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Location: United States

Member Since: June 2017

Last online: June 2017

Open for read requests: Yes

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Expectations. They push us to do our best, or they keep us so far underwater that we can never catch a breath. The expectations of good grades, getting into college, pleasing the parents, playing sports, and still having a social life. The expectation of yourself to be ultimately happy. All of life’s expectations can sometimes get too heavy that we drown… But hopefully someone will save us.  

    It was too much, school, parents, friends, sports. Everything got caught up in a huge web where I was stuck at the middle and couldn’t get out of the threaded lies of being perfect. So I left. I left the town that held all the expectations of growing up. I left the school that held all the expectations of being a perfect student. I left the house with all the expectations of being the perfect daughter. I left. I didn’t feel trapped, I felt forcefully guided to future that I didn’t want.

    I drove for 3 hours, not knowing where I was going or really what I was doing. Feeling tired, I stopped at a roadside diner, maybe I would find someone in this remote diner that understood me. How this place got any business I didn’t know. I walked inside cautiously, because it wasn’t like the diner back home. I didn’t feel welcome like I did at the diner back home. It wasn’t cozy and the owner didn’t care about the customers nor did they know my order the second I came in. It was retro and vintage, something you would see from straight out of the 70’s. There were neon lights and red stools at the counter. I should have been able to fit right in with my long blond hair, flared jeans, and a striped turtleneck. But I didn’t feel comfortable, I felt disconnected.   I sat down at a booth in the corner, and soon after a waitress came to my booth she asked me what I wanted. What I wanted was to be accepted for the future I wanted, and to not treated like this perfect person I pretended to be.

After a few seconds I snapped back into reality when the waitress asked, “ You alright sweetie?”

“Yes. I’ll have a cheeseburger. Thank you.” I answered.

As she walked away I started to think how I wasn’t okay and how much pressure I put on myself, it wasn’t the teachers, friends, family, or the town that put all the expectations on me it was me. It’s up to me whether other people’s opinions affect me or not. Everything stopped in this exact moment. And nothing else mattered in that minute. I got in my car and drove back to the diner where I was comfortable, I went back to the town that I thought was boring, and the next day I went back to the school that scared me the most. I finally noticed that everyone had already accepted me for me and that it was me who hadn’t.









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