Adult_humor stories, books, poems, and more

25 results

Reads: 200

Comments: 1

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

You say you want a resolution? Well, you know … we’re all full of shit. Every year, we make the same New Year’s resolutions—which should tell us, by now, that we must not be all that serious about following through with any of it. Read More
“Why don’t you eat mine like you eat hers?” Read More

Reads: 223

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

A teenage girl approached her mother. “Mom, I think I’m half pregnant.” Read More
Twas Halloween night, and everything was alright, Because my horny little vampire, was coming over for a bite. Read More

Reads: 183

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

Be careful what you ask for ... she just might get it. Read More

Reads: 122

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

This piece is an Adult Humor short. Read More

Reads: 732

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

Thank you, history, for the orgy of wise words you’ve kept for us, stowed deep and wide in your voluminous anals. Wisdom (like knowing how to spell ‘annals’) is always a precious commodity … especially these days ... Read More
Because at the professional level, all sports are extreme sports. They don’t relate at all to what we weekend warrior amateurs do, except maybe the rules, and the balls. That’s why I’m proposing a new league … a winners’ league … The Small Ball Steroid League. Read More

Reads: 346

Comments: 1

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

I used to date these twin sisters, and there was no way I could tell them apart with their panties on. Read More

Reads: 240

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

Okay, here’s the situation. You’ve got an iconic TV show to put together, and one of your lead actors has gotten himself in trouble with the law. He’s a huge part of the show, and you can’t live without him—but he’s in shit so deep you can’t live with him… Read More
It’s enough to piss off the Pope? Well if it is, it must be really, really bad. Most of the time, the Pope just turns the other cheek—in über Christ-like fashion. But he’s only human, so you know that sometimes, things get under even his skin. They push his buttons,… Read More

Reads: 366

Comments: 1

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

It’s a funny thing, being eaten alive. Read More
It’s so friggin’ cold outside, I can’t believe it. I caught a snowman trying to get into my house, so he could warm his snow-ass up. Read More
"What's the huge smile on your face for?" said one Pilgrim girl to the other. "All these chores we have to do?" Read More

Reads: 235

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

"Hey?what are you doing in here?" "A little steamin', a little boilin', a little bakin'…" "Um … I'm afraid I don't understand." I'm fixing Thanksgiving dinner." "You are? But … you're a turkey." Read More
"Oh dear God! James! What are you doing to the turkey?" Read More

Reads: 342

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

Tom the turkey was drinking beers with one of his buddies. Read More
"Did you know that turkey fat was the original spermicide?" Read More
A college girl brought her new boyfriend home for Thanksgiving. Read More
"Have fun, kids. And don't forget the Thanksgiving birth control secret." Read More
If ye cometh at the table, ye shall be asked to leave! Ye may laugh, however. Read More

Reads: 943

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

Big Dick is a porn star. You know how he got his nickname? Well, his name is Richard. And he's un-small. They also call him Thick Dick. 'Cause he ain't so bright. Which must be why LA County, CA has passed a law mandating condoms for porn stars, and requiring… Read More
The author Harlowe Pilgrim interviews Mary Magdalene - also known as Mrs. Jesus Christ. Read More

Reads: 312

Comments: 1

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

Hello everybody. I'm Harlowe Pilgrim, author of the book Jesus Vs. Santa. When I finished the book, I conducted interviews with some of its stars. First off is my interview with Jesus Christ. It went like this: Read More

Reads: 3192

Comments: 1

Shelves: 1

The Booksie Classic House

If Jesus isn’t happy … nobody’s going to be happy. Jesus Christ is not pleased with Santa Claus and the secular celebration of his birthday. A chance meeting brings them together, and their wives—Mary Magdalene and Mrs. Claus—have their hands full. (Adult Humor) This is the first 3 chapters of… Read More
Booksie 2017-2018 Short Story Contest

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