage to Henry is to happen today, but I would rather be a bride in the underworld than live in luxury under the man who's hatred never ceases. By Antious Shax's dagger, I was forced into this arrangement. The fear and sorrow I felt the day of your leave has returned to me, and I contemplate ending my life with the knife they have given me to cut my morning bread. I know if you were here with me, my heroic brother, that no harm would come to me by any other hand. You and father were the kindest of souls to me. I beg of you, be my savior! I will leave you all I possess on my deathbed, Brother, if you do not come for me in time. I wish to know that you do plan to come for me. I have never been in more pain. I am no longer living though I am alive, so what be it if I shall end my life if there was never any life in it.

May I never see your face were I am going soon.


I sent the letter that morning. I received no response. As it is clear, I couldn't bring myself to suicide, for I didn't know it yet, but there was true purpose to my wretched life.


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