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animals, voluntering, reading&writing (duhh), romance, good pictures, alternative/indie/singer-songerwriter music, and singing.
Stupid people (and everything they make, do, say, or think)
FUNNY AND RANDOM
Why do we teach kids that violence
is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school
that solved America's problems?
If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?
364 days of the year, parents tell
their kids not to take candy from
strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that?
Before you criticize someone, walk
a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and
you have their shoes.
An apple a day keeps the doctor
away, if well aimed."
Never do anything you dont want to explain to the paramedics.
Apparently 1 in 5 people are
Chinese, and there are five people in my familly so it must be
one of them. It's either my mom or dad. Or my older brother,
Colin. Or my younger brother, Ho-Chan-Chu. But i think it's
If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?
Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?
Why do companies offer you "free
gifts?" Since when has a gift NOT been
You know the expression, "Don't
quit your day job?" Well, what do you say to
people that work nights?
Why do you get in trouble for blocking an exit when you're standing in the doorway? In case of an emergency, wouldn't you run out, too, therefore NOT blocking the exit?
When someone annoys you it takes 42
muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend
your arm and punch them.
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else
A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.
I'm not so good at advice. Can I
interest you in a sarcastic comment?
People say "Guns don't kill people,
People kill people!" Well, I think guns help. If you stood there
and yelled Bang, I don't think you'd kill too many
Doctors say I have multiple personalities. We disagree with that.
I don't have an attitude problem, you have a perception problem.
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