Today after i got home, i skyped guy two telling him that guy one is going to be staying with me. lets just say that didnt go over very well, he got all jelious and didnt want to talk, i left him alone for a hour called him back. he asked how long guy 1 would be stay and i said two weeks minimum, he said ill talk to u for two weeks but if he is still there after that im done:/ now oviously that wasnt what i wanted to hear even worst, he tells me he is canceling his trip to come down..... def. not what i wanted. i said atleast i told you what was going on... i could have hid it from you so we argued for about a hour not knowing what to do, hes trying to tell me i lost my feelings for him if im letting guy 1 stay with me but as i told him im letting him stay with me because i have no where else to go....
while all this is going on guy one is texting me getting the final details finished for his arival tomorrow... thanking me for taking him in and how he knows hes fucked up but, wants to do better and try to make things work, cause he doesnt want to lose me, now iv told him time and time again the shit needs to stop but im hoping by him living under my roof and my rules things might actually start to look up:) its always good to have hope i guess but at the same time my heart is being pulled two diffrent dirctions and i dont want to have to make a choice yet..... its never does get easy does it?! its always one thing after another well im gunna go for now ill write more as soon as i have more to tell:)
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