The Withered Flower

Reads: 2011  | Likes: 0  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 10

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

A short story revolving around an ordinary man and an innocent child, a withered flower. These withered flowers have to do things that are done way ahead their age. This story is based on an incident between that boy and the man.

The roads and streets were crowded with people, there was hustle and bustle on the streets,  The streets were jam-packed like when you pack 20 salmons in a tin of 5, horns were blaring wildly. The roads were blocked. It looked like a flood of cars on the street.

 "Let me help you cross the street".

Andrew said to a young boy, in dirty clothes and lifting huge briefcases. It looked like the boy was afraid of the oncoming cars and wasn't able to cross the street. "Thanks Uncle". The boy said in a thankful manner and handed some of the bags to Andrew. The boy took the hand of Andrew and started to cross the street.

When Andrew and the boy was crossing the street, the young boy was continuously giving a little push to Andrew on his side. Andrew thought that the boy was afraid of the cars and that's why he was gripping his hands tighter and he thought that the boy wanted to stick closely to him. When they crossed the street, Andrew advised the boy in a strict manner.

"Run to your home and don't talk to strangers".

The boy nodded. Andrew then started to walk down the street to his home when he passed a gift shop. He thought to buy gifts for his family because he was coming home after a long long time. He entered the shop and the salesman greeted him very nicely.

"Good day Sir! How may I help you?" "Uh.. I was hoping to buy some gifts for my family, you know perfumes, t-shirts and stuff like that." Andrew told the salesman.

"Sir! we have a great variety of perfumes and t-shirts. I hope you'd love them."

The salesman told Andrew and started to show him some of the products. After selecting, he went to the counter. The saleswoman said to Andrew that the total bill was 250 dollars.

"Ok, here's your money.

" He started to search his pocket but the money was gone.

"How come this can happen? I remember I picked up the money from the table"

. He murmured to himself. The saleswoman was waiting, so Andrew had to quietly leave because he didn't had the money. Then suddenly, his mind clicked. He remembered that the boy was giving him a push on the side- pocket where was his money, after crossing the street, he saw that there were dollars in the hands of the boy, but he didn't take much notice of it.

He suddenly realized that he had been pickpocketed by that innocent flower, but it was the fault of the society which was not giving any choice to the innocent flowers other than to start commiting crimes. He would had been a blossoming flower, an innocent flower. But the society changed him into a Withered Flower sadly.

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Copyright © Zayn- Ul- Abidin  2013


Submitted: December 03, 2013

© Copyright 2020 Zayn Ul Abidin. All rights reserved.

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Comments

avatar

city-lights

Wow i really like the idea of this. Great job! :) how about breaking down the first paragraph into smaller paragraphs as its easier to reaad and the speach could be put on a differant line, other than that i think you've done an amazing job! :3

Thu, August 8th, 2013 10:39am

Author
Reply

I think you're right.... I will think of it.

Thu, August 8th, 2013 3:44am

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Aniqa

haha this is so common in India ^_^ but great story! loved it! ^_^

Thu, August 8th, 2013 3:12pm

Author
Reply

It is also common in other parts of the world.. it happened to me one day so I decided to write one.

Thu, August 8th, 2013 6:45pm

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FAHMIDA

I do agree with you. The story was really good. It was detailed very well written Zayn good one.
And Eid-ul-fitr mubarak" to you and your family.
Bye bro:)

Thu, August 8th, 2013 7:52pm

Author
Reply

Thanks.. Eid Mubarak to you too.. sister.

Thu, August 8th, 2013 6:43pm

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JoelatRpg

I like how unique the message is in this short story. It was also well done. Thanks for sharing:)

Thu, August 8th, 2013 8:37pm

Author
Reply

Thanks for such a great compliment.

Thu, August 8th, 2013 6:42pm

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nenao

I like the message in this story :) Really well written too. Although, try organize your writing in paragraphs. Other than that, well done! =D -Nenao

Fri, August 9th, 2013 5:40pm

Author
Reply

oh I will surely.
Zayn

Sat, August 10th, 2013 1:29am

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smircle

I wasn't really sure where this was going at the start, but I was drawn into it anyway. I really like the unique way you gave the message; good descriptions and well written. Maybe break the first paragraph up a bit? Others have said that and you're probably sick of it, but good job :)

Sat, August 10th, 2013 5:46pm

Author
Reply

You know me better fella. I'm definitely sick of it but the problem is that I'm in my village for some days and there is no internet connection here so I use my brother's cell to use internet which isn't available on my phone..

Sun, August 11th, 2013 12:31am

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masharocks

WOW! I absolutely love everything about this - the writing style, the plot and he idea. Your words flow very well.

Sat, September 7th, 2013 10:39pm

Author
Reply

Thanks for appreciating. ;)

Sat, September 7th, 2013 10:05pm

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PatienceIsAVirtue

Great story! I was actually alittle suprised that the boy had taken the money! :)

Sat, November 16th, 2013 6:06pm

Author
Reply

Thanx!!!

Sat, November 16th, 2013 10:30pm

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April Pearl

A simple story yet there's a wonderful message in it.Good one Zayn!

Sat, March 22nd, 2014 4:26pm

Author
Reply

Thanks! :)

Sat, March 22nd, 2014 11:12am

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mhamzasiddiqui

this is one of the nicest stories I have ever read. Loved the concept. But, I guess the ending would have been done in a more dramatic or, in a more elaborated way. Like you would have described about that young boy(innocent flower). Why he was forced to do it? What forced him to do that, and so on.. Otherwise, the story was brilliant! Mhamzasiddiqui

Fri, April 11th, 2014 9:57am

Author
Reply

Thanks for an honest opinion bro! I appreciate your compliment! Yeah! You are right, it was just I was a newbie those days.. didn't have much skill... That's all! :)

Fri, April 11th, 2014 8:07am

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