The lost piece of my world

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
It is personal, but I believe one in four women can relate.
I wrote it when I felt like the world was closing above my head like cold water, drowning me, and I guess I wanted to swim back into reality.
I would appreciate you comments.

Submitted: March 15, 2013

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Submitted: March 15, 2013




I didn't necessarily get destroyed

Over that man 

Fucking my mostly unconscious body

Not really.

I actually don't even remember it well, you see.

Tons and tons of trials 

To stop experiencing feeling

Led me to a brilliant numbing drink-

Of vodka.

So I am obviously the one

Responsible for my failure 

To be able to speak,

And say, when he took off my underwear

That I would actually like him 

To stop.

Surprisingly calm,

I am now lying in that very same bed

And unlike in other cases of shit 

That I've been through

This one does not make me 

Stop sleeping and living,

Although I have sometimes 

Moments of severe anger,

And fear, and guilt,

That is as much of myself 

I am willing to give 

To this lost piece of my world.

I won't say stolen.

I think it's me, 

Who gave it away

And just let it happen

And the only time I cried 

Was ironically when 

That brilliant numbing drink 

Didn't work,

And the happy music chords

Were jumping all across

That very same bed I lie in.

Where I so much as didn't

Control myself enough

To say "stop"

Or maybe scream 

That I am hurt

And that he should get off me 

Because he is the one

Hurting my very being.

© Copyright 2018 Zoe Sahibova. All rights reserved.

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