An oration by Shindemura Yuu
This is love, I feel it for him
I feel so much for him, as I trust in him,
And I was very loyal to him,
His words caress my very soul.
My happiness is to make him happy, yet…
Why, oh why does it seem to be?
A marionette am I to him, this can be?
I’m well aware of this, yet I am blind.
Am I blinded to him?
Am I deaf when I listened to his voice?
Am I mute never to say no?
Yes, I am…because I am his marionette.
Every word he says I obey…
Every mind he speaks out, I acknowledged…
I am a puppet, never to speak, never to act freely
Yes, I am…because I love him.
He makes me obey his words, too far to be possible
Become a marionette, he says
I was seen as a living statue by people around me
Yet I didn’t do anything, because I love him.
One instance, he lets me pick up broken glasses
My hands bleed and he was pleased
I felt not the pain of my hands, but on my heart
He treats me only like a lifeless marionette.
An instance, he lets me wear a bridal gown
To go and announce to all, I am his own
I obeyed him, and all the laughter in me were focused
But I carried it on all for him.
I have suffered cruelty, been in trash
All mimicry were cries of joys for those who witnessed
All mimicry were spikes of sorrows for me
But I still walked in this glorious path, as a marionette.
He continues to insult my very being
Saying he loves me, and I am his own
I am his toy, his marionette, his possession
For there would be all to be a marionette.
He only sees me as a puppet
A lifeless figure labeled as his personal collection
Am I still alive for him, am I still his beloved one?
He only sees me now as a marionette.
Inside my heart, I wanted wrath, but I can’t
I couldn’t bring that into him
I wanted him to be happy that I will do what he asks
All for this love, I became a marionette.
I still am a marionette to him…
Yet, he is still my love.
I know all these were lies,
And no love from him actually existed
I was just his slave, the true side of his love
He only sees me as a marionette.
He went closer to me, wanted more mimicry
I shall not suffer no more! I declared!
With full force the knife went through his chest, his heart…
His eyes widened when my hands pulled the blade into him.
Now he is lying, pale, miserable and dead…
And in his own blood he bathed, lying in my arms
I only felt contentment from my heart in his corpse
Because I love him…as his marionette.
© Copyright 2017 yuu shindemura. All rights reserved.
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