BreShortStories

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BreShortStories

Location: United States

Member Since: January 2012

Open for read requests: Yes

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Hello, finally decided to do this. I'm Bre. Let me tell you a little about myself. Firstly, I'm extremely attracted to the same sex.. but.. but, don't worry I'm not gay. Don't you just hate when girls do that? I hope you caught my sarcasm, I'm a huge queer.                                                                                                                                                                                                                              So, tonight I'm your genealogist, and I'm just gonna go on a limb here but judging from your face, arms, legs, and vagina, you never even heard of the word 'razor' before, huh? I mean the minute I walked in I taught you decided to bring your rat with you and its just sleeping on your lip, then you brought your cat in and its just hiding underline your skirt to try and get the rat. Hmm.. looking at your panties here, Id say you haven't bathed in any kind of way since you woke up from your winter hibernation. Wow, I don't even know what I'm lookin' at here, oh, dont mind the paper clip over my nose its just your vagina smells worst than a room filled with rotted dead babies. In the sun. 100 degrees. Wow, if I took a burger with everything on it it still wouldn't describe what I'm looking at here, oh wait, just.. gotta.. rip it in half, there. Aww, twins.                                                                                             Ahem, like a sir, ahem. Deep voice. So, Bre what do you see yourself doing in five years? Well, Dr. Speaks-A-lots, I see myself glueing the lips below her waist together and then I will he shouting, how you say, one less Slut to walk the fucking earth. (white chapel - forgot the song though) Well, ahem. Deep voice. Ahem. What do you see yourself doing a year later? I see myself figuring out what pose, I will be doing for my mug shot. Maybe go old, you know the peace sign, the duck-face seems rather popular. Trust me, I am a very charming person. This is just my humor. One of my many great traits.                                                                                                                                                                                    My pick uplines that never(Always) fails: Hey sexual, want to get together and have seduction? What's my favorite book? You.. let's open you up and explore explaration points. Yes, I am seriously this awkward. ^                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Others things about me: I am actually a really nice person. Not to be self-centered, but one of the nicest you'll meet. Not being self-centered, I just get that a lot so I figured 'what the hell'? I love screamo, I'm in a couple of bands, I scream. And yes, I take reading-request, warning: I'll be a lazy fuck any probably not do them.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             Last thing, recently I've started turning my stories into Manga, like Beautiful Heart is being turned, hence the terrible grammer, I'm just trying to get shit done.                                                        I'm.. not on crack I promise -sniffle, large inhale- its just sand I found out of your dads buttholes, -sniff- he said it was edible, he.. he.. he said it would take me to narina to meet island, I don't even know how the fuck to spell his name -sobs- I was gonna ride him to get my pot of gold -rocks back and forth- the gold stolen by my baby. My baby stole my gold and now I need to get it back. . _ . ...Wut?.. so.. I hope you guys like me, or this freaked the shit out of you and you stopped reading. In case you didn't.. read my stories :D they aren't as trippy as this, but some of them might be.

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Booksie 2017-2018 Short Story Contest

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