Short Story / Humor
Short Story / Humor
Poem / Humor
My name is Robert, or Malo Beto, or any variation of those.
I just turned 17. Not that it really matters though.
I Go to a Catholic School where I've been Wrestling for the past two years.
Despite, or maybe because of, going to a Catholic School I am an Atheist. That doesn't mean that I am 100% sure there is no god/s, It means that I have no reason to believe a god is even possible. Its like big-foot, or the Great Green Arkleseizure, no one can really prove they don't exist but there really is no reason to believe they do.
At this point i would like to have everyone roll a d20... add your religion skill to the roll.... if the total is 20 or greater you know that the Great Green Arkleseizure is the creator of the universe as claimed by adherents of the faith on planet Viltvodle VI. Their legend has it that the universe was sneezed out of the nose of the Great Green Arkleseizure, and they thus "live in perpetual fear of the time they call 'The Coming of the Great White Handkerchief.'"
Now that I have proved my nerdiness I can continue.
I have been fencing for about 6 or 7 years now. Thats fencing as in sword fighting not putting up fences although I've done some of that as well. I fence Epee because foil is... weird and Sabre is, as my fencing coach told me, "for Neanderthals".
Now to get some facts straight:
Edward Elric is by far supirior to Edward Cullen in every manner possable
Vampires don't sparkle in sunlight, they burn and die.
The answer to life, the Universe, and everything is 42. Now we just need to figure out the question.
Once you see, and understand the monster in any form of horror it is no longer scary.
Batman is a better character than Superman
Adding a plot to Loony Tunes does not make it better.
Hollywood seems to no longer be able to produce good movies.
Jesus promised the end to all evil people. Odin promised the end to all frost giants. You dont see many frost giants around anymore.
Life is a fatal STD everyone has.
The best song to kill anything to, espeacally in a mall, is Bethoveen's 9th particularly the 2nd and 4th movements.
Overacheiving is Overrated
Just because it's in a bottle doesnt make it good beer.
Eragon is just basically the plot of Star Wars in Lord of the Rings setting... with dragons and a completely unbalanced magic system thrown in for good measure.
There are only two ways to deal with trolls: out troll them, or attempt to starve them.
The Pastafarian heaven is supirior to the Christian one
With strange eons you will find that even death may die.
And thats all I have to say about that...
By the way if you want me to read anything religious. I would be happy to, but be warned I will give my opinion. Ill try to politely but that will also depend on how polite you are... and how crazy what you wrote was.
Or if you just want to talk to me (be it philosophical conversation, religious debate, or you just want to talk to me, why you would want to do that I cannot say) my e-mail is: firstname.lastname@example.org
Oh and if you read and comment on any of my stuff I really appriciate it. It's Really hard to be motivated to write when no one reads anything you write. That said I understand if you dont have the time. I'm pretty busy too.
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